How many times?
sober style
Join Date: May 2016
Location: San Antonio
Posts: 2,382
I started quitting in February 2016, had 75 days on my own, then drank thru May 2016. Came here to SR and had 208 days, then drank thru January 2017. I'm at 219 days now so this is my 3rd try. I'd like to think I've cracked the case! Time will tell. One thing's for sure, I'm a whole lot healthier and happier than I was back when I was drinking. Lost 101 pounds and turned around bad liver tests etc.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,384
Originally Posted by Done4Ever 
Well Dee,
I've analyzed it over and over, and I seem to have a pattern of feeling better and then convince myself I won't over consume, it won't control me. I know time and time again it always goes downhill.
Sometimes I can beat back the voice. Obviously more times it uses its deception and I fall to it.
I continue to change and try different avenues, and it seems to be getting better where I am going longer and drinking less, but I am not looking to drink less, I am going for the drinking nothing. I keep adjusting and trying new things since I know trying the same things over and over never works.
I've analyzed it over and over, and I seem to have a pattern of feeling better and then convince myself I won't over consume, it won't control me. I know time and time again it always goes downhill.
Sometimes I can beat back the voice. Obviously more times it uses its deception and I fall to it.
I continue to change and try different avenues, and it seems to be getting better where I am going longer and drinking less, but I am not looking to drink less, I am going for the drinking nothing. I keep adjusting and trying new things since I know trying the same things over and over never works.
I think you get to a point though when you just know this next time is not going to be different...?
that's when you're faced with making a good or a bad decision.
Both choices involve effort and commitment.
If you're committed to action either way, I hope you'll decide to feed the good wolf rather than the bad.
Tons of support here - and lots of old posts to read - if you need help in making the right decision.
D
Guest
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 8,674
Honestly? One.
I was just DONE and I started - finally- my sober life. The only times I'd "quit" before were ones where I was hospitalized for some reason or another and couldn't get alcohol.
My only and last resort was AA. It - and God- have saved my life and there isn't "try" - only "do" in my life. I wouldn't trade it for anything, especially not a drink.
The one thing I hear most from you is something I don't hear- a plan of action. I have 18 mo plus (561 days) and my living, breathing, daily life is one of recovery and freedom. There are other paths besides AA - in my observation over my sober time, the common thread(s) people who stay sober have is something bigger than themselves, and an unwavering commitment to sobriety.
You can do it. Wanting to be sober - and learning how to live that way, and building tools to do that- more than wanting to drink and have what THAT choice brings - key.
Take care.
I was just DONE and I started - finally- my sober life. The only times I'd "quit" before were ones where I was hospitalized for some reason or another and couldn't get alcohol.
My only and last resort was AA. It - and God- have saved my life and there isn't "try" - only "do" in my life. I wouldn't trade it for anything, especially not a drink.
The one thing I hear most from you is something I don't hear- a plan of action. I have 18 mo plus (561 days) and my living, breathing, daily life is one of recovery and freedom. There are other paths besides AA - in my observation over my sober time, the common thread(s) people who stay sober have is something bigger than themselves, and an unwavering commitment to sobriety.
You can do it. Wanting to be sober - and learning how to live that way, and building tools to do that- more than wanting to drink and have what THAT choice brings - key.
Take care.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Baton Rouge, La.
Posts: 15,236
No matter how many obstacles in life
I faced, I never picked up a drink of poison
once since I entered recovery back in
August of 1990.
In my 28 day rehab stay plus a 6 week
outpatient aftercare program, I was
taught about my addiction and was
given a program of recovery as my
guideline to incorporate in all areas
of my life and was told I wouldn't
need to drink again as long as I followed
this one day at a time.
Sure, I have growing pains in recovery
for the past 27 yrs., divorced after 25
yrs, relocated several times, and remarried,
but never did I turn to the dark side of
addiction that tried to kill me or rob me
of the life I have today.
Recovery is a journey and each day
I have to practice maintenance, continued
maintenance each and everyday using
all the knowledge and tools of recovery
ive acquired over the past yrs in order
to achieve a healthier, happier, honest
quality of life.
Sharing my experiences, strengths
and hopes of what my life was and
is like before, during and after addiction
to others still suffering allows me to
keep enjoying those gifts of the promises
as written in the Big Book of AA.
Of course this is how it continues to
work for me each day I remain sober.
I faced, I never picked up a drink of poison
once since I entered recovery back in
August of 1990.
In my 28 day rehab stay plus a 6 week
outpatient aftercare program, I was
taught about my addiction and was
given a program of recovery as my
guideline to incorporate in all areas
of my life and was told I wouldn't
need to drink again as long as I followed
this one day at a time.
Sure, I have growing pains in recovery
for the past 27 yrs., divorced after 25
yrs, relocated several times, and remarried,
but never did I turn to the dark side of
addiction that tried to kill me or rob me
of the life I have today.
Recovery is a journey and each day
I have to practice maintenance, continued
maintenance each and everyday using
all the knowledge and tools of recovery
ive acquired over the past yrs in order
to achieve a healthier, happier, honest
quality of life.
