Boracraze

Welcome Rah!

rah555

I just joined this class and took some time to read all of the posts so far this month...thank you!! I am feeling so down right now. Your posts make me feel like I am not alone, like I am not a bad person, that I will feel better in a few days. I see myself in many of your posts...almost like I could have written them. I want to learn more about a recovery plan. Currently I don't have one. I'm also trying to decide if I should find a counselor or join AA.

Linners820

Was an ok day here. Unfortunately my computer pooped out on me and was a fairly pricey repair, so it's currently sitting at the place while I gather the funds to retrieve it. Had to go to the library today to get some work done, but was nice actually because unlike home there were no distractions. Made some progress on a few things.
It's been raining here all day so no walk, but last night my friend and I did about 45 min of power walking. Was so humid and it kind of felt good to break a sweat like that.
Spent the afternoon preparing some meals for the week. I made turkey chili and this Tuscan chicken skillet dish I found on a Paleo site, and I'm trying to find the motivation to chop up all my salad stuff.

I was happy to see this morning that I lost about 3 lbs in the last week.

Linners820

Hi Rah!

clearlyheaded

Hay Rah! I remember you from the March 2016 class. I've been struggling too, so I decided to join this class. Post often!

I'm keeping my mind and hands busy tonight knitting a scarf for my daughter. With how warm it's been so far this fall, I probably have plenty of time to finish it!

charliesworld

I am so tired this morning. My youngest likes having a good hour of watching TV before he has to start getting ready in the mornings but I'd been awake for a good 2/3 hours in the night and when the alarm went off it felt like I'd only been asleep 5 minutes.

Last night went well and I really enjoyed myself with the OH away. I don't know why I didn't have more sober nights alone before.

I watched Louis Theriouxs latest documentary about Herion addiction and then weirdly ended up watching a programme talking about mental health (Davina Mccalls series for those in the UK). She stated a fact that most mental health issues are showing by the age of 14 or something like that and mental health issues is young people is much higher than we know. As a child I was very shy and everything scared me. I remember a period of time where I felt sick every morning worrying about my day. Looking back now it's likely I had some kind of depression/anxiety and the chances are my drinking was a self medication for this. Having a child at 18 exacerbated everything and I drank heavily then to cope. I didn't know it wasn't normal to wake every morning feeling like life was just hard. They talked about feeling like you are treading water and that's how I've felt all my life. I wonder frequently why people put themselves through living it at all and completely relate to those who want to end it.

I'll be keeping a close eye on my children in this respect!

Horatio48

Hello Octsober friends. Hope everyone is doing well. I completed my two day trip. Being away from home and on planes/in hotels is a trigger. Stuck to my plan. Did not drink. Two weeks sober for me now. Have a great day.

corriec

Well, back on day 2 after another solitary 4 day binge. Decided to join the October group this time for some added support and fellowship. Why in the name of sobriety do we keep doing this terrible damage to ourselves??

charliesworld

Because you are trying to make yourself feel better and there is nothing wrong with that. The way you have chosen to do it however works only for the short term and has consequences.

Dee74

No one wants to be an alcoholic.
I think accepting that fact really is the first step to freedom tho

The next time you think about a drink just remind yourself that your relationship with alcohol is toxic and that you always end up in the same place...or worse.

Thinking like that just might be the buzzkill you need.

D

D

rah555

Day 2 for me. Still not feeling great. I didn't sleep well last night. I'm so upset and frustrated with myself. I feel really alone in this. I think I need to take additional steps to get ahead of this like finding a counselor or joining AA. I don't know if I would like AA. I was also thinking about going to a local bookstore to see if there are any materials that can help me build a recovery plan. I'm starting to think that my underlying issues are pretty complex and that I might need help sorting through them. So I thought a counselor might be a good idea. Any thoughts on building a recovery plan on my own, counseling or AA?

Boracraze

Welcome, Corriec. Why, indeed? Hang in there. We are all in this together.

