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Being a friend to my recovering addict friend

Old 09-13-2017, 12:43 PM
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Being a friend to my recovering addict friend

Hi everyone, I'm new to this I don't normally do this but I felt it was necessary because I love my friend and want to help support her in the best way.

Me and my friend are very close I've known her for a couple months and I really like her as a person and I remember one day she would all of sudden just stop texting me and I wouldn't hear from her til the next day. I think she finally felt guilty about ignoring me and she just came out and told me about her addiction to coke.

When she came out and told me I didn't look at her any different I still loved her and cared for her and things started getting a lil serious and I started falling for her and a couple months later she ended up going to rehab for a 6 month program but got kicked out for fraternizing with a fellow housemate.

When she told me I felt kind of bad because I had feelings for her but I kept it inside because I didn't want my feelings for her to interfere with her recovery I wanted her to focus on her self first , but recently I told her I had feelings for her which was dumb of me to do because she is still in early recovery and I saw on her phone that she apparently talking to someone else too.

Like she would flirt with me and flirt with me and I guess I brought it up to her one night what I had saw and I told her I think she would part ways and that I'll still love and care for her and she talks about how she really loves me and cares for me , but I don't know what to believe I feel like she doesn't care.

Now I feel guilty about telling her we should part because I told her I was gonna be that supportive friend to her and she would always text me when she had good news about her recovery and how good she's doing and know I'm confused and don't know what to do anymore .. plzzz help
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Old 09-13-2017, 01:07 PM
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Hi.
I feel badly for you bc you clearly are interested in her but my advice to you is to run. She's new in recovery. She has a ton if options for support with people who understand her disease and she really needs to focus on sobriety right now.
In time, you will get over her and find someone meant for you.
I honestly do not think that I could date someone who is not an alcoholic or addict at this point. No one quite understands me like my people. And I don't need to be around people who can recreationally drinking or take a toke or two. Horrible idea for someone like me.
This is probably not what you want to hear, but it's very honest and sincerely in both of your best interest.
GL,
Jules
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