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Day 4 and wrecking my life

Old 06-24-2017, 02:13 PM
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Day 4 and wrecking my life

I feel like I have severely wrecked my whole life by continuing to drink. I could have turned my life around 10 years ago and gone back to work. Now I am 50 with no chance of employment. I keep thinking about how severely I have stuffed up with everyone and I am now isolated and alone. Noone decent wants anything to do with me. I continuously chose alcohol over relationship s. My house is a wreck. It's all I have got now. I kept buying alcohol instead of new appliances like a cooktop or washing machine. At least all the bills are paid now.
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Old 06-24-2017, 02:19 PM
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Hi sweetichick...so glad you're here and reaching out 💜 well done on Day 4. Although your situation may feel insurmountable it's not...you can absolutely turn things around and have the life you desire x
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Old 06-24-2017, 02:36 PM
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Thanks Nova. It means a lot.
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Old 06-24-2017, 02:38 PM
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Hi Sweetichick - 50 is not old and you have plenty of time to turn your life around. Keep off the drink - get that house cleaned and start inviting people over for a coffee and show them the new you - You will get better XXX
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Old 06-24-2017, 03:25 PM
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Thanks Susie. I'm busy cleaning the oven after 5 years. I feel disgusted in myself.
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Old 06-24-2017, 03:26 PM
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With each passing day we get the chance to write a new future chapter to our life.

Day 4 is only the beginning, you can do this Sweetichick!!
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Old 06-24-2017, 03:33 PM
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sweetichick - if it helps, i haven't cleaned MY oven since we got the new range.....think that was 3 years ago?

think of the state of your physical house as a reflection of your "inner" house. both need attention. both need YOU to be fully engaged. your oven is a start. just like 4 days is a start. just keep going....you can't do your WHOLE house all in one day but if you take it step by step, day by day, room by room, you CAN. try to find the positive here. being sober and cleaning house are GOOD things. give yourself some credit, ok?
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Old 06-24-2017, 03:41 PM
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Take gentle care, sweetichick - be kind to yourself, take pleasure in the progress you are making
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Old 06-24-2017, 03:42 PM
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Hi sweetichick
Give yourself a chance to heal first = giving up alcohol is a huge change

I've accomplished more in the last 10 years than I did in the previous 20 - I reckon you'll be amazed at what you can accomplish too - but heal first, ok?

D
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Old 06-24-2017, 03:49 PM
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Thanks Anvil. Yes need to stay positive. Next is mowing the lawn. Aargh At least I am working off the anxiety. Day by day room by room sounds good.
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Old 06-24-2017, 04:23 PM
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eh, the grass ain't going anywhere! don't try to tackle it all in one day.....you'll just get frustrated. you could even make a schedule, if you want to get a bit Type A!!! lol give yourself time to take in a job well done.....a sober day is a productive day.
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Old 06-24-2017, 04:39 PM
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sweetichick, make a list of what needs to be done.
cross off as ya go.
what doesnt get done today, burn it.
seriously, now, what ya dont get done today wasnt supposed to get done.
dont sweat the small stuff
its all small stuff
if you cant run and you cant hide, go with the flow.
in other words
let it goooooooooooo.
easiest to let it goooooo when ya loosen up the grip.
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Old 06-24-2017, 04:41 PM
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"Noone decent wants anything to do with me. "

a huge round of,"gee,thanks" from us all.

i was decent once.
that was scarey.
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Old 06-24-2017, 04:50 PM
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Sweetichick, don't be so hard on yourself. You can change your life! I think making a list of things you want to do and listing ideas to help you accomplish some of those changes is a good idea. Continuing to stay sober is the most important thing. That will give you the chance you need to save money and make positive changes in your life.
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Old 06-24-2017, 05:23 PM
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Good idea. Don't sweat the small stuff. I have calmed down now after talking about it.
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Old 06-24-2017, 05:30 PM
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Its never ever too late to turn things around x x
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Old 06-24-2017, 05:35 PM
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I was 58 when I quit drinking. I'm now almost 66 and my life has never been better. It took me a while to get my life straightened out but I did it.
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Old 06-25-2017, 03:57 PM
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Originally Posted by tomsteve View Post
"Noone decent wants anything to do with me. "

a huge round of,"gee,thanks" from us all.

i was decent once.
that was scarey.
That's hilarious Tomsteve kept me laughing yesterday.
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Old 06-25-2017, 04:03 PM
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I ended up getting a lawnmower man.. cost enough but it was too long for me to mow. Never been so embarrassed in my life. I'm glad you guys said to take it easy. I took your advice and slowed down a bit. Today is day 5 with more cleaning. Tomorrow is payday so have to shake up my routine. Normally it's go shopping then to the pub. Any ideas welcome. Maybe a haircut instead.
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Old 06-25-2017, 04:21 PM
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When I was in treatment and then out of treatment (including at home on pass days) I'd burn myself out with trying to get stuff done yesterday.
A huge help was having a calendar with one goal for each day, if they were big then a block of days I guesstimated them to take.

Eventually that turned into a rolling list, where I'd prioritize the most important tasks at the top, decide to complete the least desirable, most important tasks first thing each morning. Stroke things off as I went.
I managed to get more and more things done and I felt better about myself.
Heck, if I did things like day to day things, say mowing grass, laundry, wash walls, clean dishes etc that seemed a little bigger than normal, I'd write it down just to cross it off

Whatever doesn't get done today goes on the list for tomorrow.

Agreed all around... be kind to yourself. Break the cycle of sickness. Start focusing on the things you desire in yourself and in life, less on the what you don't want.
You are cleaning up the clutter so you can now focus on the on-going project that is you and your life congratulate yourself! That is exciting stuff.
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