rainyengland

Just fed up , this week gone from bad to worse

I can just feel my resolve slipping every day lately ,the thought of drinking my problems away actually makes more sense and less pain the facing up to them

Day hundred and something , just gets harder and harder this :-(

herculana

Sit down right now, clear everything off the table, and put a timer on for 10 minutes. Close your eyes and silently repeat over and over, as a mantra: "I am grateful for my sobriety".

See how you feel afterward.

Horn95

Don't give up! It will only make matters worse. If you think you feel bad now, just remember how horrible it was when you were drinking. It'll be ok for a few hours, but then reality will set in, and the vicious cycle resumes.

Look, you have demonstrated amazing strength. I admire you. I want to be like you. Don't throw in the towel.

tomsteve

and you know that thought is a complete lie. sooner or later youll have to face it all.

why not type about whats goin on so folks here can give suggestions for solutions?

doggonecarl

I00 days is pretty impressive.

How will drinking make your problems go away?

You know it doesn't work that way. You can drink to forget, temporarily, your problems, you can drink so you don't care about your problems, again temporarily. But in the end you will have your problems AND be at day one again.

Sobriety is about coping. It's not easy. But it's a more permanent problem solver than drinking.

Horn95

Great advice in this thread. I second the notion that you write about what has you teetering on the edge. Lot's of smart, experienced people around this place.

loulou1981

Don't do it, relax, distract urself or perhaps get an early night. Drinking as u know makes thing's 100% worse the next day

rainyengland

It's something in my personal life,making me feel sad,angry,lonely,jealous,revengeful

I know I'm in the wrong as well which is making it worse and I also know I'm not being at all rational or adult about it - not a very nice person me!!

Just feel really down

Strangely I can open up and admit I've been a complete drunk alcoholic for 15 years but this problem I won't open up for fear of being judged - brilliant!!

It was alcohol that gave me this problem I'm going through now!

Sorry for negative posting - just want to scream and sob

joandmelandhan

Rainyengland I drank 11 days ago on my day 99. I'd just had absolutely enough of fighting myself plus I had a whole lot of stuff going on I felt simply not equipped to deal with.
It tasted awful. The feeling was nasty. Worst of all the self esteem I'd built up was gone.
I urge you to keep going PLEASE. There isn't one aspect of your life that a drink will help. Nothing.
You'll never regret waking up tomorrow morning sober but I guarantee you'll regret drinking.
It's bed time now rainyengland I hope you can get your head on the pillow sober tonight I really do xxx

joandmelandhan

So scream and sob loudly then!!!!!!

Post as negatively as you like!!!!!!!

Just don't drink!!!!!!!!!!

Carlygirl

I have recently been finding the SMART ABC tool helpful when I have been thinking the way you are now. What belief do you have that makes you think that drinking is easier or the right thing for you? It is almost certainly an irrational belief. Get a pen and paper like the others say. Explore the beliefs that are underlying your current thinking. Don't throw away 100 plus days. Carly

AnvilheadII

our inner addict LUVS a bad week, LUVS conflict. salivates over problems in personal relationships. it knows that a drink won't SOLVE anything but it sure will feed the beast and get the plan for utter self-extinction back underway.

life on life's terms. that's how we do it now. we hitch up our big kid panties or knickers, and we say "bring it on"! we don't shirk from obligation or responsibility, we take our lumps, we pull our own covers, and we trudge that damn road to happy destiny.

soberlicious

This is your AV talking. Think of it this way...that part of you that loves booze just wants booze. Doesn't give a rat'sfatass that drinking won't fix anything, and it will actually multiply your problems. It is using your current troubles as an excuse for what it wants. Of course you know full well that the brief respite you will get from the oblivion alcohol brings will not actually solve any problem. Think about the phrase you use "drinking your problems away" The problems don't go away with drinking. Problems are solved by facing them and finding solutions to them, as uncomfortable and sh*tty is that can be much of the time. That necessary process is something that drinking will never allow you to do. But you know this already.

Your problems are a ready excuse for the AV. It is a master at conning you. Don't fall for that garbage.

2ndhandrose

Please don't drink. You will NEVER regret NOT drinking.

If you think you feel bad now, alcohol will increase all of it 1000 fold.

This is tough, you are tougher.

kenton

Don't drink Rainyengland.

Digging deep now will really pay off. My experience is that sobriety seems to gain momentum the longer you stick with it. You get to the point where life still happens and problems still arise but drinking stops appealing as a solution. And because I'm sober, I deal with problems better and they don't escalate.

Drinking now might seem like a temporary quick fix for whatever is going on right now. But staying sober gives you the best chance for dealing effectively with what life is throwing at you now and what it may throw at you in the future. Think long term and stay sober.

january161992

DON'T DO IT !!!

Dee74

Some great advice here rainyengland - how are you holding up?

Often when I know I'm in the wrong, even tho it hurts my pride, it's good to clear the air.

Clean slates are a source of great relief

D

rainyengland

Dee that's it - my pride is hurting !!

Funny how you when someone says it then clicks ..how I deal with it there's a question :-/

Swallow my pride and not a drink ..good starting point I guess !

loulou1981

Can u tell us what the issue is or do u just not want to talk about it? It might help?

Hevyn

Rainy, all the good stuff's already been said - so I'll just join with the others in saying please don't drink & cause yourself even more misery. This bad time will pass. I'm glad you wanted to talk things over here - we care about you.