Ok. I'm having a not-so-great time.
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Join Date: Aug 2016
Location: Boston Ma
Posts: 980
Happy Birthday Bix! I hope you are having a good day. I am struggling with anxiety tonight was happy to read your earlier posts about achieving Day 1 and 2. That made me feel that I could achieve my daily goal.
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Join Date: Oct 2015
Posts: 2,393
Originally Posted by Mklove 
Happy Birthday Bix! I hope you are having a good day. I am struggling with anxiety tonight was happy to read your earlier posts about achieving Day 1 and 2. That made me feel that I could achieve my daily goal.
I want to tell you again how much your posts in this thread touched me. I've had a serious loss in recent months. Your seeking and courage and honest grief (and resilience) show subtly in your posts. I am grateful...so grateful...to share company on this path.
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Join Date: Jul 2017
Location: Scotland
Posts: 626
Happy Birthday! I turned 58 just a few days before you, drank too much and was sick and miserable. That's what spurred me to join this site. 58 seems to me to be as good a place as any to start afresh. 
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,436
Hey Bix - I'm sorry I missed this. Happy Birthday
I'm not going to drown you in platitudes - the bottom line, for me, is attitude.
I'm worse off than some but way ahead of others. I'm not sure I believe everything is for a reason but I do believe everything can be a teachable moment.
Whatever the added stuff I carry, I'm alive and I'm happy to be alive - recovery gave me that.
When the time comes, as it does to us all, I'm going to go out on my feet, not my knees.
D
I'm not going to drown you in platitudes - the bottom line, for me, is attitude.
I'm worse off than some but way ahead of others. I'm not sure I believe everything is for a reason but I do believe everything can be a teachable moment.
Whatever the added stuff I carry, I'm alive and I'm happy to be alive - recovery gave me that.
When the time comes, as it does to us all, I'm going to go out on my feet, not my knees.
D
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Join Date: Oct 2015
Posts: 2,393
Dee, you didn't miss anything. I thought of you from the first miserable word I wrote in this sad-sack thread...all through the weekend, I thought about you. You generously share your own experience and circumstances. I'm sure you know how much it means, particularly, to some here.
My view exactly: no "reason", just luck, just genes...AND then what will we do with our luck and genes? Teachable moments, I've had a few. I plan to make this moment last and bear the fruit of change.
My view exactly: no "reason", just luck, just genes...AND then what will we do with our luck and genes? Teachable moments, I've had a few. I plan to make this moment last and bear the fruit of change.
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Join Date: Oct 2015
Posts: 2,393
July 31. Day 5.
The name of this thread is quickly becoming passé. Should be renamed to something like "Bixbee's Relapse Reboot". The things I led off with at the start of this thread really do sum up my current and deepest challenges. And I am going to tackle each one this time around. Otherwise, what truly eats my lunch will one day buy a bottle. I'm not having it. So there's change a-comin'.
This is my thread going forward. I'm keeping it. If it interests anyone, fine. If not, fine. If I NEED something from the SR family, I will make it obvious...I'm not counting on people keeping up with a boring... Day X, Day Y thread.
This thread will be a lot like watching paint dry. But it WILL be fresh paint! See...even my analogies are completely predictable!
The name of this thread is quickly becoming passé. Should be renamed to something like "Bixbee's Relapse Reboot". The things I led off with at the start of this thread really do sum up my current and deepest challenges. And I am going to tackle each one this time around. Otherwise, what truly eats my lunch will one day buy a bottle. I'm not having it. So there's change a-comin'.
This is my thread going forward. I'm keeping it. If it interests anyone, fine. If not, fine. If I NEED something from the SR family, I will make it obvious...I'm not counting on people keeping up with a boring... Day X, Day Y thread.
This thread will be a lot like watching paint dry. But it WILL be fresh paint! See...even my analogies are completely predictable!
Giving up is NOT an option.
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Western Wisconsin
Posts: 7,808
I missed your birthday! Happy Belated birthday, Bix. I know you have faced and are facing many challenges. I cannot put myself in your place - I haven't had your experiences. But - I do believe with all my heart that you can and will overcome. You keep coming back here - you are honest about your struggles. That shows a real determination - and I admire that. Oh - and the age thing - I got sober at 51, and for a while I thought being that "old" meant that everything was a downward slide from there. NOT TRUE. I feel years younger, mentally and physically. I now feel like the best years are just beginning. I know you have a physical "thing" to deal with - and that will be tough. But your attitude and how you feel mentally can make a huge difference down the road. There's a lot of life left to live. Make the best of it!
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August 1. Day 6.
At peace in my body and mind.
Last night in bed, I read slowly and attentively through this thread again, beginning to end. Each response was so helpful, so real. And I myself have never been more real here, more myself. I'm sure I've been even more dramatic and more panicky/anxious/angry in other threads at other times. But this thread is Basic Bix.
So glad to be here on my last, more precious than ever, Day 6.
At peace in my body and mind.
Last night in bed, I read slowly and attentively through this thread again, beginning to end. Each response was so helpful, so real. And I myself have never been more real here, more myself. I'm sure I've been even more dramatic and more panicky/anxious/angry in other threads at other times. But this thread is Basic Bix.
So glad to be here on my last, more precious than ever, Day 6.
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Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: UK
Posts: 2,937
You know what Bix - drinking will only make you more frail in the years to come.
You need to future proof your health now by not drinking, eating healthy and getting some exercise.
I wish you the best xx
You need to future proof your health now by not drinking, eating healthy and getting some exercise.
I wish you the best xx
under new management
Join Date: Jun 2015
Location: Calgary, Alberta
Posts: 2,339
Basic Bix, I love it 
I am trying to live as authentically as I can, missteps and all Finding out who I am, at 58 yrs, is pretty exciting after living a tiny, fearful life all these years.
I am trying to live as authentically as I can, missteps and all
Finding out who I am, at 58 yrs, is pretty exciting after living a tiny, fearful life all these years.
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