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-   -   What do you do when you start feeling anxious and irritable? (https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/newcomers-recovery/411450-what-do-you-do-when-you-start-feeling-anxious-irritable.html)

Giraffegirl2013 06-19-2017 03:56 PM

What do you do when you start feeling anxious and irritable?
 
Day 32

I created an action plan with a daily schedule so I could have some sort of focus/structure in my life. Today was a tough day. There were so many distractions, time was going by very quickly and I felt like things kept popping up that I needed to do right then. Eventually I became irritated and anxious because I wasn't getting things done and felt like every time I sat down in a quiet place I was interrupted by something or someone.

How do you deal with distractions, especially when you feel yourself get irritable or anxious?

sobersolstice 06-19-2017 04:02 PM

I found a metal pipe near a tree, and smashed the bark off of it with every intention of knocking it down until I was exhausted.

Sometimes I do yelling and breathing exercises until someone calls the police lol.

january161992 06-19-2017 05:27 PM

great job on 30 days !

i call my sposor
exercise
and get to a meeting

:thanks

heres a chip for ya

https://i.ebayimg.com/thumbs/images/...nTO/s-l225.jpg

thomas11 06-19-2017 05:45 PM

There are techniques that can be learned to help you get through stressful and/or anxious times. I recommend picking up a book or searching the internet. I personally compartmentalize which is not always healthy, but I can block things out when I have to.

Anna 06-19-2017 05:45 PM

Congratulations on Day 32.

I had a lot of anger and anxiety in early recovery and it was hard to deal with. I found music helped a lot, as well as making time for myself to walk several miles in the early evening. I really had to put myself first in order to deal with those feelings. I know it's not easy, but find what works for you and make sure you take the time to care for yourself.

least 06-19-2017 06:37 PM

This may not be possible for you, in your situation, but my go-to solution for whatever ails me is to walk my dogs. :) The exercise and fresh air helps, and paying attention to my dogs takes the pressure off me.

ThatWasTheOldMe 06-19-2017 08:14 PM

For me personally:
I'm on Antabuse so I can't act on negative emotions with impulsive drinking.

I eat something. I watch a video. I find something to do. I work on my investment spreadsheets. I work on studying for an exam related to professional certification in my field. I go for a walk. I send out a resume. I clean something.

What matters is I don't drink.

ThatWasTheOldMe 06-19-2017 08:20 PM

I play with my cat. I read. I go for a drive. I go to a meeting. I talk to a friend.

NoahJ 06-20-2017 08:13 AM

Congratulations on 1 month! Being scheduled helped me out a lot.

I *try* to understand what makes feel anxious/irritable. Exercise, meditation, chores, work, a hobby - these all helped me a lot.

I also like to post from the guy who smashed the tree with a pipe. Sometimes you gotta just let it out.

Berrybean 06-20-2017 10:46 AM

For me there are a number of things I know helps...

1) check the HALT triggers and address any that may be rattling me.
2) pray and do some breathing exercises
3) talk to another alcoholic / get to a meeting
4) light exercise - walk similar
4) gratitude list to adjust my focus from the negative to the positive as much as is possible
5) help someone else (again, this shifts my focus from inward to outward looking
6) get on with doing the next best thing I can do. Even if it doesn't solve all the things I'm worrying about, it's far more positive than sitting procrastinating and watching the cycle go round in my washing-machine head.

August252015 06-20-2017 03:19 PM

In no particular order- esp for anxiety, I:

I nap or still sometimes do what I did for the first months and use the "Send Myself to Bed Early" techinque. 7p even, whatever gets me "quieted down."
I turn off my cell - let my fiance know I am going to do so and I just cut off the "noise."
Yoga- this is a recent thing in the past month, now 3-4x a week.
Text with my sponsor or another program friend - or call, depending on my mood and thoughts
Ice cream
I do have a med I take - 1-3x/day as needed. I used to feel impending anxiety by a "ramped up" feeling that would start, and take accordingly. Now, I usually start to feel something different, more like a tenseness or a distractedness.

I also keep regular meeting times, so that keeps me solid. Routine is very important to me so I make lists every day- and in the AM, that includes six specific (non meeting) recovery things. I cross them off every day- started this habit with my first sponsor, around 100 days, and still do it on the eve of 16 mo.

Take care of yourself.

Dee74 06-20-2017 03:33 PM

Exercise was good for me - I also wrote gratitude lists - all the things I was grateful for.

The more POed I got the harder that task was, but it usually grounded me again and helped me get over myself :)

D

Berrybean 06-20-2017 09:31 PM


Originally Posted by August252015 (Post 6505573)
... Routine is very important to me so I make lists every day- and in the AM, that includes six specific (non meeting) recovery things. I cross them off every day- started this habit with my first sponsor, around 100 days, and still do it on the eve of 16 mo.

Take care of yourself.

