Sober and depressed
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2017
Posts: 296
Sober and depressed
Day 10 today. I've taken drinking off the table for good. It's not an option. I have a lot of emotional stress and grief that I havnt dealt with the last few years. I've used wine to numb myself into not feeling. I've been in survival mode. Now alcohol is out of the picture all these pushed down emotions are bubbling to the surface and I just feel overwhelmed with sadness. I've been bursting into tears all day. I'm looking at my life with clear eyes and I don't like what I see. I've got so much work to do...
Sober since October
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: In the world in my eyes...Somewhere I've never been before...
Posts: 7,355
SoberNunn, congrats on day 10!
I numbed my emotions and pain with wine as well. When I quit my emotions were all over the place - severe depression, crying, mood swings.
It's part of the process, be gentle with yourself. Take care of your body and mind, let them heal. Don't overwhelm yourself with improving too many things at a time - yes, there is a lot to improve, but you have your entire sober life now to catch up.
And, though it's not uncommon to compensate alcohol cravings with sugar, be careful with it - sugar contributes A LOT to depression and unstable mood.
Best wishes to you!
I numbed my emotions and pain with wine as well. When I quit my emotions were all over the place - severe depression, crying, mood swings.
It's part of the process, be gentle with yourself. Take care of your body and mind, let them heal. Don't overwhelm yourself with improving too many things at a time - yes, there is a lot to improve, but you have your entire sober life now to catch up.
And, though it's not uncommon to compensate alcohol cravings with sugar, be careful with it - sugar contributes A LOT to depression and unstable mood.
Best wishes to you!
Hears The Voice
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Unshackled
Posts: 7,901
10 days is awesome.
Some people on here claim they felt great at 10 days, but most of us experienced an emotional roller coaster for a couple of months after giving up the bottle. I sure did, and it was no fun at all. It gets better, though. Trust that it will.
Get to work on your list. The journey of a thousand miles starts with a single step.
Some people on here claim they felt great at 10 days, but most of us experienced an emotional roller coaster for a couple of months after giving up the bottle. I sure did, and it was no fun at all. It gets better, though. Trust that it will.
Get to work on your list. The journey of a thousand miles starts with a single step.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,416
Its pretty common to be on a bit of a emotional rollercoaster for a little while SN.
I was crying even when there were things from so long ago there was really nothing to cry for.
It helped me to think of this as my mind and body adjusting to sobriety rather than me having a lot of things to be sad about?
Hang in there - it gets better
D
I was crying even when there were things from so long ago there was really nothing to cry for.
It helped me to think of this as my mind and body adjusting to sobriety rather than me having a lot of things to be sad about?
Hang in there - it gets better
D
Member
Join Date: May 2013
Location: UK
Posts: 2,057
Originally Posted by Dee74 
Its pretty common to be on a bit of a emotional rollercoaster for a little while SN.
I was crying even when there were things from so long ago there was really nothing to cry for.
It helped me to think of this as my mind and body adjusting to sobriety rather than me having a lot of things to be sad about?
Hang in there - it gets better
D
I was crying even when there were things from so long ago there was really nothing to cry for.
It helped me to think of this as my mind and body adjusting to sobriety rather than me having a lot of things to be sad about?
Hang in there - it gets better
D
The lid has come off so to speak.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Midwest
Posts: 8,334
SoberNunn,
Try not to overwhelm yourself and just keep things very simple. Make sure you're eating well, drinking plenty of water and getting rest. Plan some diversions, walks, something on Netflix.....even some small household tasks.
It will get better...or none of us would still be here !
Try not to overwhelm yourself and just keep things very simple. Make sure you're eating well, drinking plenty of water and getting rest. Plan some diversions, walks, something on Netflix.....even some small household tasks.
It will get better...or none of us would still be here !
Mini Novel Post Writer
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Maine
Posts: 3,649
I've got so much work to do...
Even the smallest, simplest things can feel really overwhelming when you're in early sobriety. Our addiction likes us to think about all these things at the same time because it's a way of roping us back in.
