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WEEKENDERS - Running the Weekend Gauntlett 8-10th Sept

Old 09-07-2017, 02:54 AM
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saoutchik
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WEEKENDERS - Running the Weekend Gauntlett 8-10th Sept

This thread is about offering extra support to drugs and/or alcohol abusers at the weekend because the weekend is often the time of the week when our lying AV (Addict or Alcoholic Voice) says that getting wasted is "totally acceptable."

One of the many lies I used to tell myself was that I had a tough week and so would drink this weekend but quit on Monday. Just writing this here is making me smile. It was a lie I told so many times I could have run for office.

The thing is how often on a Monday morning have you ever thought "I'm really glad I spent the last two and a half days wasted, hungover and blacked out?"

Our culture does not make it easy on non-drinkers. At first stepping off that spiral can seem daunting and disorientating, so much extra time for a start but hang in there. The feeling of achievement you get from a sober weekend is something you will never get from a bottle or a pill.

I mentioned our lying AV at the top of this post. Ultimately it wants us dead and unfortunately is all to often successful but it can only do so with our help. This weekend tell it to.......... insert the words you feel are appropriate.
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Old 09-07-2017, 03:04 AM
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shotgun

Yep, I remember those days.
Thanks forthe reminder, sao
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Old 09-07-2017, 03:31 AM
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Good to see you Lunar. Congratulations on shotgun!
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Old 09-07-2017, 03:39 AM
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congrats on shotgun lunar.
Strange, but I have no idea where all that extra time has gone? Yea at first they seemed to drag 'cause I didn't know what to do with myself and sure, I'm getting things done but.... I wish the days didn't go by so fast.
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Old 09-07-2017, 03:39 AM
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Howdy saou, et al. Thanks for keeping the weekender alive and well!
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Old 09-07-2017, 04:35 AM
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I am in!

Thank you, Sao, for the intro.

Definitely don't miss those hangovers, regrets, shame, guilt, comatose mornings, and endless "why agains".

As for how to fill in all this liberated time - it's just a question of time and dedication. There are thousands things to do on a weekend instead of drinking. Shame that modern cultures tries to convince us otherwise.

Have a good day, weekenders.
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Old 09-07-2017, 04:53 AM
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Good to see you Lorax!
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Old 09-07-2017, 05:56 AM
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Great intro, Sao!

Congratulations on shotgun, Lunar!

I'm in!
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Old 09-07-2017, 06:41 AM
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I like the intro I am still grateful on the weekends for not having to deal with the hangovers and the regret and shame!!! Even if I'm feeling lazy and not really doing anything, I can enjoy it rather then need it because I'm sick physically, mentally, and spiritually.
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Old 09-07-2017, 08:33 AM
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Originally Posted by saoutchik View Post
One of the many lies I used to tell myself was that I had a tough week and so would drink this weekend but quit on Monday.
Thanks for another thought-provoking post Sao. The old "it's Friday, it's been a tough week, time to toss back a few and blow off some steam." And if I'm honest, that probably worked fine for most people, including many friends of mine...they woke up Saturday feeling a bit off, and wisely reined themselves in for the rest of the weekend. Unfortunately--and despite mountains of evidence to the contrary--it took me years to realize that I wasn't "most people." I woke up Saturday, feeling badly, and "Hey! no need to be at work, let's have a drink!" Thus Saturday evaporated into a boozy ether which lasted the entire weekend. I would emerge from the fog Monday morning feeling like death on a stick, popping a couple of morning drinks to "get myself right" (aka-fight off withdrawal symptoms). I then enjoyed a miserable, hot, sweaty, anxious Monday, a slightly better (but still not good) Tues/Wed/Thurs, and started the insanity all over again after work Friday. Why I ever thought this was a healthy pattern of living, I'll never know. At a certain point it becomes academic -- I've been sober for almost a year-and-a-half, and I'm only looking back enough to remind myself what I need to avoid.

