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I'm 52 and still don't get it

Old 07-01-2017, 09:36 AM
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I'm 52 and still don't get it

I'd take the back door out but I can't do that to my kids. I'm so tired
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Old 07-01-2017, 09:45 AM
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Hi, Tripstotheedge.

Welcome back.

I can understand the state of tiredness and hopelessness. Been there more than once.

Everyone has his/her own "sobriety age", no use to compare yourself with others.

Have you tried some plans/programs/anything?

Tell us more and we'll try to help.

Best wishes to you.
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Old 07-01-2017, 09:46 AM
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Sorry for your pain and sadness, trips.
Here when you need us.
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Old 07-01-2017, 09:48 AM
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Welcome to the family. I hope our support can help you get sober for good.

I was 58 when I got sober and that was over 7 yrs ago, so yes, it can be done.
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Old 07-01-2017, 09:54 AM
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Hello, Trips-I understand the pain and sorrow that alcohol causes. It is certainly not too late to have a sober and happy life. I will be 57 on the 11th and currently have been sober for 18 months. SR is a great place for advice and support and I am glad that you are here.
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Old 07-01-2017, 10:02 AM
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Originally Posted by MidnightBlue View Post
Hi, Tripstotheedge.

Welcome back.

I can understand the state of tiredness and hopelessness. Been there more than once.

Everyone has his/her own "sobriety age", no use to compare yourself with others.

Have you tried some plans/programs/anything?

Tell us more and we'll try to help.

Best wishes to you.

Can't do the programs. 24 hours from now, I'll be the selfish person I always am. Vicious cycle. I'm so weak and scared. I only push forward for my kids.
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Old 07-01-2017, 10:06 AM
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Originally Posted by Verdantia View Post
Hello, Trips-I understand the pain and sorrow that alcohol causes. It is certainly not too late to have a sober and happy life. I will be 57 on the 11th and currently have been sober for 18 months. SR is a great place for advice and support and I am glad that you are here.
Ty
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Old 07-01-2017, 10:31 AM
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Originally Posted by tripstotheedge View Post
Can't do the programs. 24 hours from now, I'll be the selfish person I always am. Vicious cycle. I'm so weak and scared. I only push forward for my kids.
im glad ya made it back,trips.
yes, you can do ANY of the programs.
change doesnt happen overnight- thats just the facts.
yup, you will be the same selfish person 24 hours from now.
however
if you decide you want to be sober more than ya want to drink
and become willing to go to ANY lengths for victory over alcohol,
then get into action with any of the programs available
you CAN have victory over alcohol.

you and your kids deserve a sober you.

hhhmmm... you'll still be the same seflish person 24 hours from now, but
"I'd take the back door out but I can't do that to my kids."

youre not as selfish as you perceive.
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Old 07-01-2017, 10:39 AM
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Hey trips, many of us have spoke of the vicious cycle. It is indeed a thing, and deadly serious. It takes deadly serious dedication to break it. It can be done, and when accomplished will set you free like nothing you can imagine. It may seem like an insurmountable task, but its not, many of us here have done it and you can too. Wishing you the best.
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Old 07-01-2017, 02:58 PM
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Originally Posted by tripstotheedge View Post
I'd take the back door out but I can't do that to my kids. I'm so tired
There is ALWAYS hope! Even if you have to do things one moment at a time to begin with!

You came to the right place :-)
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Old 07-01-2017, 04:39 PM
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Originally Posted by tripstotheedge View Post
Can't do the programs. 24 hours from now, I'll be the selfish person I always am. Vicious cycle. I'm so weak and scared. I only push forward for my kids.
Donlt let yourself be talked out of change.

I drank for 20 years and never 'successfully' quit. Then I did, and I'm ten years sober now.

It may take change, it may talk energy and it may be the hardest thing you ever do, but I believe anyone can be sober, if they want to be.

The past need not be a determinant on the outcome this time.

For what its worth I don't believe you're anymore selfish than anyone else here - but sometimes maybe selfish sounds better than scared...

