notgonnastoptry

I would just like to thank my former alcoholic self for creating a world of hurt in every way. I've already complained about the physical damage, personal damage, etc.

Now, it's time to face down the financial wreak I created. What's maddening is none of this needed to happen. Income hasn't changed (it's gone up slightly) and there was never any shortage of money, even with the drinking.

There was also no shortage of idiocy and drunken laziness.

I'm just starting to face down my carelessness and some isn't going away any time soon.

There was a time I just didn't pay my rent. Oh, yeah. The money was in the bank. I just didn't feel like turning on the computer or getting off whatever website I was drunkenly starring into.

That same month, there were the warning notices. Those were ignored. I finally snapped into action after they started the eviction process.

Paid immediately when I was jolted back to reality. But, it's still on my record. It wasn't a judgment and it was dismissed, but it shows up.

Then there were the many times I let 20 dollar minimum payments go months in. Those show up as 120 days late. Derogatory.

I can't forget about the tiny medical bill that ballooned because calling insurance would have gotten in the way of drinking. I was able to pay for deletion on that one. Haven't been so lucky with the others.

There was the time I opted for a charge off (I barely remember these details, to be honest).

Then there was the other time I didn't pay firestone, they charged off, and get this I PAID THEM AND DIDN'T ASK FOR A DELETE. Lucky me, a paid chargeoff.

So, yeah, while we had all of the money to pay all of this, I selected not to be bothered with so many of these things. Yet, I somehow managed to function highly at work. Why I couldn't have just held out for another hour and pay my god&&&& bills, I don't know.

One of the more ridiculous but very costly consequences that has lasting effects.

Renvate

Notgonnastoptrying, I can relate to this.

You say highly effective at work? Well I was also, but i sucked at everything else. but it was because I was putting all the energy I had left into work and drinking. And no energy what so ever on anything else. Just home time, drink, and bed.

Food can be taken care with delivery, just gotta clean the house out or take out the rubbish at least and Iam set (seems to be a common trait among daily drinkers) I was set for anything aslong as I had some drink.

I was only functioning work, and that's it. The i asked myself "how do people go to gym after work?"

"How do people juggle families, mortgage, work, dinner, relationships, financial stress, non predictable events?"

"How do people go through stressful situations?"

The answer was - they don't drink like I do.

Dee74

Hi notgonnastoptry
yeah it took me about a year to get solvent again. It took me that long to pay off my various creditors week by week, payment plans, etc.

It wasn't fun, but it was another reminder of why I had to change my life.

Look back now, I'm surprised it took so short a time really.

Stay sober and It will be over for you too, sooner rather than later

D

MythOfSisyphus

I know how you feel, notgonnastoptry! I would often pay stuff late but generally not late enough to get reported. Like you said, I simply didn't care- if I was drinking I wasn't gonna bother stopping long enough to get online and do a payment. When you're drunk you just don't acknowledge that consequences exist. Or at least I didn't.

red3215

Yes I relate to making horrible unnecesary choices that got me into a financial mess I still haven't crawled out of completely. But alcoholism was only one contributor. Depression also played a role. There may have been some of that in your case as well.
It might seem like you've screwed your life up but if you stay sober, you should eventually get things put back together again. Not everyone notices great changes with sobriety right away, but they will come.

notgonnastoptry

My credit was at 570 last year at this time.

It's now 650, but that charge off is dragging it down. We could have easily paid it, but I didn't care at the time. Same with all of the other bills. It wasn't like we didn't have the money sitting there, doing nothing.

The eviction is the worst. For whatever reason, when I got the threat that they had started, I immediately appeared with a money order and was slammed with court fees. Still there, though. My husband has to rent everything and also buy the cars in his name.

Yes--I think I did put all my energy into work and when I returned from there, I totally turned off. I did manage to pay discover and amex on time (I'm sure I was late, but never in the reporting territory). With others, I was.

August252015

Familiar story to me too. All I have left is a decently large old tax bill which (thanks to my fiancé) can be tackled soon. I had to get on payment plans for medical bills, some as small as $10/mo so I knew I could afford it. Fortunately by being honest with each debtor about why I had gotten so messed up meant they made the debt interest free and at reasonable payment amounts.

I also had some legal fees along the way that my parents paid.

Getting past my shame and lack of motivation took a minute but by about 100 days I had sat down and listed everything I had to address, and the feeling of accomplishment I felt was awesome.

My credit is not good still but I have been able to get my own credit card.

Life wreckage when drinking can have so many faces and be wide reaching- for the non reasons you mention (I went a long time just not opening mail!) and it takes time for some of us to get back to par and move up.

Regretting the past doesn't help and dealing with the reality is the only way I know to get through The rebuilding.

Mountainmanbob

The Liquid Devil had his way with us
and we put many important things off till tomorrow.

Some who sober up call it the "wreckage of our past."

Got much, much better once we stayed sober.

