Am I White Knuckling it? - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information
Go Back   SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information >
Register Blogs FAQ Members List Calendar Arcade Mark Forums Read





Reply
LinkBack Thread Tools
Old 09-13-2017, 05:21 PM   #1 (permalink)
Member
 

Join Date: Sep 2017
Posts: 1
Post

Am I White Knuckling it?


Hello,

I recently celebrated 11 months clean and sober. In this past year, I went back to school, got a new career, got my family back and some trust and dignity within myself back.

I attend AA but still feel like I'm hanging on for dear life in sobriety even though all these positive things are the result of my sobriety. I still feel depressed and struggle with a lot of anxiety. I am wondering if I am white knuckling it and if I am, how do I stop? I don't really know what to do. Any help is appreciated.
brianmsj is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to brianmsj For This Useful Post:
Gottalife (09-13-2017), Mags1 (09-13-2017), thomas11 (09-14-2017)
Old 09-13-2017, 05:41 PM   #2 (permalink)
Administrator
 
Dee74's Avatar
 

Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 181,478
Blog Entries: 1
Hi and welcome brainmsj

I wonder if you've ever seen a Dr about this depression and anxiety - if not would you maybe consider it now?

D
__________________
Dee74 is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Dee74 For This Useful Post:
Mags1 (09-13-2017), MindfulMan (09-13-2017)
Old 09-13-2017, 09:02 PM   #3 (permalink)
12 Step Recovered Alcoholic
 
Gottalife's Avatar
 

Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Thailand
Posts: 6,465
What's happening with the steps?
__________________
Mike.

What you most need will be found where you least want to look
All BB quotes from 1st Edition.
Gottalife is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to Gottalife For This Useful Post:
August252015 (09-14-2017), Berrybean (09-13-2017), Pathwaytofree (09-15-2017), tomsteve (09-14-2017)
Old 09-13-2017, 10:00 PM   #4 (permalink)
Member
 

Join Date: Jun 2015
Location: PA
Posts: 588
Are you just attending, or did you get a sponsor and start working steps?
axeman5971 is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to axeman5971 For This Useful Post:
August252015 (09-14-2017), Berrybean (09-13-2017), Outonthetiles (09-13-2017), Pathwaytofree (09-15-2017), tomsteve (09-14-2017)
Old 09-13-2017, 10:43 PM   #5 (permalink)
Member
 
Mags1's Avatar
 

Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: UK
Posts: 12,278
Blog Entries: 1
Hi brianm, I suffered with anxieties when I stopped but to be honest, they were there before and the booze just masked them away. I had to learn to live sober and I actually got put on mild anti depressants, which for me helped enormously.

Congratulations on 11 months sober!
__________________
Sober Date Twentieth of July 2013

What day is it today?”asked Pooh.
“It’s today.” squeaked Piglet.
“My favourite day.” said Pooh
. ❤️
Mags1 is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to Mags1 For This Useful Post:
DarklingSong (09-14-2017)
Old 09-13-2017, 11:40 PM   #6 (permalink)
Member
 
rainyengland's Avatar
 

Join Date: Nov 2012
Posts: 692
I'd echo comments about seeing your doc , I was exactly the same

No shame in asking for help 👍🏻😊
rainyengland is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to rainyengland For This Useful Post:
DarklingSong (09-14-2017), Mags1 (09-14-2017), MindfulMan (09-14-2017)
Old 09-14-2017, 12:39 AM   #7 (permalink)
Member
 

Join Date: Aug 2015
Posts: 1,518
Hi, Anxiety is so common with addictions . For me I had problems with anxiety most of my adult life and alcohol tempoarily gave me relief . Now I am living life on lifes terms and working hard at accepting the term anxiety is the bodys natural defence mechanism gone out of whack and ( in my own words) needs to be reset . If I understand there is no disease , no mental illness( had labwork done and thorough checkover) and that anxiety symptoms are caused by my own thinking flooding my body with adrenalin and other chemicals in order to fight or flee while there is no need( fear where tehre is nothing to fear) I am on the way to calmness . This is what I am being taught and much much more and for me its working .

A visit to your doc is a great idea .

For me tablets never worked but slowly I am improving by UNDERSTANDING how exccess anxiety is caused .


Wishing you well.
hpdw is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to hpdw For This Useful Post:
DarklingSong (09-14-2017), Mags1 (09-14-2017), Pathwaytofree (09-15-2017)
Old 09-14-2017, 01:11 AM   #8 (permalink)
No Dogma Please
 
MindfulMan's Avatar
 

Join Date: Jul 2017
Location: SoCal
Posts: 2,561
Cognitive therapy and antidepressants has been working for me. AA meetings for community and fellowship, no sponsor or step work yet, perhaps never, but for some it does help with anxiety. Also where there's anxiety there is often depression. Many if not most addicts have some underlying mood disorders and/or unresolved anxiety that is harshly revealed when we are no longer masking them with our DOCs.