Hi August. Would you mind elaborating on this one just a little. The school long summer holidays will be starting in just over a month, and as much as the freedom I great it many ways, my routine does go out the window and I end up finding myself loafing about in my underwear til lunchtime, which would be fine if I enjoyed wasting time like that, but I don't. Your list and cross it off idea might help. What kind of stuff do you put on yours. I wonder if just basic self-care needs to be on mine, and getting out of the house, watering the plants etc. Does that sound like the kind of thing ?

BB

August252015 06-21-2017 01:02 AM


Originally Posted by Berrybean (Post 6505961)
Hi August. Would you mind elaborating on this one just a little. The school long summer holidays will be starting in just over a month, and as much as the freedom I great it many ways, my routine does go out the window and I end up finding myself loafing about in my underwear til lunchtime, which would be fine if I enjoyed wasting time like that, but I don't. Your list and cross it off idea might help. What kind of stuff do you put on yours. I wonder if just basic self-care needs to be on mine, and getting out of the house, watering the plants etc. Does that sound like the kind of thing ?

BB

Hey BB et al-

Sure.
The recovery-specific things are:
1 visit SR;
2 read daily devotional from this year's devotional, Jesus Today;
3 HALT check-in (how do I feel on waking? Hungry/Angry/Lonely/Tired? Sometimes I just cross this off and sometimes I make a note- eg, "too much ice cream last night!" ha);
4 read pp 84-88 and 417-418 of the Big Book (these pages are so well loved that I am one of those people who can see the words in my head and refer to them often, at least internally);
5 read the Richard Rohr daily email devotional (Friar Richard Rohr is a fave of mine- see https://cac.org/sign-up/);
6 Bible reading plan via an app (my boyfriend and I share this - it's cool because you can make notes on each other's readings, make verse images, all kinds of stuff- we've been doing plans for six months or so now- some are as short as 5 days and the longest one we did was 100!);

I am a dedicated AA-er - today is actually 16 mo sober. Not a "real" anniversary, but I still count days at least a few times a week and note each month! My sweet spot for meetings is 4-6 a week. I did about 82 in 90 when I first quit drinking; at first I almost always went to the noon meeting at a big clubhouse then at what has become my home group that meets MWF. Right now, with my work schedule and new commitment to a restaurant-industry recovery group (I'm a server) that I am leading, I am usually getting to 4 mtgs with one being that one, which is not AA.

I keep what we call the "Holy Day Planner" (it's an awesome book by Blue Sky that I got last year and just bought a new one for July 17-Jun 18) and on the daily pgs I note people to call, tasks to do -a prayer for the day or notes from a reading....I also note bank balances many days- I started this habit when I started working again and opened a main savings account (this is where I put money for my big bills and transfer once a month) and a second (I put 10% of what I make every shift here)....I had to start even more basic with "to do" lists- at first, it was maybe three things, ie 1 shower 2 eat twice 3 make the bed. Not kidding. Now, I put down reminders like "Cliff-walk dog 4p" when I am working and he needs to check on the doggus, comments on my yoga efforts this week, etc- I find satisfaction in concretes so noting accomplishments like "yoga abs - check" makes me happy.

Happy to elaborate more or answer questions for anyone. Just my little way of living in the world, as a happy recovering alcoholic.

Take care all
A

Zebra1275 06-21-2017 05:33 AM

Some good suggestions here. There are 100's of things you can do. Just don't drink.

NoahJ 06-21-2017 05:39 AM

I'm really grateful to come in to work and review this thread. Thanks to the OP. Yesterday evening, Post Acute Withdrawal Syndrome (PAWS) showed up and started kicking the sh*t out of me, and is continuing into this am. I'm 2 months sober, and while I've had some PAWS flareups, this current one really dialed it up to 11 on me out of nowhere (anxiety, shakes, negative racing thoughts, fatigue).

Since I can't go home and sleep, and my schedule can't accommodate AA today, I'm spending some time on SR, making a mental gratitude list, trying to eat well/stay hydrated, and later I'll go for a walk with a coworker and take 5 minutes to meditate. This too shall pass (how i hate that cliche, but its true!).

Nonsensical 06-21-2017 05:45 AM

1 Attachment(s)
Demolition Therapy:
Because something somewhere needs to be in smaller pieces. :)

DontRemember 06-21-2017 07:01 AM


Originally Posted by Nonsensical (Post 6506305)
Demolition Therapy:
Because something somewhere needs to be in smaller pieces. :)

:lmao

controlledburns 06-21-2017 07:06 AM

When I'm really anxious, if I can, I take a long, long walk. Walks help me clear my head the most. Otherwise if I can I do very meditative and repetitive things. Playing games on my phone like tetris, or recently I've started doing Perler bead portraits. I used to do them all the time when I was a kid, and I've noticed in the past that if I do something like that and get sucked into it, I don't focus on what's bothering me, be it cravings or whatever else. But there are soooo many repetitive things you can do.

DontRemember 06-21-2017 07:33 AM

When I was around 2 months sober, I bought a 'heavy bag'(punching bag)..anytime I'm 'stressed/anxious I go swing on it for a while..Really helps get out the frustration. They can be bought cheap used too. Pro tip: wear light weight gloves or your knuckles will bleed/bruise.


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