But - you're not alone. There's thousands of people here who want to help

whaddya say?

D
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Old 07-02-2017, 01:23 AM
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Originally Posted by tripstotheedge View Post
Can't do the programs. 24 hours from now, I'll be the selfish person I always am. Vicious cycle. I'm so weak and scared. I only push forward for my kids.
That's the AV talking, it's not the 'you' part of you. There's a little part of our reptile brain called the Beast that will always attempt to sabotage any effort to get sober because it loves the rush of being drunk. But you don't have to listen to that part of you. Certainly you go back to drinking because it's a habit. You can form new habits.

I decided to stop for good almost five years ago when I was already 43. Up til that point I don't think I'd strung together three sober days in a row in a decade. But I managed to change, and if I can do it anyone can.
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Old 07-02-2017, 01:50 AM
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Originally Posted by tripstotheedge View Post
Can't do the programs. 24 hours from now, I'll be the selfish person I always am. Vicious cycle. I'm so weak and scared. I only push forward for my kids.
There's lots of us here struggling at that age, and even much older. You obviously want to quit or you wouldn't be here. Read through all the threads and find some motivation...that's what I did. And don't be so hard on yourself.

I finished up day 4 today, and was able to take my kid out for do-nuts this morning instead of sleeping until noon. I know she was glad I'm not drunk today.

Stay strong and take care of you and yours.
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Old 07-02-2017, 09:59 AM
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One, getting sober is really, really hard. Two, you don't change overnight. Just start small. First, try not to drink. Just 24 hours. Hey, you're on the right path. You're reaching out for help. We've all been there. Slip ups, feeling like we're going crazy because we want to drink so bad. But it gets better. 20 months of sobriety and I still wake up almost every morning thankful I'm not hungover. But I still have a lot of work to do. And I still have to work at staying sober. But you can do it.
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Old 07-03-2017, 04:05 PM
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Trip,

I am 52 and I quit 2 years ago.

I had anxiety attacks and was starting to freak out.

The physical was bad, detox for me lasted about a month, but the mental part was/is hell.

I used to get drunk all the time just not steadily. I binged..sometimes in the am...sometimes in the pm.

I would be drunk right now for sure.

Instead, i am laying on my bed...alone. Thinking about what to do. Take a drive for a cup of coffee, watch some more tv...i already took a nap.

I also already worked out and had breakfast and lunch.

So that is sobriety. Totally, bored sometimes, but proud as heck that i will never pour booze down my hole again.

Booze is poison. Being a drunk is a toxic fantasy world. Get clean for your kids. Stay clean for you.

Drinking is a learned behavior. Unlearn it.

Thanks.
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Old 07-03-2017, 04:57 PM
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I'm 50 and I quit 4 1/2 years ago. Don't ever give up. Ever.
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Old 07-03-2017, 11:38 PM
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Just want to add my support. I never attempted to quit drinking , then a month after turning 55 , IDK but I became willing to get help. My way is with a 12 Step Program, the daily support here on SR, and my belief in a Higher Power. Taking daily action. Works for me, doesn't mean it's THE way. It's been 4-1/2 years. I'm good!!
Never too late ....really ...truly.
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Old 07-04-2017, 04:42 AM
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Hey there .. you can make the decision and seek help. Life will be so much better sober...

You gotta figure out the reason YOU want to quit... for me it was my health and wanting to LIVE for my kids.

I was done punishing my body and mind.

Please seek help... it is so hard doing it alone.
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Old 07-04-2017, 05:29 AM
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Originally Posted by tripstotheedge View Post
I'd take the back door out but I can't do that to my kids. I'm so tired
Wow - here since 2013 and 5 posts. A quiet man you are. Have you tried the Serenity Center in Columbia.? Their AA meetings are very different than many. Much more accepting of the relapser.

GOOD LUCK!
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Old 07-04-2017, 03:49 PM
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Quiet is good
A lot of folks prefer to read, and thats ok.

The more you post tho, the more we can help tripstotheedge
Hows it going?

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