Closing In on 18 Months
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 937
Closing In on 18 Months
I can hardly believe it.
Lately I have noticed a spike in anxiety and depression, so Im wondering if any of you can relate - trying very hard to be patient as my brain is probably still healing.
Stayed strong over a vacation to a place where drinking seemed to be embraced - my spouse did have some drinks while we were out at nice dinners as a family, and that was kind of challenging. The presence of my teenage son, with whom I have been very honest, helped to keep my accountable and sober.
Going to stick close to you guys for awhile. Thanks to anyone reading. You all have no idea how much of a lifeline this site is for me.
Lately I have noticed a spike in anxiety and depression, so Im wondering if any of you can relate - trying very hard to be patient as my brain is probably still healing.
Stayed strong over a vacation to a place where drinking seemed to be embraced - my spouse did have some drinks while we were out at nice dinners as a family, and that was kind of challenging. The presence of my teenage son, with whom I have been very honest, helped to keep my accountable and sober.
Going to stick close to you guys for awhile. Thanks to anyone reading. You all have no idea how much of a lifeline this site is for me.
And congrats on not giving in and drinking when others around you were. 
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 937
I've read about PAWS here - trying to figure out why I have been feeling so anxious and dark. I truly don't want a drink, truly!!! But I dont want to feel like this either.
Did any of you feel some type of crazy way around the 18 month mark?
Did any of you feel some type of crazy way around the 18 month mark?
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 937
You guys are sweet - thanks.
Anxiety and dark thoughts still around today, but I did go to bed early last night and worked out really hard tonight, so I am starting to feel more settled again.
Getting comfortable in moments or days of discomfort - ah, that is the challenge, right? But sleep and exercise help A LOT.
Anxiety and dark thoughts still around today, but I did go to bed early last night and worked out really hard tonight, so I am starting to feel more settled again.
Getting comfortable in moments or days of discomfort - ah, that is the challenge, right? But sleep and exercise help A LOT.
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 937
It is good to read the threads started by people in hangover/withdrawal to really remember how incredibly, shockingly bad it truly feels to drink.
Oh man - anyone reading in the first few days and weeks - please do whatever the hell you gotta do to not drink today. it really DOES get better!!!
Im looking forward to my second holiday season in my right mind - fully present, awake, at peace.
Oh man - anyone reading in the first few days and weeks - please do whatever the hell you gotta do to not drink today. it really DOES get better!!!
Im looking forward to my second holiday season in my right mind - fully present, awake, at peace.
I could see peace instead of this
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Canada, eh
Posts: 2,360
Nice going on 18 months!
I've been learning to stop trying to always figure out why I'm feeling a certain way. I'll look at it, and if no clear answers come, then I can try to accept that that's just the way I'm feeling right now. Just let it be. One of the reasons I drank was to not feel what I was feeling at the moment. Feelings are not me and they pass if I don't latch on to them, but still often easier said than done.
I've also learned that my mind is out to get me and for the longest time, when things were going "too" good, then it would latch on to something to get me upset and anxious. It was like always waiting for the other shoe to drop and when it didn't, I'd unconsciously create turmoil in my life. It took me quite a while to get over that.
I've been learning to stop trying to always figure out why I'm feeling a certain way. I'll look at it, and if no clear answers come, then I can try to accept that that's just the way I'm feeling right now. Just let it be. One of the reasons I drank was to not feel what I was feeling at the moment. Feelings are not me and they pass if I don't latch on to them, but still often easier said than done.
I've also learned that my mind is out to get me and for the longest time, when things were going "too" good, then it would latch on to something to get me upset and anxious. It was like always waiting for the other shoe to drop and when it didn't, I'd unconsciously create turmoil in my life. It took me quite a while to get over that.
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 937
Oh wow. Yeah I can see that. Hmmm. Ok that is interesting.
So when anxious or downright depressed/weird feelings present themselves, you just acknowlege them and then go about your day without trying to identify a reason for them?
So when anxious or downright depressed/weird feelings present themselves, you just acknowlege them and then go about your day without trying to identify a reason for them?
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Join Date: Jun 2016
Location: Adelaide, Australia
Posts: 28,657
I relate...about the same period of recovery as you. I always feel crap- BUT now I do a lot of stuff, while feeling crap, rather than just wallow. I think I feel about 0.001% better every 100 times I try to 'get happy' (without booze). Still worth it.
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