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-   -   Please Help to stop alcohol. I wanna live freely. (https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/newcomers-recovery/410755-please-help-stop-alcohol-i-wanna-live-freely.html)

STHATHEMMAD 06-04-2017 11:02 PM

Please Help to stop alcohol. I wanna live freely.
 
Hello everyone,
I don't know whether I am an addict or not. But, I want to stop consuming alcohol forever.
I started drinking about 8 years ago. Just after my school. We only had a small drink, About 1 drink with friends per month.
slowly it increased. And my best friend started drinking very frequently. He first started with drink in the weekend. But slowly it increased. So I also had drinks with him. I smoke too with him at drinks.
Then I started drinking with others slowly. specialy with university friends.
There after I had a job far away from home. We used to drink daily.
However now I am working nearby my home. But till I cant manage to get rid of alcohol. My Girl friend thinks I dont drink alcohol and no smoke. I cant cheat her anymore. I feel guilty. I want to confess to someone.
I am very dissapointed about me. I was not like this few years back.
I learnt very hard and became a university student. Those days I was very close to my religion (I am a Buddhist) . But now, very rarely I go to a temple.
Actually I am feeling guity. I wanna stop this. I hate the way I live. Seriously I hate the way I live.
I have many alcohol friends. So many of my friends know that i drink. So they allways call me for their parties. Its very hard to stay without drinking at those moments. And avoiding those functions are also very difficult.
little by litte]le, my parents get knowing things. Now they know I drink. I dont like it this way. I dont like to live this way. I wanna become a genuine man . Please Help.
Pleaase help!!!!

Time2Rise 06-05-2017 12:08 AM

Welcome STHAT. There is help here, so stick around and read deeply. Why not recommit to Buddhism? That would be a good start in my opinion. Do you meditate everyday? If not, why not start again, right now.

Time2Rise 06-05-2017 12:10 AM

Also, I recommend reading and posting on the Class of June support thread. Doing so will help you stay motivated. It's on this page.

Dee74 06-05-2017 12:15 AM

Hi and welcome STHATHEMMAD :)

You'll find a lot of support here :)

I despaired of never being able to quit drinking, but SR really helped me turn my life around.

I've been sober over 10 years now so if I can do it, you can too :)

Read around, post as much as you like, see what other p[eople are doimng- ask questions.

Try not to panic - you're among friends :)

D

Dee74 06-05-2017 12:17 AM

The June support thread others have mentioned is here:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...art-one-6.html
D

FreeOwl 06-05-2017 04:02 AM

Welcome to a good place.

Turn also back toward your faith, it will serve you well in sobriety.

You can do it. You can free yourself from the burden of alcohol.

Stick with us.

STHATHEMMAD 06-05-2017 04:45 AM


Originally Posted by Time2Rise (Post 6486058)
Welcome STHAT. There is help here, so stick around and read deeply. Why not recommit to Buddhism? That would be a good start in my opinion. Do you meditate everyday? If not, why not start again, right now.

/thank you a lot..
I dont meditate daily. actually I did so when I was studying. Those were my best days.
What type of meditation should I practice?
Any special type of meditation for this ?
:tyou:tyou:tyou

STHATHEMMAD 06-05-2017 04:57 AM

I had a surgery last year. So I had to bed rest for a months. In that period, I didn't do any alcohol.
But soon I recovered, I started again :(

STHATHEMMAD 06-05-2017 04:59 AM

Will having a pet be helpful? like a dog or a cat?

Time2Rise 06-05-2017 12:26 PM


Originally Posted by STHATHEMMAD (Post 6486193)
/thank you a lot..
I dont meditate daily. actually I did so when I was studying. Those were my best days.
What type of meditation should I practice?
Any special type of meditation for this ?
:tyou:tyou:tyou

What type of meditation does your Buddhist system teach? I personally use a version of mindful meditation, and I'm under the impression that all Buddhist sects used some type of mindful meditation. Personally, that's where I would start.

Time2Rise 06-05-2017 12:30 PM


Originally Posted by STHATHEMMAD (Post 6486210)
Will having a pet be helpful? like a dog or a cat?

IMO, you're getting ahead of yourself, so forget having a pet for now, you have more important issues to worry about for the next few months.

You should first develop a sobriety plan. Start here http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...very-plan.html

Also, are there any support groups like AA or SMART Recovery in your area? If so, you should at least attend a few meetings with an open mind.

Time2Rise 06-05-2017 12:31 PM


Originally Posted by STHATHEMMAD (Post 6486203)
I had a surgery last year. So I had to bed rest for a months. In that period, I didn't do any alcohol.
But soon I recovered, I started again :(

So you know you can stay sober if you really want to. That's good.

Dee74 06-05-2017 04:54 PM

how are you doing STHATHEMMAD?

D

STHATHEMMAD 06-05-2017 08:18 PM


Originally Posted by Dee74 (Post 6487087)
how are you doing STHATHEMMAD?

