Day 15. All plans failed today...
Gratitude Gardener
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2017
Posts: 278
Day 15. All plans failed today...
Except the plan to stay sober!
YAY!
Thats called a WIN <3
Woke up today with my old knee injury thing coming back today with sharp pain... all day. In happens about once or twice a year.
So, was unable to do yoga and could barely walk my dog. I felt bad about my incapacity several times today. Felt like a loser.
I just keep telling myself that its all okay. And then I feel okay. And then I get irritated. Then I self sooth again telling myself its all okay.
And on and on it goes...
I am raising a baby, and that baby is my sober self. She needs extra love and attention for ... for a long while to come... but she will delight me as any growing child will... each new day learn something new... grow... make me chuckle... drive me batty... and bring me to tears for the love that was born to my heart when she was born.
I see that so clearly right now.
So... The baby again required me to focus only on her to the exclusion of other chores and tasks.
Its good to know WHICH thing is the true priority here. And to finally have the correct perspective, which is the perspective of success ...
I stayed sober = Successful.
YAY!
Thats called a WIN <3
Woke up today with my old knee injury thing coming back today with sharp pain... all day. In happens about once or twice a year.
So, was unable to do yoga and could barely walk my dog. I felt bad about my incapacity several times today. Felt like a loser.
I just keep telling myself that its all okay. And then I feel okay. And then I get irritated. Then I self sooth again telling myself its all okay.
And on and on it goes...
I am raising a baby, and that baby is my sober self. She needs extra love and attention for ... for a long while to come... but she will delight me as any growing child will... each new day learn something new... grow... make me chuckle... drive me batty... and bring me to tears for the love that was born to my heart when she was born.
I see that so clearly right now.
So... The baby again required me to focus only on her to the exclusion of other chores and tasks.
Its good to know WHICH thing is the true priority here. And to finally have the correct perspective, which is the perspective of success ...
I stayed sober = Successful.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2015
Posts: 666
Herculana, just saw this now. Way to go! Love your analogy of caring for a baby; so true in these early days. All consuming, sometimes exhausting, but with surprises and joys along the way.
Keep it up! (You got me with the tricky title too!)
Keep it up! (You got me with the tricky title too!)
Guest
Join Date: Aug 2017
Posts: 6
Super post Herculana, to love yourself as you would nurture a baby and stay sober, no matter what.
A huge part, after I stopped drinking, was to develop and nourish self-care, self-acceptance and self-esteem. Lastly, self-forgiveness, as I'd beaten myself up for years with shame and guilt, engendered by drinking and consequent behaviour.
Slowly this nurturing of the 'selfs' grew a fledgling self-love. Once I began to love myself, there's no way I could pour poison down my throat and damage, myself: - or in your analogy, my sober baby.
A huge part, after I stopped drinking, was to develop and nourish self-care, self-acceptance and self-esteem. Lastly, self-forgiveness, as I'd beaten myself up for years with shame and guilt, engendered by drinking and consequent behaviour.
Slowly this nurturing of the 'selfs' grew a fledgling self-love. Once I began to love myself, there's no way I could pour poison down my throat and damage, myself: - or in your analogy, my sober baby.
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