M-Bob

Anna

The good news is that you have a job that will allow you to begin to clean up the debts and other financial messes. Try to turn this around and be grateful that you are able to do that. You can get through this.

thomas11

Less than a year ago I was served with papers that my house was going to be auctioned off and I owed a ton of money is loans. Today the debt from the loans has been settled and is off my credit report, as of last week I have more money in the bank than I have ever had in my lifetime. Sobriety helped achieve these things. Like you, when drinking I would neglect everything. Pretend the bad stuff wasn't there. It just got worse. I have a fresh start on life and I plan to take full advantage of it.

scintillady

I know exactly how you feel. I had to cash out my retirement fund to pay off my debt I incurred from my DUI. I paid over $10,000.00 and am still paying more for insurance because of it. I also had to switch from my day job to working overnights because overnight staff doesn't have to drive clients. At least that was an option so I didn't lose my job, which probably would have happened if I was not such a valuable employee otherwise. I also went through a period of not opening my mail, which resulted in late fees and judgments against me. I am doing better financially but will be paying off a huge tax debt for the rest of my life, probably, since I am 60 years old and the minimum payments barely cover the interest I get charged every month. I still struggle with relapses every once in awhile, but luckily I have come to my senses and pay my bills on time and never drive if I have been drinking. Antabuse has been a lifesaver for me as long as I have the discipline to take it regularly. It takes away the option of drinking completely, and has afforded me more sober time than I have ever had in my adult lifetime. Another advantage to being sober is that I can say yes to all of the last minute overtime that is offered. I couldn't do that when I was drinking, and that has helped financially. Obviously, not buying wine has helped financially also.

Soberandhealthy

thank you scintillady you inspired me!

Yes so much wreckage its crazy i though getting sober means my life will be perfect but no,all kind of problems were here waiting for me.

i owe so much money even tax money which i never thought i would get myself into. so sad but I'm here now and i will clean this up,you will too

Bunny211

Yes. I finally dealt with it at around a year sober. I called American Consumer Credit and they worked out a plan with my credit card companies so that I could pay off my cards. They helped me create a budget and manage my finances. I was in a huge financial pickle when I finally got sober. The way out, like anything, is action. ACC is a good company to work with. I suggest giving them a call.

notgonnastoptry

Thank you, all.

What is unrelentingly sad is we don't have much debt. The things I defaulted on were stupid CC payments--like 30 dollars a month, minimum! Those turned into reported "lates" and then I just decided not to pay Firestone money I had and I also decided to charge off a smallish credit card. Have no idea what my problem was. Oh, I do. Drunk. Not opening mail and not wanting my husband involved. He did the taxes or we'd be in deeper trouble.

I just have to wait it out until these derogatory marks fad over time, drop, or god knows. The eviction thing is going to be pulled at every potential rent. so glad my husband and i only put one name on the apartments. I also live in multiple places, so while that made things complicated, it's really no excuse.

I also didn't open mail, take phone calls, deal with any of this. In fact, at one of my residences, I didn't even bother to acquire mailbox keys (this really didn't matter, actually since they usually didn't mail stuff, but there were a few times that hurt me, too).

LovePeaceSushi

My AH is guilty of those types of things, too....it's been baffling. The money is there.....why wait until it's late and then there are fees on top of the original amount owed? His credit is crap and it's over stupid stuff like $20 medical payments that he just kept not paying, thinking that insurance would run it again and cover it. The house note, until I started paying it, was always late. Basically all our bills were paid at the end of the month, vs. the beginning. I've taken it upon myself to pay everything online at the beginning of the month. I'm not sure he's even noticed.

Maybe just like the alcoholism itself, it's just another self-defeating behavior. What purpose it serves, I have no idea.

FreeOwl

for decades I rode the razor's edge of financial ruin and created a mountain of debt and issues to cope with.

in sobriety, that got dealt with relatively quickly. within about a year and a half I began to get control of debt. I fixed my credit rating. I bought a second home. I have been in much better position and much more responsible ever since.

I still have to wrestle sometimes with financial discipline and habits. It turns out that all those years of neglect of basic responsibilities means that even in sobriety I have "growing up" to do..... but it gets a lot better. Keep at it, you'll be OK.

August252015

^^ Your last two sentences are key- it doesn't serve any GOOD purpose to do any of our self-defeating behavior. We do it for various reasons the alcoholic mind comes up with, IME - most just because I wanted to keep drinking and have things "be handled." The opposite of what a sober mind, grown adult, decent person does or expects.

FreeOwl

on a related note.... the fallout of DUI's still plagues me.

I am working my way toward becoming eligible some day to go to Canada. With two DUIs, I am criminally ineligible.

It took me several years to get my pilot's license re-cleared and catch up on my responsibility for reporting and medical certification after those DUIs as well.

I was ineligible to be a mentor for Big Brothers because of the DUIs. I am now eligible again but for a period of years I was unable to give in service in that way (and in others) because of my legal background due to drinking.

Countless thousands.... probably countless tens or even hundreds of thousands of dollars were wasted on alcohol, drugs and the related financial impact of alcohol and drugs over the years.....

But, the great news is, bit-by-bit, we overcome it all.

MrsLecter

I can relate, I've been dealing with that today. I've had to write to allllll my creditors and propose monthly payment plans. I lost my job, took out loans to pay my rent and for booze, got deeper in the hole and now I'm dealing with it.
Thing is, it happened and the fact that you're pushing forward is more than a lot of people ever do. It's brave to face this.

notgonnastoptry

Well, I read somewhere here that we can explain to the creditors. In my case, I have a bunch of hospital bills to prove I was there for treatment. Firestone and Chase may work with me (I don't know yet) since I was late at the very climax of the disease.

Then again, it's not like cancer where people feel empathy for you and your situation. I did not say it was alcoholism and the hospital ledger doesn't show that either. Might work in helping me negotiate my judgment which, btw, I put in 25% of the balance offer just a few hours ago. They'll probably laugh at it, but I should include my hospital bills.