Sharing my experiences, strengths
and hopes of what my life was and
is like before, during and after addiction
to others still suffering allows me to
keep enjoying those gifts of the promises
as written in the Big Book of AA.
Of course this is how it continues to
work for me each day I remain sober.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: northern michigan. not the U.P.
Posts: 15,281
Originally Posted by Done4Ever
...and I seem to have a pattern of feeling better and then convince myself I won't over consume, it won't control me. I know time and time again it always goes downhill.
Sometimes I can beat back the voice. Obviously more times it uses its deception and I fall to it. .
Sometimes I can beat back the voice. Obviously more times it uses its deception and I fall to it. .
Most of us have been unwilling to admit we were real alcoholics. No person likes to think he is bodily and mentally different from his fellows. Therefore, it is not surprising that our drinking careers have been characterized by countless vain attempts to prove we could drink like other people. The idea that somehow, someday he will control and enjoy his drinking is the great obsession of every abnormal drinker. The persistence of this illusion is astonishing. Many pursue it into the gates of insanity or death.
__________________________________________________ __________________________
you mentioned meetings- have you read the big book or gone into stepwork?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2017
Posts: 116
I have read the book. Can't say I've done the step work.
The brain is trying to convince me to get a drink tonight. Instead I changed into sweats so I can't go out. It's amazing how easy it is to fall.
Ugh...
The brain is trying to convince me to get a drink tonight. Instead I changed into sweats so I can't go out. It's amazing how easy it is to fall.
Ugh...
12 Step Recovered Alcoholic
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: New Zealand
Posts: 6,613
When I first read the book, among other things, I missed this bit.
"This is repeated over and over, and unless this person can experience an entire psychic change there is very little hope of his recovery.
On the other hand-and strange as this may seem to those who do not understand-once a psychic change has occurred, the very same person who seemed doomed, who had so many problems he despaired of ever solving them, suddenly finds himself easily able to control his desire for alcohol, the only effort necessary being that required to follow a few simple rules."
"This is repeated over and over, and unless this person can experience an entire psychic change there is very little hope of his recovery.
On the other hand-and strange as this may seem to those who do not understand-once a psychic change has occurred, the very same person who seemed doomed, who had so many problems he despaired of ever solving them, suddenly finds himself easily able to control his desire for alcohol, the only effort necessary being that required to follow a few simple rules."
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2017
Posts: 116
Originally Posted by Dee74
I think it boils down to wanting change - and being prepared to work to see those changes happen.
There are no passive players when it comes to enduring recovery.
D
There are no passive players when it comes to enduring recovery.
D
Member
Join Date: Mar 2015
Location: Florida
Posts: 874
I knew I needed to for years - and wanted to. I had a few sober periods of more than a few weeks.
The turning point was a few years ago: I was drunk, fell and taken to the ER where I was Baker acted for 3 days. I was furious about that then actually glad as I stayed sober almost a year and realized how nice it was.
This time, my daughter moved in with me and announced I was quitting. I wasn't "ready" in my mind but knew I needed to take advantage of this "help". I haven't had a drink in over 2.5 years.
If what you've done in the past hasn't worked, find another solution but know that there is no secret trick, vitamin or quick fix.
The turning point was a few years ago: I was drunk, fell and taken to the ER where I was Baker acted for 3 days. I was furious about that then actually glad as I stayed sober almost a year and realized how nice it was.
This time, my daughter moved in with me and announced I was quitting. I wasn't "ready" in my mind but knew I needed to take advantage of this "help". I haven't had a drink in over 2.5 years.
If what you've done in the past hasn't worked, find another solution but know that there is no secret trick, vitamin or quick fix.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,384
Originally Posted by Done4Ever
It really isn't something you can be passive about. The AV is very strong. Always trying to convince me I can have one and be fine but, I know 1 is too many. I have every desire to stay on this recovery road.
Did it that way for years myself.
My point, perhaps badly made, was that hard work effort and preparation can defeat the Beast, condition, addiction, AV, inner addict or whatever you want to call it
You can do this Done4ever
D
Member
Join Date: Aug 2010
Posts: 3,109
Why don't you go over and read in the Secular Connections forum Done4Ever? That's where I learned how to recognize and dissociate from my AV. There are lots of really great threads about AVRT.
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...iscussion.html
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...iscussion.html
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2017
Posts: 116
Great link Zenchaser!
I used some of these today to address the AV, and it was strong, even to the point, I talked to people about going out. Glad I was able to use these and avoid going to have drinks. I know I would say just one, and end up having many many more, and end up utterly useless tomorrow.
Now I will be feeling great tomorrow, get a ton done, and be glad. The weekend will be a challenge for me, already thinking of plans to avoid a beverage this weekend.
I used some of these today to address the AV, and it was strong, even to the point, I talked to people about going out. Glad I was able to use these and avoid going to have drinks. I know I would say just one, and end up having many many more, and end up utterly useless tomorrow.
Now I will be feeling great tomorrow, get a ton done, and be glad. The weekend will be a challenge for me, already thinking of plans to avoid a beverage this weekend.
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