Breaking up with an alcoholic whose parents where alcoholics
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Join Date: Sep 2017
Posts: 1
Breaking up with an alcoholic whose parents where alcoholics
I've pretty much messed up going through this break up...
I don't feel like writing a background, because things are looking up in me having a good life again.
The thing I am struggling with at the moment:
We broke up. He started limiting his text. I didn't want to. He once said he will block me if I say he doesn't need that-****. So I said that addictions will never be right so that he will block me and I can stop sending him messages and feeling bad because I couldn't stop.
I've sent him 9 emails. One very long one. I wanted to talk it through so I can feel I can let go. Then during the last few I've started reading on adults that had alcoholic parents. I now understand that I could never talk to him, because he can't talk. It is his way of control and when we were in a long distance relationship, this was why it didn't work. He also just suddenly out of the blue started to insult and hurt me... Even if he wanted to break-up I really don't see why he needed be so insensitive and the things he said didn't even make sense. I haven't felt like sending him anything today. Feels better now that I'm reading about things. Just afraid that that I finally feel good and that things are finally making sense, won't hold. I don't even know if I want to stay away from him.
I also think there's something wrong with me sending him 9 emails...
I don't feel like writing a background, because things are looking up in me having a good life again.
The thing I am struggling with at the moment:
We broke up. He started limiting his text. I didn't want to. He once said he will block me if I say he doesn't need that-****. So I said that addictions will never be right so that he will block me and I can stop sending him messages and feeling bad because I couldn't stop.
I've sent him 9 emails. One very long one. I wanted to talk it through so I can feel I can let go. Then during the last few I've started reading on adults that had alcoholic parents. I now understand that I could never talk to him, because he can't talk. It is his way of control and when we were in a long distance relationship, this was why it didn't work. He also just suddenly out of the blue started to insult and hurt me... Even if he wanted to break-up I really don't see why he needed be so insensitive and the things he said didn't even make sense. I haven't felt like sending him anything today. Feels better now that I'm reading about things. Just afraid that that I finally feel good and that things are finally making sense, won't hold. I don't even know if I want to stay away from him.
I also think there's something wrong with me sending him 9 emails...
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,776
Hi Hazel! 
Take a look at our friends and family forum for similar perspective on being involved with an alcoholic. Lots of good insight.
https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...ly-alcoholics/
Take a look at our friends and family forum for similar perspective on being involved with an alcoholic. Lots of good insight. https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...ly-alcoholics/
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Join Date: Jan 2016
Location: Northwest
Posts: 4,215
He was nasty, insulting and cold to you.
Do his "reasons" really matter?
He's doing you a favor, although it doesn't feel like it now. Take him at his words and stop contacting him...you're far better off.
Sending you a hug.
Do his "reasons" really matter?
He's doing you a favor, although it doesn't feel like it now. Take him at his words and stop contacting him...you're far better off.
Sending you a hug.
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