If anybody still going through this can take anything from my experience, it should be this: A big reason I was able to continue like that for years was a lack of accountability. I live alone, had no family in town, had withdrawn from friends for the most part, and didn't let on to anybody that I had a problem. I showed up for work Mondays, there was money in the bank, and the bills got paid, so I was left alone. That's a dangerous mix for an alcoholic. I only got better after I let people know I had a problem and they held me accountable for my own recovery.
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Old 09-07-2017, 09:33 AM
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That was a first class post DesertDawg, I really hope that people who want to quit but are still hesitating read it.

ps. The lack of accountability applied to me to, part of that was caused by my drinking which in turn reinforced it. Talk about a vicious circle.
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Old 09-07-2017, 09:43 AM
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I like this ! weekend starting on a Thursday . My weekend was Thurs to Mon then as if that wasn,t bad enough would keep going an extra couple of days till I was well and truly F$%$ up mentllay and physically .
I'm exited at the idea of sober weekends now .
I can drive ,help,read,write ,eat,walk,talk,cut grass,prune flowers,paint fences,clean floors ,varnish tables,fix computers,hang washing, wash me,trim big toe nails................................. the list is endless . But drunk I could do nothing , nothing worthwhile or meaningful .
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Old 09-07-2017, 11:12 AM
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I'm in! I lack the accountability as well. I am sure having some is a big help.
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Old 09-07-2017, 12:49 PM
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Thanks Sao. Great post as always.
I am committing to a sober weekend. I certainly don't miss feeling at deaths door on Saturday morning, unable to move until I had another drink in the afternoon. It really is a kind of hell in the end. Despite knowing this, weekends are still the hardest for me but it is definitely getting easier.
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Old 09-07-2017, 12:58 PM
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This is my first sober weekend in a long time- but I do remember when I was sober a year back I would be like who dis?? Getting stuff actually ready for the week ahead, doing hair and face masks, going to the gym and actually going grocery shopping. Those are the best of days, walking into work Monday morning, who dis!
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Old 09-07-2017, 02:04 PM
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Welcome to Weekenders icandothis! I don't go to the gym but I do jog and as you can see my grocery shopping has been done
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Old 09-07-2017, 02:11 PM
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Hey all ,
i hope everyone is prepped for that Friday feeling, it happens. It's up to us how we deal with it .
I made sure shopping was done thursday night so i had no excuse to loiter or do a slow drive by the shop on a friday afternoon .

I used to leave money and cards at home .

I made sure there was a chocolate bar or ice cream in the early days so i had a surrogate treat to spoil myself with .

It wasn't a walk in the park but it took the edge off enough , getting through is ok , when i first rode a bike i wobbled and had to put my feet down a lot .

early sobriety doesn't need to be full of grace and glory but that will come with time if you stick with it ..

keep on , m
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Old 09-07-2017, 02:49 PM
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Oh God. I'm back to work with a bang after 3 days annual leave. I do not get paid half enough for all the things I have to do.
After work I went to town to buy a book and I was standing in the queue to buy a book. Some guy merrily skipped by me which I was annoyed about then he began shouting at a pal of his who was outside the queue. The cashier came back and looked at the two of us and said "who is next?" The guy strode up merrily to the cashiers desk. At that point I arrived beside him and told her "I was actually queuing but yet he arrived before me". The guy turned to me and said "oh excuse me. You go ahead" in an extremely sarcastic tone and made a big show out of making a bow. I thanked him and went ahead.

The only reason I did this is because I have been through this with my therapist many many times. I always put up with this type of thing. And then my therapist would say "and when you let that behaviour go, how does it make you feel?" I would tell him "very angry, also sad. More angry at myself that I could not stick up for myself ever. And I would be angry for the rest of the night".

Today I skipped out of that bookstore with a new energy and a happy heart.

I hope you all have a good weekend too
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Old 09-07-2017, 03:17 PM
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Hey everyone! Hoping to stay close to you guys - hoping Irma stays far away! Also hoping we don't lose electricity ~ I guess I need to be able to fight off the AV even if I can't check in with everyone here.

I brought the cat over from Mom's since she went to my sister's to ride out the storm this weekend....kitty is hiding under the bed
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Old 09-07-2017, 04:22 PM
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Hey y'all. With football starting, be extra careful and don't get caught up in the "spirits" of things this weekend - those of you who know what football is. Best of luck to those down in the path of Irma, and to those recovering from Harvey. Don't let these tragedies influence your determination to stay on the sober path.
And what Sao sez: I never ran out of excuses to drink. Didn't really need one but always had one. Don't let the weekend or any other event become an excuse. Love yourself more better than that.
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