Start of Day 3 here. Fitfull sleep last night and very strange dreams, one of which was about drinking beer at some sort of work function and then wondering if I still would be able to make the drive to see my parents. Yeah, talk about a mental obsession. The dream was probably symbolic of the neglect boozing had on close relationships in my life. Talk about carnage....ughh.

Going to follow same plan as yesterday. Going to the gym right after work and then already having a (big) healthy dinner planned helped. I also picked up some of that fancy flavored soda water (La Croix). The lime rocks, btw and really satisfied last night.

Congrats on the good progress to everyone. Keep fighting the good fight. BC.

ChloeRose63

Good Morning everyone and welcome newcomers! We are really getting together an awesome Class! Let's all have a good day and keep supporting eachother because together we are strong!!

BrightenMeUp

Hi all!
Day 7 as of this morning. Withdrawal is still in full force. Ugh. I took this week off just to try and detox and rest.
Last night was tough, this insomnia is killing me, I literally feel like a zombie. Does anyone know how long withdrawal induced insomnia usually lasts? I nearly made a beer run just to get some sleep but I was able to fight it and suffer as I lay in bed thinking.
This is a crazy roller coaster. I knew it wouldn't be easy though.

I hope everyone is doing well!! And from what iv'e read so many are which is great!!!

P.S. I spent most of the day yesterday reading on here and I found some awesome inspiration through the good and bad.

Thanks
Brighten

ChloeRose63

I drank calming teas, took valarian root capsules and magnesium to calm my nerves. I began to exercise slowly on my ellyptical and also biked so my body was doing something with all that anxiety. Stayed clear of sugar and caffeine. Drank coconut water for electrolytes. Slept great after a few days.

Linners820

Hi guys, feeling kinda craptastic today. Haven't slept well the last couple nights despite taking an epsom salt bath beforehand and applying some magnesium lotion, and listening to spa music as I try to drift off.
Been feeling really overwhelmed lately, and my head feels like it's spinning. When I feel stressed big time, my left shoulder/neck muscles freeze up, so that's been fun as well. I felt like I had a good productive day yesterday but tossed and turned all night.

Took my first dose this morning of a new anxiety med that was prescribed to me. So far not feeling much different, but it's a low dose to start. Not sure if it's the type that needs to build up in your system before you feel results.
Anyway, enough whining...it's a really beautiful day here and after I do some work at home maybe I'll head out for a walk.

Linners820

I feel like counseling is never a bad idea. I see a counselor twice a month since that's all I can currently afford. I started going several years ago and like having someone who can help me try to address and sort through past trauma so that I can keep moving forward in life. It's nice to know I have someone to go to where I can let it all out...I mean my friends are great, but I don't really want to unload on them all the time.

Zenyatta

Well it's day one for me again, sigh. I had nine days with very little trouble and yesterday drank two double scotches after a day long argument with my daughter. Soooo disapointed. I should have realized things were going too well. Sept. 30th was my first time quitting and I thought I would make it . I have been drinking daily for about 4 and half years. Actually only started drinking at all at age 45, before that I was a once or twice a year glass of wine kind of person. Never really got noticably drunk, but I could see where things were heading.
Not going to give up, though, I'm back to day one.

biminiblue

Brighten, I didn't sleep well for at least two weeks, and after that I had many nights where I considered five hours a victory.

Calming tea helped, and like Chloe I stayed away from caffeine for the first probably six months.

Exercise in the daytime helps tremendously with sleep.

I used to get up instead of lie in bed, though. I would tend to ruminate and worry if I stayed awake in bed, tossing and turning. If I got up and had some toast and a warm drink, and read a few threads on here I was always able to go back to sleep. Sometimes it's just blood sugar, and the snack took care of that.

BrandNewLife

Hi Rah! Great job on day 2, keep it going! Forgive yourself for the past and build a new future. Every small decision we make today sets us up for success.

Why not try both AA and counseling? Nothing better than lots of tools. I really like cognitive behavior therapy. She helps me build strategies and challenge my negative thinking patterns. AA would be great for the fellowship and additional support.