One Year
 

I've finally reached that hallowed date of one year of sobriety. It's been a rough ride, but not one without numerous rewards and joy.

I spoke to a friend last night, who I used to party hard with. He keeps trying and can't make it. He said that he was going to try again. I said that the word, try, is his problem. No trying. You have to make up your mind that you are [I]doing [/I ]it. No retreat, no surrender.

I went on to say that going on and off the booze almost makes it worse. Sure, breaks from it help the body, but the physical and emotional roller coaster is horrible. Moderation doesn't work either, at least for me. No, the monkey must be killed.

I tried AA and that was not for me. Call it white knuckle sobriety if you will, but my plan is simply this: DO NOT TAKE A DRINK. A flimsy plan, perhaps, but one that has worked.

What really did it for me is precisely what certain parties told me would not work. A new relationship. This woman I met has been my strength and my rock. I might not have made it without her. I know how badly it would hurt her if I relapsed.

With a year behind me, things are easier. My sleep is so much better. I went through the anxiety and jitters of insomnia. I slept like a rock for too long and shambled around like a zombie all day.

My thinking is clearer. I am more patient and compassionate.

I am physically so much healthier. I'm exercising and eating much, much better than I was.

I had a particularity bad drinking dream the other night, inspired I think by this anniversary. I felt sick and ashamed that I had slipped in the dream. I woke up so, so, relieved to be sober.

Life is too good. I am enjoying family, food, books, exercise...life. Things I had rejected when I was drunk.

I always thought that quitting was for other people. I would hear of individuals who were told that they had to stop drinking by their doctors. I felt that my life would be over if that happened. Of course the opposite is true.

Today I am going to take a hike in the morning coolness. I am going to a wedding this afternoon, and I won't be bothered one whit by the drinking that will surely be going on. Not tempted in the least. I will celebrate life and love with my new friends.

Thanks for listening, and God bless everyone.

Living,

Congrats!

Life not under the influence is better.

We both were addicted physically and mentally.

Now educated and over the physical hump, we can embrace our sobriety and win the battles as they present themselves.

We had a couple of fancy dinners this week and there was a small all bottle of wine everyone, except me, was sharing.

In my drinking days, I would have drunk that whole bottle in less than 10 minutes. I would have gotten wasted.

My wife says, it is ok honey, you can have a little. I said, nope. I hold myself accountable. No booze ever.

No more little slips.

Thanks.

Congratulations livinginhope :)

D

Fantastic - well done :c011:
3 months and one week behind you x

Congrats!!! Great job!!!

Congratulations livinginhope :bbk:

Awesome! I'm right behind you. October 15th I will be 60 years old and 1 year old at the same time! The 1 year means so much more! Congratulations!

Congrats living!

Congrats:You_Rock_

I love so much to read the plethora of positives, congrats!!!

Congrats, Livinghope!

One year is a MASSIVE achievement!

:bc4

Keep it on!

Congratulations, one year is AMAZING!!!!

Congrats Livinginhope! I agree with you about trying moderation. Some of us just can't do that. We progress until we need it everyday and it's back to where we started again.

I talk a good game, and I try to be positive. I hoped to have a good time this evening at the wedding, but it was terrible. I was anxious and stressed. My fiancee knew the bride and I knew no one but my fiancee. I felt out of place and extremely awkward. It was like being in a bar. The wedding was at a hotel. Everyone was drinking and they kept bringing champagne around and pouring glasses. I'd be lying if I said that I didn't want one. I said no over and over again, and I eventually felt like screaming it.

My flesh felt like it was crawling and people were asking me if I was all right. I just wanted them to leave me alone.

I've never been much of a social person, and I was mostly a solitary drinker. I get social anxiety, and I had it in spades this evening.

But I toasted the bride and groom with my glass of tea, and it will be better tomorrow.

A year is a great, amazing start, but I guess this is a lifelong struggle. I get a lot more good days than bad ones at this point, but this was a bad one.

Deep breaths, chamomile tea, an hour or so with a good book, and tomorrow will be okay.

I don't regret it. These people are important to my love, and it meant a lot for me to be there with her.

I'm sorry it was so uncomfortable, but you made it through. We know what strength it takes. Be proud of yourself. It will continue to get easier, even after a year. Congratulations to you - I'm so glad you posted.

Congratulations on 1 year ,inspiring post first thing on a Sunday morning for me.

Social anxiety has followed me around all my life and weddings are especially trying . The only part I like is the grub .
Well done for seeing it through to the end .

Congratulations on your achievement 👏

:c011:

Thank you all. I slept well, and as always when I have a bad night, things are much better in the morning and I am grateful to be sober. Life is good. Challenges? Heck yes. But I, and all of us, can meet and defeat them.

congratulations on 1 year sober!!

The wedding sounds rough. I don't like big social events either....but glad you made it through okay!