Bird beating its wings against the glass
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Join Date: Jul 2015
Posts: 666
Bird beating its wings against the glass
For some reason this image strikes me when I think about all of us who have been taken over by alcohol, but wanting, with some sort of magical thinking, to go back to drinking casually and "normally". It's not going to happen.
I picture the moderators as having seen it thousands upon thousands of times. People wanting to be the exception. But it's like watching a bird hitting against a window, thinking there's clear sky, when there's a firm barrier of glass. The way through is never going to open, but that bird is going to keep on trying, damaging its wings, tiring itself out, getting more and more panicked and desperate. Trying everything every other bird has tried before. But it's not going to happen.
For over 10 years I was a moderator on another online forum, for a medical condition. It's not the same thing as this, really, but the pattern I think must be similar, especially for the moderators.
Over the years, countless new people came. But no matter how different the personalities, circumstances and backgrounds, the problems, issues and worries related to the illness and its treatment were universal. Nothing was a surprise after a while. Over time, you could see it coming. Every worry, fear, complication. Every attempt to bargain and find a way out. The answer was always the same. You wished you could save people from the arc of what they had to go through to get to the other side. But you can't do it for them.
I don't mean to sound dismissive.. It's hard for a reason, and I'm in the midst of it too.
But it illustrates, I think, how all of us suffering would save ourselves so much grief, pain, damage and TIME, if we would just accept the gently but persistently offered advice, instead of keeping on beating against that glass.
We can't drink normally anymore.
We can't "hope" to quit, or "try" to quit.
We have to just do it.
I picture the moderators as having seen it thousands upon thousands of times. People wanting to be the exception. But it's like watching a bird hitting against a window, thinking there's clear sky, when there's a firm barrier of glass. The way through is never going to open, but that bird is going to keep on trying, damaging its wings, tiring itself out, getting more and more panicked and desperate. Trying everything every other bird has tried before. But it's not going to happen.
For over 10 years I was a moderator on another online forum, for a medical condition. It's not the same thing as this, really, but the pattern I think must be similar, especially for the moderators.
Over the years, countless new people came. But no matter how different the personalities, circumstances and backgrounds, the problems, issues and worries related to the illness and its treatment were universal. Nothing was a surprise after a while. Over time, you could see it coming. Every worry, fear, complication. Every attempt to bargain and find a way out. The answer was always the same. You wished you could save people from the arc of what they had to go through to get to the other side. But you can't do it for them.
I don't mean to sound dismissive.. It's hard for a reason, and I'm in the midst of it too.
But it illustrates, I think, how all of us suffering would save ourselves so much grief, pain, damage and TIME, if we would just accept the gently but persistently offered advice, instead of keeping on beating against that glass.
We can't drink normally anymore.
We can't "hope" to quit, or "try" to quit.
We have to just do it.
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Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: Powers Lake, Wisconsin
Posts: 21,718
That was so powerful! It really spoke to me down to my soul. Thank you for that wonderful post. It has had a major impact on me. I am very visual and the image will stay with me for a very long time. It was eye-opening!!
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Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: Powers Lake, Wisconsin
Posts: 21,718
Originally Posted by tealily 
For some reason this image strikes me when I think about all of us who have been taken over by alcohol, but wanting, with some sort of magical thinking, to go back to drinking casually and "normally". It's not going to happen.
I picture the moderators as having seen it thousands upon thousands of times. People wanting to be the exception. But it's like watching a bird hitting against a window, thinking there's clear sky, when there's a firm barrier of glass. The way through is never going to open, but that bird is going to keep on trying, damaging its wings, tiring itself out, getting more and more panicked and desperate. Trying everything every other bird has tried before. But it's not going to happen.
For over 10 years I was a moderator on another online forum, for a medical condition. It's not the same thing as this, really, but the pattern I think must be similar, especially for the moderators.
Over the years, countless new people came. But no matter how different the personalities, circumstances and backgrounds, the problems, issues and worries related to the illness and its treatment were universal. Nothing was a surprise after a while. Over time, you could see it coming. Every worry, fear, complication. Every attempt to bargain and find a way out. The answer was always the same. You wished you could save people from the arc of what they had to go through to get to the other side. But you can't do it for them.
I don't mean to sound dismissive.. It's hard for a reason, and I'm in the midst of it too.
But it illustrates, I think, how all of us suffering would save ourselves so much grief, pain, damage and TIME, if we would just accept the gently but persistently offered advice, instead of keeping on beating against that glass.
We can't drink normally anymore.
We can't "hope" to quit, or "try" to quit.
We have to just do it.
I picture the moderators as having seen it thousands upon thousands of times. People wanting to be the exception. But it's like watching a bird hitting against a window, thinking there's clear sky, when there's a firm barrier of glass. The way through is never going to open, but that bird is going to keep on trying, damaging its wings, tiring itself out, getting more and more panicked and desperate. Trying everything every other bird has tried before. But it's not going to happen.
For over 10 years I was a moderator on another online forum, for a medical condition. It's not the same thing as this, really, but the pattern I think must be similar, especially for the moderators.
Over the years, countless new people came. But no matter how different the personalities, circumstances and backgrounds, the problems, issues and worries related to the illness and its treatment were universal. Nothing was a surprise after a while. Over time, you could see it coming. Every worry, fear, complication. Every attempt to bargain and find a way out. The answer was always the same. You wished you could save people from the arc of what they had to go through to get to the other side. But you can't do it for them.
I don't mean to sound dismissive.. It's hard for a reason, and I'm in the midst of it too.
But it illustrates, I think, how all of us suffering would save ourselves so much grief, pain, damage and TIME, if we would just accept the gently but persistently offered advice, instead of keeping on beating against that glass.
We can't drink normally anymore.
We can't "hope" to quit, or "try" to quit.
We have to just do it.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2015
Posts: 666
Originally Posted by ChloeRose63
I have been reading your other post, too! The "wine-drinking" one since that was my choice. Very insightful. What does it mean when you say 'bump' your post?
Bump means to add a comment at the bottom of an older thread, so that it will pop back up on the first page of active threads on the forum. That was my introductory thread, when I first posted out loud here, back in May. I've been adding updates to it as I go along, as well as posting new standalone threads. If you go to the first page, that's my intro:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...rate-stop.html
So glad if any of this helps anyone! As I say, I hope it's not annoying to keep updating it.
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