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Learn to ask for help Weekender Oct. 5-11

Old 10-07-2017, 07:15 AM
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Thanks, MLD. I have problems asking for help too. I'm in for a sober weekend.
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Old 10-07-2017, 10:33 AM
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Preachiness warning...!!

Hi friends...just finished coffee and a walk around my house. The warm sun, cool breeze carrying the first scents of fall. My heart and soul are at peace. I am so very fortunate to have survived my addiction.

I lost a lot, but certainly did not lose all...which could have happened any one of the many times I got behind the wheel, or drank to oblivion out of town among strangers. I am so grateful and so lucky. I don't think anyone or anything supernatural is “looking out for me”, or “ it wasn't my time”, or things happen/don't happen “for a reason”. No. It is pure capricious luck that I did not lose everything before I stopped drinking.

Asking for help, saying we need help, wishing someone would/could help...these are not the same as GETTING and TAKING help. I hope I have the courage to GET and TAKE help when I need it. We will all need help again, even if we never drink again...ill health, a financial blow, a major loss...something will come along. If I don't seek out and then take the help I need—well then I know my old buddy alcohol will be waiting to pull me right to the bottom of the lake.

Sorry if this was a downer post on a beautiful Sober Saturday. I know there are people struggling and suffering. Help is out there, and help can HELP. We have to take it, grab help with both hands, leaving no hands free to pick up a drink.
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Old 10-07-2017, 10:41 AM
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So....

On this beautiful day that I am so grateful and lucky to have...I am now finishing up dishes from breakfast and lunch, then will head out to spend the afternoon with my sweet mother in her senior living apartment IN MY TOWN! Glory! Then before coming home for a late supper of beans and cornbread and last-of-the-season tomatoes, I will try to finish out my (pitiful) goal of 8k steps for the day, with a walk around a small park near my Mom’s place.

See? Life=good.
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Old 10-07-2017, 10:59 AM
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Your post was not a downer at all BixBees, your are right, you have to teach out for help, it won't arrive by magic. I hope your mom is well.

Endless rain today, I am trying to persuade a friend to come with me to see Blade Runner, if not I will watch the original tonight and go on my own tomorrow.
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Old 10-07-2017, 11:30 AM
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Evening everyone, thought I'd jump in. I haven't read the whole thread but it's such an interesting topic. Asking for help for anything was kind of frowned upon when I was growing up. You had to 'just get on with it'. And 'pull yourself together'. That kind of stuff stays with you so I count myself among the ones who have difficulty with it.

Thankfully the younger generation (gosh that makes me feel old, I'm 58!) may find it easier to open up about problems. Add to that, here in the west of Scotland being able to 'handle your drink' is viewed as some kind of badge of honour, it's no wonder our alcohol problems are off the chart!

Happy to be here and check in over the weekend, it's always a tricky time. Have a good Saturday night everyone.

Sao, I saw the trailer for Blade Runner a couple of weeks ago in the cinema, it looked great! It is on my to see list.
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Old 10-07-2017, 12:09 PM
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Welcome to Weekenders lilymaz, western Scotland is a very scenic part of the world.

I am going to have to defer Blade Runner until tomorrow as I have a headache - a rarity since I quit.
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Old 10-07-2017, 12:11 PM
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I remember the first Blade Runner as being bizarre - especially the first scene in the nightclub.

Maybe boys look at it differently.
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Old 10-07-2017, 12:27 PM
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Hope you feel better soon, Sao!
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Old 10-07-2017, 07:59 PM
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Had a nice time at the in-laws thanks giving dinner. Seems they took it easy on the booze today. I wonder if the heightened awarness of other peoples drinking goes away with sober time....
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Old 10-07-2017, 11:37 PM
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I loved your post BixBees. Not a downer at all.
I have issues asking for help. I am a very solitary person. I don't like to get to close to people or rely on anyone because once my guard is down I can get hurt. I'm so scared of opening up and feeling vulnerable...even with my husband. Something I really need to work on I guess.
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Old 10-08-2017, 03:20 AM
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Morning everyone,

Welcome to Weekenders Mish!

It is a beautiful morning in London, I often go for a short run in the mornings but this morning I managed about 7 miles. That's the longest run I have managed for ages as my arthiritis often plays up.

This is a small branch of the tidal River Lee, apart from the Thames it is the only overground river left in London. The building is a tide mill and there is a fund raising operation underway to restore and preserve it.
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Old 10-08-2017, 04:05 AM
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Beautiful photo Sao.
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Old 10-08-2017, 05:18 AM
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Dragon, I still tend to keep track of peoples' drinking. Although it is less a count and more a, "Well, I'll just give him the benefit of the doubt on that one, he's had a few."

I do tend to not give much credence to what people say after they've had two or three - the conversation really degenerates after that.

It's steak and eggs Sunday. I've got the Eagle cam up in the background online here, they are rebuilding the nest in preparation for eagle egg(s.)

Eagle Cam Live Feed
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Old 10-08-2017, 05:53 AM
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Nice run Sao, I'm looking forward to doing long distances myself. After nearly a year sober and finally back at the gym, I feel like this guy when I'm done intervals on the treadmill.

https://youtu.be/IWu9o5zrj3g
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Old 10-08-2017, 08:39 AM
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So there are 147 members online and 2500 (yes, 2500) visitors online right now.

Prayers for the suffering alcoholics, addicted, and their loved ones. Jump in and post, it may change your life.

I guess that kind of solidifies how important it is for those of us who are in recovery to help where we can. I don't feel like I'm much help most of the time, but who knows? I do have a story and only I can tell it.

The sober side rocks.
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Old 10-08-2017, 09:07 AM
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Hi,
What a great topic. I haven't been around in a while and it was really nice to see this.
I still struggle with picking up that phone when I need help with an issue or feeling or am struggling.
Even with a sponsor and almost 4 months clean and sober, I am still filled with ego that I feel I can do it myself. I have done it that way all my life and you see where it got me!!
I have to, quite literally, remind myself that it's a dangerous path to go down, thinking I can do this alone.
I had to call my sponsor a few times these past couple weeks and she was SO glad and happy I did. It wasn't easy, but once I reached out, I felt such peace.
I, too, don't spend much time on the computer anymore, so am not around as often as I would like to.
I would spend hours in front of this thing, drinking and drugging.
Now I am out living life thanking God everyday for it.
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Old 10-08-2017, 09:08 AM
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Originally Posted by biminiblue View Post
So there are 147 members online and 2500 (yes, 2500) visitors online right now.

Prayers for the suffering alcoholics, addicted, and their loved ones. Jump in and post, it may change your life.

I guess that kind of solidifies how important it is for those of us who are in recovery to help where we can. I don't feel like I'm much help most of the time, but who knows? I do have a story and only I can tell it.

The sober side rocks.
Wow! Those are big numbers but then it is a big problem. I hope some of those 2500 make what might be 5he first step and join.
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Old 10-08-2017, 11:19 AM
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Lovely to hear from you FeelingLost.
Well done on your 4 months.
Dont be a stranger

Evening film on arte tonight is the original Blake Runner from 82.
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Old 10-08-2017, 03:40 PM
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I've had a very difficult day for reasons beyond my control entirely. I'll try to explain later perhaps. This came to my attention today which gave me a giggle. Can't beat the English for their sense of humour. I have been told I have a very dry sense of humour. I don't know exactly what that means but I thought this was hilarious. I hope you Americans can see this too.

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Old 10-08-2017, 03:43 PM
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That's hilarious, Tetra.
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