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Day 1 AGAIN. New to this site. Not even sure what I'm looking for? Advice? Support? Sober tips?



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Day 1 AGAIN. New to this site. Not even sure what I'm looking for? Advice? Support? Sober tips?

Old 09-16-2017, 08:07 PM
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Day 1 AGAIN. New to this site. Not even sure what I'm looking for? Advice? Support? Sober tips?

I'm new to this site and I posted a week ago then relapsed. My determination to quit drinking waxes and wanes. In the morning it seems like I'm ready to take on sobriety. Then by the afternoon I feel sick and itchy and so I drink. And it's never one drink. Oh no.

How do people make the big effort to one day stop? How do you stick to your word? How do you tell yourself that you no longer drink? I stopped for 12 weeks last year. Why can't I do it again?
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Old 09-16-2017, 08:14 PM
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Glad you are here 50! It does seem to get harder with each cycle of starting and stopping. The morning was always shameful for me, but hen yes the urge to drink always showed up. A big part of stopping is getting to the point where you will do whatever it takes. I also believe that one drink is too many for me. None is the only answer for me because one is never just one. I knew I couldn't quit alone. That is why I came and why I still am here. This is a great community to work out sobriety. I hope you read, post and learn skills to get sober!
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Old 09-16-2017, 08:18 PM
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My best friend died. I didn't want to die. I was tired of lying to myself and wife, worrying about my health, being hungover and bloated, mentally exhausted, tired of the whole game.
I stopped because deep down inside me, i wanted to get off the merry go round.
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Old 09-16-2017, 08:20 PM
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Hi 50nFab

yeah it took a lot of work for me to stay sober.

I not only had to post here once, I needed to do it multiple times a day.
I needed to ask for help before I drank again and I needed to see what others were doing to stay sober.

I really needed a plan to work out what changes I needed to make and the kinds of support I needed to help me make those changes.

https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...ery-plans.html (Psst...wanna know why I'm always recommending recovery plans?)

Like I said a lot of work but not onerous if you really want change.

You'll get out of your recovery what you put into it

D
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Old 09-16-2017, 08:50 PM
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Originally Posted by 50nFab View Post

How do people make the big effort to one day stop? How do you stick to your word? How do you tell yourself that you no longer drink?
by thinking about the consequence of 1 drink

its the 1st drink that gets us drunk not the 10th, 20th etc

my choice is not taking 1 drink OR all the loss, tragedy and misery that this disease always brings

God bless

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Old 09-16-2017, 11:07 PM
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I started going to AA meetings and working with a sponsor. Prior to that I couldn't stop.
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Old 09-17-2017, 01:29 AM
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Thank you all. I need sober association, that's for sure. AA seems to be the only place where I'm going to find it. The whole world seems drunk. Or is that just my perception? I mean, to me it seems like it's everywhere. I used alcohol to numb some feelings and escape. Well, now I'm 50 and I don't need to run from anything anymore. Wish I could just grow up and stop it.
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Old 09-17-2017, 02:20 AM
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when I was a drinker everyone drank...now I'm not, I see non drinkers everywhere

D
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Old 09-17-2017, 04:12 AM
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Welcome. Like others said, you have to decide you want to be sober- more than you want to drink- and a plan of getting and STAYING sober (not just not drinking!) is key to long term success.

My path is also AA and I have found my thinking entirely changed since I committed to being sober and working my program. There is so much to this world- and now, my life- than alcohol and now I have the privilege of discovering it.

You can do it.
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Old 09-17-2017, 04:39 AM
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Had started and stopped. But this time I've stopped because the cost in terms of what alcohol has taken from me has got to the point where it's "enough. I'm sick of this". Now's it's about replacing and rebuilding a new life. Never want to go back there. It's taken time and loss but it had to happen to help wake me up.
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Old 09-17-2017, 07:49 PM
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Alcohol is a thief..........it's not welcome anymore.
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Old 09-17-2017, 08:04 PM
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After repeating that cycle a thousand times (at least), you finally begin to realize it's a lie. That little voice in the evening telling you it's ok to have a few, no big deal - You finally accept where it leads. It's like banging your head against to wall and expecting not to come down with a headache. Then you finally wake up and finally realize what's causing it.

Sick and tired of being sick and tired.
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Old 09-18-2017, 12:02 AM
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So many wise posts already. I definitely felt very much like you do now for a long time. I'd wake up each morning silently or sometimes outwardly cursing myself for having drank the night before. I would decide I wasn't going to drink that day, then as the day wore on, I started to feel a little better, and by the end of the day I was stopping by to start the whole viscous circle again.

I have been off of this insane roller coaster for 20 and a half months now, and life is so much better with a clear head. Even my most difficult days, and there have been some very tough ones, are much better sober.

I still read and post here every day. My go to is the 24 hour thread, it's a wonderfully supportive community you should join us, and commit to the next 24 hours sober, then do the same thing the next day, and the day after that...

The monthly classes are also very supportive, you should join the September 2017 class.

Looking forward to seeing you on here!
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Old 09-18-2017, 12:55 AM
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I'm just sick and tired of feeling like death after drinking . I'm 60 and will not suffer any more through self induced torture. Quit feeling like I've lost something and started feeling like I've given myself extra quality living by simply not drinking alcohol .
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Old 09-18-2017, 01:56 AM
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Go to meetings. Use sr read as much as you can. I know how you feel that awful hopeless feeling. Regret shame anxiety feeling sick n tired. That's what drink leads to every single time. I play the tape forward remembering how I feel after drinking how much suffering I go through. All the best alcohol is poison it's a lie and it ruins everything good in life
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Old 09-18-2017, 08:07 AM
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Hello 50, I quit drinking because of health reasons and I felt that drinking had become my main priority in life. It was affecting my health, family and work. It was time to say goodbye. Cutting back never worked for me. As so many people here have said it's the first drink. I try not to look at it as quitting forever. Although that's my goal. I take it as the saying goes one day at a time.
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