Allyson1986xxx

It's 11.50am in the UK I've just had an argument with my partner of almost 4 years about his attitude towards me and how he always puts me 2nd to his family, and that sounds bad but I mean things like letting his family talk about me behind my back, laugh at me, treat me basically like and I am not allowed to say anything or I'm the bad one.
It all started because I nearly spilled the ashtray he raised his voice and said "you don't care about nothing" and I was like what.......it's only an ashtray.
I gave him an ultimatum last week after his sister text me pretending to be another male, which he was in on as it was a laugh he said, and this was whilst I was seeing my kids, that if he didn't start treating me better and not allowing his family to treat me like that either then we were over.
And right now this is the only way I see it going, I think he's just with me cause he doesn't want to be lonely and I am starting to feel like it's pointless as I get nothing out it but hassle and headaches. AND I WILL NOT RUIN THIS PERIOD OF SOBERITY FOR NO CHANCE.......

I feel so much better just ranting.........and I know it's just my AV trying to tell me drink will help me..........but I won't let it!!!!
Thank god I've found this forum or I'd probably be off and running by now!!!

Mummyto2

Hi stay strong and kick that AV in the backside, DONT let it beat you, the feeling will pass, lots of triggers with this sneaky git of a disease, tell the devil he can keep his p*ss, sorry I call it that, good luck

Allyson1986xxx

Thank you, yeah I agree it is definitely devil's I'll get there it's my 1st real day I've struggled and I know they're will be hard days........just need to remember I'm doing this for ME not for him or them......

Mummyto2

Good on you, I am day 11 we can do this, keep posting it really helps

Time2Rise

Stay sober Allyson, you will calm down in due time, and then you can make good, sober decisions regarding the issues with your partner.

And If you need to vent a little more, you have a great place to do it here on SR.

Allyson1986xxx

Yeah it's crazy how much it helped me there just by getting it out, because usually I would've been at the shop for a bottle and came back to deliberately argue with him, I somehow think that's what he was expecting but nope I will do this, I'll make sure I don't lose this period because it's only me I'll let down.
And I think if this keeps up I'll be left with no choice but to leave him, because sanity is worth it and the more sober I get, i feel better about myself more and more, and I won't be settling for this s..t I've been getting the whole time drunk, I thought I deserved it but noone deserves this.
All I have ever done is try my best for him and his family and they've taken my kindness for weakness, and I put up with it. But now this wee bit of soberity I'm thinking I need to show people I won't be walked over and used constantly.

I have tried to explain to him, so if he doesn't sort himself out, then I'll have no choice but to walk because I know putting up with this s..t I will get drunk again....

Allyson1986xxx

Thank you ........

Bikiny33

Idea isn't bad though. Just continue drinking and enjoy.

Allyson1986xxx

hahahahahaha i would be if it were that easy............if it didn't almost kill my everytime..................and i certainy wouldn't be sitting here trying to keep it together, posting on a forum!!!!

PhoenixJ

The fact is you did not drink. Yoo probably did not want to, but anger and frustration made it seem that way. GOOD FOR YOU POSTING!
That is half the reason I do. It is also the reason I go to meetings- like a free psychologist.

Allyson1986xxx

Yeah definitely I don't, I just wanted to escape the crap that was going on around me, I will be going to a meeting tonight and as soon as I got it out I just felt so better.

Dee74

I hope you're feeling a little better now Allyson.

D

Delilah1

Hi Allyson,

I'm glad you came here and posted, this site is wonderful, and you used it exactly how you should when the urge to drink hit.