eve123

Help my illness is all over me need support scared of picking up

doggonecarl

Sounds like local support would help. I've seen you mention a sponsor in post. Call you call? Get to a meeting?

eve123

Sponsors at work can't get to mtg no childcare. This is hard

teaorcoffee

Stay here, keep posting your feelings. Sometimes it's an hour or even a minute at a time.

tomsteve

got other numbers to members of AA?
got a hotline number?
got your big book you can pick up and read?
how about lookin up some AA speakers online to listen to?
how about practicing the first 3 steps?
wheres your HP?
yes, it is hard, but not impossible.

thomas11

Take action Hedd, whatever it takes. Keep posting here often if you need to. Don't drink, i know its hard, but its not worth it. No way.

eve123

Feel angry upset fed up lonley bla bla bla. Just want time out. Not going too hate this illness my emotions all over the place

Berrybean

Have you checked your HALT triggers?

Hungry Angry Lonely Tired.

Any one of them can cause problems, but 2 or more can make for very uncomfortable sobriety.

BB

AnvilheadII

depending on your location, you could call the Crisis Line and talk to someone. that's what they are there for.

CRISIS LINES - US
24/7/365 Crisis Call Center Hotline:
(775) 784-8090, or 1 (800) 273-8255

can you make yourself a meal? take a nap?

tomsteve

do you WANT to keep feeling that way or do you want to get into solutions?
when i stopped living in the problem and began living in the solution, the problem went away.

Men and women drink essentially because they like the effect produced by alcohol. The sensation is so elusive that, while they admit it is injurious, they cannot after a time differentiate the true from the false. To them, their alcoholic life seems the only normal one. They are restless, irritable and discontented, unless they can again experience the sense of ease and comfort which comes at once by taking a few drinks-drinks which they see others taking with impunity. After they have succumbed to the desire again, as so many do, and the phenomenon of craving develops, they pass through the well-known stages of a spree, emerging remorseful, with a firm resolution not to drink again. This is repeated over and over, and unless this person can experience an entire psychic change there is very little hope of his recovery.
On the other hand-and strange as this may seem to those who do not understand-once a psychic change has occurred, the very same person who seemed doomed, who had so many problems he despaired of ever solving them, suddenly finds himself easily able to control his desire for alcohol, the only effort necessary being that required to follow a few simple rules.

ardy

like tomsteve said its so true.. hugs hugs hugs. and prayers..

eve123

Thanks all to Steve yes I do want to live in solution but can't seem to get into grips with the programme. I feel so **** I'm scared I'm gona drink

Anna

Head, stay around the boards here until you are able to talk to your sponsor or take a break. I know how difficult it can seem at a time like this, but don't let go. You will get through this.

Hevyn

Hedd, You're definitely not alone. Emotions all over the place - that's normal. I felt scared & panicky when I first came here too. Things got so much better when I got some sober time behind me. You're among friends - I hope you'll keep reading & posting.

tomsteve

that,imo, is a healthy fear- something i used early on to keep me trudging the road of happy destiny.
it helped me focus on the 1st step and eventually accepted the 1st step.
for some reason, and i dont know why, but when i accepted the 1st step, there was a sense of......hhhhmmmm........ relief?? that came into me.

D122y

Hedd,

Start doing push ups until you can't do anymore. Then do sit ups till you can't do anymore. Then do squats...then go back to push ups.

Your body will take over your mind. You stress will be nulled out.

Do that for about 10 minutes.

You get adrenaline and endorphins. Natural high.

Thanks.

PhoenixJ

Post here- lots. Read stories here. There are thousands. Join lots of threads. Walk. Paint. Journal. BREATHE- mindful. Clean your living space. Read a book. Go to the library. Plan and cook a cheap- but different meal. Post here when you do not want to- 'specially when you do not want to.
Empathy and support to you

Dee74

Hows it going now Hedd?

D