You're doing something so positive right now. Because of this you will eventually get all those things straightened out but for right now focus just on today.
Member
Join Date: May 2014
Location: Morrisville, NC
Posts: 45
Honestly I felt like at that point being sober I was mourning a loss. My life felt strange as if it wasn't my own. I was in a state of crying spells, euphoria, depression etc. My doctor said that my nervous system was healing and that all of that was normal. It is not uncommon and you will feel better. Probably sooner than later. Everyone told me 90 days but it was way sooner for me. I still have recent temptations and like you, drinking is not an option. Your body will level out and you will start feeling less self loathing and more well adjusted. I feel guilty for things I've done in the past and have issues with that but overall I'm at a state of physical wellbeing without the crushing depression and anxiety the first couple weeks of sobriety brought. Hang in there. Again, I'm only a couple months in but I remember feeling like you do at that point.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Glen Allen, Va
Posts: 2,589
Great advice in this thread! Same for me as well. My first few weeks of sobriety I was an emotional raw nerve. I could barely talk to people without crying. I think for a while, it's just best you don't overthink things until your mind gets used to being sober once again. Eat well and distract yourself however you can. Hope that is of some help!
Blue Belt
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Soberville, USA
Posts: 4,174
Sober,
Imo...it is a lack of dopamine that causes the mood swings.
Exercise, posting, AA meetings, adrenaline all help.
The sober muscles flex on days like today, but I play like there is no more day 1's left in me.
This thing is a killer. I am scared of booze. I put on a brave face. I have come to far to ever go back.
Stay clean.
Imo...it is a lack of dopamine that causes the mood swings.
Exercise, posting, AA meetings, adrenaline all help.
The sober muscles flex on days like today, but I play like there is no more day 1's left in me.
This thing is a killer. I am scared of booze. I put on a brave face. I have come to far to ever go back.
Stay clean.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2017
Posts: 1,476
SN,
10 days in was the 2nd phase of recovery for me in which reality began to set in. The withdrawal period was pretty much over...now what? Look at your plan, if you need to readjust do so! Remember, there's no change without change. The negative feelings are normal...AV is knocking at your door...ignore!!! These thoughts will pass!
You've been through this many times...move past it this time. You're doing really well...JUST keep going! You will be thankful that you did.
Sending you strength!
10 days in was the 2nd phase of recovery for me in which reality began to set in. The withdrawal period was pretty much over...now what? Look at your plan, if you need to readjust do so! Remember, there's no change without change. The negative feelings are normal...AV is knocking at your door...ignore!!! These thoughts will pass!
You've been through this many times...move past it this time. You're doing really well...JUST keep going! You will be thankful that you did.
Sending you strength!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2017
Posts: 296
Thank you everyone, your experiences and insight mean a lot to me. I think it is likely my brain chemistry readjusting but I also think I've got some emotional baggage I havnt dealt with that I will need to. I feel like I've woken up and I'm looking around thinking "how the hell did I end up here?".
Sober Alcoholic
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 3,539
Hi SoberNunn, You mention both grief and depression. I'm going to assume from what you wrote that you have experienced a significant loss which has contributed to your drinking.
The sort of depression that stems from loss can be its own unique form of depression. It can be addressed by people in the mental health community who specialize in helping those dealing with grief issues. If my assumption is correct, that the depression stems from a major loss, then seeking out help for coping with the grief could help quite a bit.
In any case, the advice here from others regarding the emotional swings that stem from the cessation of alcohol use will also be applicable. I hope you are able to find all the help you need wherever that may be.
Take care
The sort of depression that stems from loss can be its own unique form of depression. It can be addressed by people in the mental health community who specialize in helping those dealing with grief issues. If my assumption is correct, that the depression stems from a major loss, then seeking out help for coping with the grief could help quite a bit.
In any case, the advice here from others regarding the emotional swings that stem from the cessation of alcohol use will also be applicable. I hope you are able to find all the help you need wherever that may be.
Take care
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