jessiessong

Hey everyone, my name is Jessie and I'm new here. I thought I could sign up and take advantage of the wonderful support group I've seen on SR.

Quick backstory, I have been drinking pretty much daily for three years. It started as a way to control anxiety, but its just become a habit now. Early on my wife found out that I was sneaking drinks, and that was enough to scare me away for a few months... and then it started again, and I've been drinking approximately 13 UK units, which is about 6-7 US units of vodka per day, sometimes more sometimes less.

I am very high functioning, hold down 2 demanding jobs, and never drink during the day. However, when I come home, I start drinking pretty much right away. I really dislike the habit, as I feel guilty for hiding it from my wife and for what I'm doing to my future. Realizing this problem, I've signed up for alcohol addiction counseling and have been going weekly over the last months. With help, I reduced my alcohol intake to 4 units, but then bounced right back.

At this point in my life, I would like to give it up cold turkey, which is the only way I think I can manage to give it up. I take plenty of thaimine and vitamins and have never had any withdrawal symptoms. Normally, I go periods of 20 hours without having alcohol, then drink between four hours per day. Has anyone here had experience with quitting cold turney without withdrawal? Everything I read online says that the symptoms should start around 8 hours and peak within 48, but 'm wondering if I don't have any symptoms in 20 hours, does that mean I am not likely to have any?

If cold turkey isn't good, I would also try tapering again. My problem is, I am afraid of not having extra alcohol on hand in case I start getting withrawal sympotoms, so I usually buy more than I need to taper that day.. then, the weak will sets in and I drink it anyways. If I try to taper, I think I will have to buy the exact amount from my market just before the store closes so that I won't be able to run back and buy more.

In any case, sorry for rambling. I'm sure everyone here has heard so many of these stories before. Thank you for taking the time, and I look forward to working towards my goal of abstinence along side you wonderful people.

jessiessong

I should also note that my title pertains to the fact that I live in a small town to which I recently moved and know very few people. My wife is also unaware of my problem at the moment, so there's not really a support net here.

ScottFromWI

Welcome jessiesong. You'll find a lot of support here and understanding too. Glad to to hear that you've decided to quit, it's a great decision that will allow you to make some big improvements in your life.

Regarding withdrawals, we really can't predict how bad they might be, even one individual might have few or no symptoms one time and then others the next. If you have concerns, speaking with a doctor is the safest bet. You hit on several of the pitfalls of "tapering" in your message too. While it's theoretically possible, it is extremely difficult in practice. For one thing it is a form of controlling your drinking, and most of us can't do that....it's the very reason we need to stop. Additionally, even with a taper you still need to quit completely at some point, and witdrawals are still possible then too.

PhoenixJ

W/D- Agree with Scott- see a doc. I had seizures. Great about the addiction counsellor, but if you are anything at all like me- any booze- ever, is bad. Complete abstinence with a sober battery recharge is needed- with counselling, here and meetings. Support to you.

jessiessong

Thank you both for the responses. I did see a doctor when I started, and he referred me to the counselor. The counselor is the one who suggested tapering being the best method. I will speak to a doctor again though.

If I may ask, how long/much did you drink before you tried quitting and had seizures? Did you have any other widrawal symptoms?

PhoenixJ

Jessie- I drank heavily, daily for many years- but the seizures were b4 I got really bad. It happened on day 2, I think. The physical stuff takes about 5 days. Tapering off - well, I was suggested that too- by my boss at that time (controlled drinking- he was an expert being a sociologist'? The physical act of drinking once the physical stuff is gone makes it seem easy. But it is the mind- and a lifetime's worth of crap- takes support, work and time. So AA meetings for me, and counselling (basically tell them you want not to drink)- plus CBT with a psychologist and journaling and a whole change of thinking and living.
Support to you.

Mummyto2

Welcome, lots of lovely people on here with great help and advice

jessiessong

Thank you for sharing that. I have also tried CBT for other things and I've found it very effective. I will discuss with a doctor and look into more counseling.

Dee74

welcome jessiessong

Another failed taperer here. If I could control my intake I wouldn't need to taper.

But..yeah do speak to a doctor - if they suggest tapering as well, the least they can do is give you are some guidelines.

D

tealily

Welcome, Jessie.

So glad you are here and that you are planning to make this change for the better in your life. SR is a great resource with lots of wonderful people willing to help. We can be your "town"!

I was also a secret drinker, hiding it from my husband and kids. I now have over 2 months without alcohol, and life is so much better. SR has been my only outside support.

Introducing myself here was what helped me turn the corner. I hope it's that way for you too!

tealily

my story:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...rate-stop.html

jessiessong

Thanks you for sharing, Tea, and for everyone's encouraging words! Did you happen to use the taper off method too, or do a full on detox?

Bottletop

Welcome Jessie. I was an evening drinker midweek, varied between 7 to 15 (sometimes more) an evening...but weekends started getting worse. Like you, high function with stressful job. Tapering was not the answer for me. Had to go cold turkey. I guess withdrawals differ person by person. I was already hot, sweaty and anxious, so I only got better. Each time i stopped I was the same, but I think I had a high threshold for alchohol. I took vitamins and supplements and lots of water which i guess helped. Get advice re the physical side effects, but stopping is the end game, so the sooner the better. I'm 2 weeks in and feeling the benefits.

TheProdigy

Yes, I braced myself waiting for withdrawal symptoms and nothing happened. I drank 6 pints of 8.6% beer every night for about 5 years (with a couple months of sobriety each year ).

tealily

Jessie, I didn't taper, but I had had several months here and there of no drinking in the past. So I just stopped and haven't picked up again.
I had a rough time sleeping for a while but no other physical side effects. But that was just me! I know some people need to be medically supervised.

Do you have a doctor to talk to, to be safe?

So happy you are ready for this change! We are here for you.

Anna

Jessie, tapering is all but impossible for alcoholics. Tapering is about controlling our drinking, and if we could that, we would not be alcoholics.

Do talk to your dr and perhaps explain to him that you want to stop drinking completely. Hopefully he will be supportive.

Berrybean

If you're in the UK the nearest AA group / meeting is unlikely to be very far away. Have you looked for where these are in your area? I was really surprised just how many meetings were happening in my area that I never realised were happening.

Find a Meeting | AA Meetings | Alcoholics Anonymous (Great Britain) Ltd

Anyway. Glad you found this forum.

Wishing you all the best for your sobriety and recovery. BB

MLD51

I quit cold turkey with no serious withdrawal, and I was probably drinking about the same amount as you, but, I think I was lucky. Everyone is different. If I had known then what I know now about the potential dangers of going cold turkey, I would have sought medical advice. Fact is, no one can really say without a shadow of a doubt what YOUR body will do. Better to be safe than sorry.

loulou1981

Welcome Jessie, i would deffinately go back to ur GP, going cold turkey can b dangerous but i dont think id b able to taper if i was a daily drinker, its so tricky isnt it!

I appreciate u've hidden the extent of ur addiction from ur wife but i would b honest, ur gonna need her support.

Have u found the therapy useful?

PurpleKnight

Welcome to the Forum Jessie!!

jessiessong

Thank you all for your advice!

I have gone cold turkey before with no side effects, but I'm still concerned about this time. That being said I was wondering - if you try going cold turkey but keep a bottle of something nearby, if you start having withdrawal symptoms, could you simply drink the alcohol and make them go away again? Has anyone experienced this? I am able to go 24 hours with no drink and no effects, but haven't pushed much past that recently.