TreeFroggy29

:banghead: Well I'm new here and hoping someone on this site will be able to give me some advice. My boyfriend and I have been together a little over a year. It has been wonderful, everything I could hope for! Until this weekend. I woke up Sunday morning and he was gone. After all the phone calls, crying and a missing persons report he calls. He tells me he had a relapse. I've never dealt with this sort of stuff and don't know where to begin. He says he is going to get back on his ati-depressants and go to the counselor at the VA. How can I show support but not enable or encourage? We live together and I worry now about trusting him. This was just so out of the blue! I love him and want to be there for him, but I don't want that to be used against me either. It's just crazy, I never would have thought for a moment this was going to happen, were there signs that I missed? Any advice is appreciated......... Thanks.

Sherry Lassie

TreeFroggy29,

So sorry to hear of your shock and disappointment. I am no one to be giving advice, but if this is the first time he has relapsed since you have been with him and done something so outrageous, I would be supportive of him and try to help. If this behavior begins repeating itself, then you will have to re-evaluate this behavior and your own well being. Sometimes we just know when someone is using our love and caring nature for their own benefit. You will know if that feeling arises in the future.

I am new to this board too; just joined Monday. If he is like alot of us, he is more stunned by what he has done to himself and to you than you are. Especially if he thought he had this problem licked.

I hope some other SR senior members will respond to you and give you more informed advice.

Hang in there. I hope it works out for both of you.

Sherry Lassie

TreeFroggy29

Thanks Sherry. He seems just as upset, scared and disbelieving as I do. I hope we can get through this and back to normal. Thanks

Angelita

Hello Treefroggy29 Will Im new here to but I can tell u something.. If u show him how much love u have for him and u let him know you are there to suport him it will be a lot better for him to recover... My boyfriend is the one that is suporting me the most.. He was the one that took me to the NA meetings and knowing he is by my side has helped me a lot.. I would not know what to do without him.. so onece again.. be very suportive.. but always remember dont let NOONE bring u down!!
Angie.