Psychodynamic therapy can be very useful, particularly following a round of addiction focused cognitive therapy. Yoga, mindfulness and meditation practices can be hugely helpful against anxiety, and good diet and exercise contributes as well.

You are far from alone. I'd say explore all options and see what works for you.
MindfulMan is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to MindfulMan For This Useful Post:
DarklingSong (09-16-2017), Mags1 (09-14-2017), Pathwaytofree (09-15-2017)
Old 09-14-2017, 01:18 AM   #9 (permalink)
Member
 

Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: FRANCE
Posts: 4,373
Blog Entries: 2
Im not a happy camper everyday and I have to say I have crippling anxiety (i mean crippling, bordrline agoraphobic) Some days are better than others.
Did you try exercising ?
Take care.
theVman31 is online now   Reply With Quote
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to theVman31 For This Useful Post:
DarklingSong (09-16-2017), Mags1 (09-14-2017)
Old 09-14-2017, 03:59 AM   #10 (permalink)
Member
 
August252015's Avatar
 

Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 8,427
Doctor care, after complete commitment to AA has worked for me. Anxiety was an underlying/lifelong thing for me, too, so meds for that....but the key was truly committing to AA, working the steps, having a great sponsor, building a sober network, yep all of that, just like folks say!
__________________
August

Quote:
"Sometimes, I've believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast." - Alice in Wonderland
August252015 is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to August252015 For This Useful Post:
Mags1 (09-14-2017), MindfulMan (09-14-2017), Pathwaytofree (09-14-2017), tomsteve (09-14-2017)
Old 09-14-2017, 11:40 AM   #11 (permalink)
Member
 
thomas11's Avatar
 

Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: MN
Posts: 8,179
Our brains are such complex organs, sometimes even after being sober we have underlying issues that need to be addressed. I have an underlying issue that I take medication for daily, it was the best decision of my life. Not saying that's the answer for you, but finding out the source of your anxiety and depression is a worthwhile endeavor.
thomas11 is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to thomas11 For This Useful Post:
Mags1 (09-14-2017), Pathwaytofree (09-14-2017)
Old 09-14-2017, 11:45 AM   #12 (permalink)
Guest
 
Pathwaytofree's Avatar
 

Join Date: Jul 2017
Posts: 1,271
Quote:
Originally Posted by brianmsj View Post
Hello,

I recently celebrated 11 months clean and sober. In this past year, I went back to school, got a new career, got my family back and some trust and dignity within myself back.
First, congratulations on making all those amazing life changes!!!

Quote:
I attend AA but still feel like I'm hanging on for dear life in sobriety even though all these positive things are the result of my sobriety. I still feel depressed and struggle with a lot of anxiety. I am wondering if I am white knuckling it and if I am, how do I stop? I don't really know what to do. Any help is appreciated.
It's been my experience that just changing external circumstances wouldn't keep me sober, even though they added to my recovery. It was also my experience that just attending AA wasn't enough to recover. I had to get a sponsor to take me through the 12 steps for the internal stuff to be resolved.

Once out on the other side of the step work, "the problem has been removed" as it says in the big book. I can't remember the last time I white knuckled not drinking and I am so grateful for that.
Pathwaytofree is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to Pathwaytofree For This Useful Post:
Gottalife (09-14-2017), Mags1 (09-14-2017), tomsteve (09-14-2017)
Old 09-14-2017, 01:18 PM   #13 (permalink)
Member
 
tomsteve's Avatar
 

Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: northern michigan. not the U.P.
Posts: 15,284
going to meetings and not drinking dont treat alcoholism.
to stop whats going on could be as simple as getting into action with the steps.

if nothing changes then nothing changes
__________________
all big book quotes from 1st edition
tomsteve is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to tomsteve For This Useful Post:
Gottalife (09-14-2017), Mags1 (09-14-2017), Pathwaytofree (09-14-2017)
Old 09-14-2017, 04:22 PM   #14 (permalink)
Member
 

Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Pacific Northwest
Posts: 632
Try helping alcoholics with less sober time than yourself.
Soberween is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Soberween For This Useful Post:
Gottalife (09-14-2017), tomsteve (09-14-2017)
Old 09-15-2017, 08:06 PM   #15 (permalink)
Member
 

Join Date: Jun 2015
Location: PA
Posts: 588
I joined a home group today. 3 meetings a week plus 3 nights of IOP. It's 12 hours a week and I wouldn't trade it for a thing. I am so happy and grateful for AA and eager to get deeper into step work.
axeman5971 is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off




All times are GMT -7. The time now is 03:24 AM.