D

Hi,
Yesterday I started meditating. meditate 1 minutes yesterday. Sof far, everything is great.
thank you so much you for being here with me,

least 06-05-2017 09:04 PM

Welcome to the family. :) There's lots of support here so use it to help strengthen your sobriety. :)

KiKi0615 06-05-2017 10:28 PM

Welcome. You can do this. Stick close & read and post as much as you can!

STHATHEMMAD 06-06-2017 04:58 AM

My best friend is an alcoholic person. He drinks daily (or every other day). He is my best friend. we used to go out together.
I cant say no to him when he ask to go out...
But, I know this is what keeping me an alcoholic. I cant leave this friend. he is the best friend I have.
Can you advice me? Please. This is the bottle neck of my system; the critical point.
He smokes too.
I managed to say no for my other friensds (job mates peers etc.. ) But I cant suddenly say no to my best friend.
Please Advice. There should be a way to do this,

ScottFromWI 06-06-2017 10:26 AM


Originally Posted by STHATHEMMAD (Post 6487580)
I managed to say no for my other friensds (job mates peers etc.. ) But I cant suddenly say no to my best friend.
Please Advice. There should be a way to do this,

There is a way to do this - you simply say no. That's not to say that its easy to do..but it is something you will have to do if you are truly committed to getting sober. Getting sober requires serious changes in our lives, and some of those changes we won't like at all...nor will the people who are affected by them.

If this particular person insists on you drinking even after you've committed to quitting, they are not really a true friend.

Time2Rise 06-06-2017 12:07 PM

Suggest to your friend that you have coffee, lunch or dinner instead. Or maybe a movie or sporting event. Anything that isn't centered around drinking.

And as Scott pointed out above, if he insists you drink even though he knows you're attempting sobriety, he may not be a true friend. However, I would take the time to explain why it's inappropriate for him to insist you drink.

You may find this article helpful: https://www.rethinkingdrinking.niaaa...al-Skills.aspx

thomas11 06-06-2017 12:43 PM

If he's truly a friend, you should be able to tell him what you've told us here and he should respect that and support you. If he does not, well then he is just a drinking buddy.

STHATHEMMAD 06-06-2017 10:45 PM

He called me yester day 3 times. In the evening. I didnt answer the phone. I will tell him that I didnt see the phone. i
So its day 03 for me. No alcohol, no smoke, totally free.
Thank you all, I need you all.

STHATHEMMAD 06-06-2017 10:56 PM

[QUOTE=Time2Rise;6487990]Suggest to your friend that you have coffee, lunch or dinner instead. Or maybe a movie or sporting event. Anything that isn't centered around drinking.

And as Scott pointed out above, if he insists you drink even though he knows you're attempting sobriety, he may not be a true friend. However, I would take the time to explain why it's inappropriate for him to insist you drink.

]

Thanks a lot for the article!!! Very helpful. :tyou

Time2Rise 06-07-2017 12:12 AM

[QUOTE=STHATHEMMAD;6488678]

Originally Posted by Time2Rise (Post 6487990)
Suggest to your friend that you have coffee, lunch or dinner instead. Or maybe a movie or sporting event. Anything that isn't centered around drinking.

And as Scott pointed out above, if he insists you drink even though he knows you're attempting sobriety, he may not be a true friend. However, I would take the time to explain why it's inappropriate for him to insist you drink.

]

Thanks a lot for the article!!! Very helpful. :tyou

Glad it helped STHAT.

STHATHEMMAD 06-07-2017 04:00 AM

I have a wedding to go on fri day. All my best friends come there. I am gonna test my self by stayting sober on fri day among them :) :)
wish me luck guys!

STHATHEMMAD 06-09-2017 12:13 PM


Originally Posted by STHATHEMMAD (Post 6488818)
I have a wedding to go on fri day. All my best friends come there. I am gonna test my self by stayting sober on fri day among them :) :)
wish me luck guys!

yeahhhhhhhhhhhh I made ittttttt:scoregood

Dee74 06-09-2017 04:44 PM

Awesome! :c014:

D

Time2Rise 06-09-2017 11:06 PM


Originally Posted by STHATHEMMAD (Post 6491918)
yeahhhhhhhhhhhh I made ittttttt:scoregood

Well done STHAT.

STHATHEMMAD 06-11-2017 05:58 AM

Successfully completed a week ������ !!!
Thank you all!!!

Time2Rise 06-11-2017 11:22 AM


Originally Posted by STHATHEMMAD (Post 6493748)
Successfully completed a week ������ !!!
Thank you all!!!

Great, stay strong and stay sober for another week.

STHATHEMMAD 06-12-2017 02:58 AM


Originally Posted by Time2Rise (Post 6494077)
Great, stay strong and stay sober for another week.

NO NO not just another week !!!
Life time!!!
Please don't tell like " another week, another month" Coz whenever I reach the target I feel I have a right to take a drink. So I dont keep milestones.

Wanna be sober forever.
Thanks a lot for the support :thanks


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