I'm a mess
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 669
I'm a mess
My life is quickly spiriling out of control. I'm at my worst right now and I don't like it. I know I'm the only one who can change it. I'm drinking more than ever and it's starting to take a toll on work.
I've gotten involved (friend only) and he's now my room mate with a guy who is trying to get clean. I've been trying to help him but it's not working since I'm a heavy drinker. I'm pretty sure we're feeding off of each other as he is now drinking a good bit too. He has legal issues and because I care about him it's stressing me out really bad.
On a positive note I'm going to a counselor who is really good and I like a lot. She's been an amazing help. Giving up drinking is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
I know this is a big ramble. I'm just so stressed and all I want to do is get lost in the bottle. I want everything to just go away.
I've gotten involved (friend only) and he's now my room mate with a guy who is trying to get clean. I've been trying to help him but it's not working since I'm a heavy drinker. I'm pretty sure we're feeding off of each other as he is now drinking a good bit too. He has legal issues and because I care about him it's stressing me out really bad.
On a positive note I'm going to a counselor who is really good and I like a lot. She's been an amazing help. Giving up drinking is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
I know this is a big ramble. I'm just so stressed and all I want to do is get lost in the bottle. I want everything to just go away.
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Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 8,674
Welcome back!
I had to do absolutely anything and everything AA told me to save my life. And 19+ mo later it is the best decision I have ever made (even more than saying "yes" to my fiance).
You CAN quit- we all need to commit and act. Best to you.
I had to do absolutely anything and everything AA told me to save my life. And 19+ mo later it is the best decision I have ever made (even more than saying "yes" to my fiance).
You CAN quit- we all need to commit and act. Best to you.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 669
He'll be gone soon. He's going to be in jail for positive drug/alcohol tests. He's in a court program. I really care about him a lot and it hurts me to think of him sitting in jail.
You've been at this for a long time - why not pull out all the stops and really do something about it? By that I mean possibly even Rehab?
Really sorry to read about your situation. I can imagine how torn you are between helping your friend (especially with his added legal problems) and wanting space to get your head together.
AA is one way I guess, but there are many other ways too and a lot of us, do nothing more than sign in to SR every day It was reading SR (even though I wasn't signing in), that has got me to 8 months and counting.
You know, your friend is going to have to give up the drink, if he gets sent to prison, so a good plan would be to help him to stop now and at the same time, it would help you to have someone going sober alongside you - whatcha think?
Just an idea and well done for posting
AA is one way I guess, but there are many other ways too and a lot of us, do nothing more than sign in to SR every day It was reading SR (even though I wasn't signing in), that has got me to 8 months and counting.
You know, your friend is going to have to give up the drink, if he gets sent to prison, so a good plan would be to help him to stop now and at the same time, it would help you to have someone going sober alongside you - whatcha think?
Just an idea and well done for posting
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 669
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 669
Really sorry to read about your situation. I can imagine how torn you are between helping your friend (especially with his added legal problems) and wanting space to get your head together.
AA is one way I guess, but there are many other ways too and a lot of us, do nothing more than sign in to SR every day It was reading SR (even though I wasn't signing in), that has got me to 8 months and counting.
You know, your friend is going to have to give up the drink, if he gets sent to prison, so a good plan would be to help him to stop now and at the same time, it would help you to have someone going sober alongside you - whatcha think?
Just an idea and well done for posting
AA is one way I guess, but there are many other ways too and a lot of us, do nothing more than sign in to SR every day It was reading SR (even though I wasn't signing in), that has got me to 8 months and counting.
You know, your friend is going to have to give up the drink, if he gets sent to prison, so a good plan would be to help him to stop now and at the same time, it would help you to have someone going sober alongside you - whatcha think?
Just an idea and well done for posting
How about you helping each other, before he goes in? I write to prisoners over there and believe me, you don't want him getting caught up 'owing' money (or worse) for illegal booze. Not trying to frighten you, but it happens
It would be a really true sign of friendship on both your parts, to help each other before he goes in
You can do this
It would be a really true sign of friendship on both your parts, to help each other before he goes in
You can do this
Sinderos, the Salvation Army offers free rehab:
http://satruck.org/national-rehabilitation
I think you need to really focus on yourself right now and not get too involved trying to help and worrying about your friend. You can do this.
http://satruck.org/national-rehabilitation
I think you need to really focus on yourself right now and not get too involved trying to help and worrying about your friend. You can do this.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 669
Sinderos, the Salvation Army offers free rehab:
http://satruck.org/national-rehabilitation
I think you need to really focus on yourself right now and not get too involved trying to help and worrying about your friend. You can do this.
http://satruck.org/national-rehabilitation
I think you need to really focus on yourself right now and not get too involved trying to help and worrying about your friend. You can do this.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 669
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Join Date: Jun 2015
Location: PA
Posts: 588
Have you looked into outpatient? I do an evening Inetensive Outpatient (IOP) that is awesome. Pair that with 2-3 AA meetings per week and I am sober 52 days today.
It’s good to care about your friend but you’re not useful to him not sober and vice versa, enabling each other. You need to focus on your recovery above all else right now.
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Join Date: Jul 2016
Location: upstate new york
Posts: 131
I know this may sound harsh but your friend going to jail may be just what he needs.
I have a very close friend who after his 5th dwi got to spend 2 yrs. in prison. he was never in an accident or hurt anyone and never cost an insurance company a penny. at the time we all said how he got screwed and how much that sucked. while in he worked the program of AA tho never followed up when released. that was 14 yrs. ago and to this day he hasn't had a drink. he is very successful and living a good life. now we all say it was the best thing to happen to him. maybe you could hope for the same for your friend and most importantly look out for yourself.
I have a very close friend who after his 5th dwi got to spend 2 yrs. in prison. he was never in an accident or hurt anyone and never cost an insurance company a penny. at the time we all said how he got screwed and how much that sucked. while in he worked the program of AA tho never followed up when released. that was 14 yrs. ago and to this day he hasn't had a drink. he is very successful and living a good life. now we all say it was the best thing to happen to him. maybe you could hope for the same for your friend and most importantly look out for yourself.
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Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 3,293
It seems like you are projecting a bit, which could be interpreted as reasons or excuses “why not”.
Have you looked into outpatient? I do an evening Inetensive Outpatient (IOP) that is awesome. Pair that with 2-3 AA meetings per week and I am sober 52 days today.
It’s good to care about your friend but you’re not useful to him not sober and vice versa, enabling each other. You need to focus on your recovery above all else right now.
Have you looked into outpatient? I do an evening Inetensive Outpatient (IOP) that is awesome. Pair that with 2-3 AA meetings per week and I am sober 52 days today.
It’s good to care about your friend but you’re not useful to him not sober and vice versa, enabling each other. You need to focus on your recovery above all else right now.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2017
Posts: 51
Hard times are a reminder that better times are too come that things can only go up from here. But you have too make some very serious decisions an that means putting urself and ur recovery first.
You obviously have such a kind heart that hurts for those who hurt and I think that is admirable. Be strong and be honest with yourself for today for the next hours until u lay ur head down for the night.
Sending you strength and love
You obviously have such a kind heart that hurts for those who hurt and I think that is admirable. Be strong and be honest with yourself for today for the next hours until u lay ur head down for the night.
Sending you strength and love
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