I finally left him.
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Join Date: Jun 2017
Posts: 1
I finally left him.
4 years of love, dedication, patience and hope I finally left. Domestic violence was the last straw. He would accuse me for his addiction. I actually believe it. It's only been a week and I cannot stop crying. His love for meth was stronger than his love for me. He's promised recovery and rehab. But he never goes through with any of his promises. I just need some advice I know I cannot go back and I won't but how do I get through this? I cry and I get physically sick daily. My life has become unmanageable. He gambled away all of our money. I just couldn't handle it. He's put me down emotionally multiple times a day. I know I don't deserve it. By maybe I do? I just don't know. 
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Join Date: Dec 2015
Location: NSW - Australia
Posts: 14,586
You don't deserve to be treated this way Crystal.
I'm feeling so sick and tired myself today so have so little to offer except my deep belief that if things have degenerated to domestic violence and he is not doing anything to change you have made the right decision, even if painful.
It is not your fault!
Please keep posting here and the members of Family and Friends will have heaps of ongoing support to offer.
My love to you Crystal xxx
I'm feeling so sick and tired myself today so have so little to offer except my deep belief that if things have degenerated to domestic violence and he is not doing anything to change you have made the right decision, even if painful.
It is not your fault!
Please keep posting here and the members of Family and Friends will have heaps of ongoing support to offer.
My love to you Crystal xxx
Member
Join Date: Jun 2016
Location: Adelaide, Australia
Posts: 28,663
Crystal, addiction sucks. You do not. Are you safe? First priority. Next do you need to see a doctor about the DV, if injured? Also police- restraining order, locks..? A counsellor is a very good idea- there should be a DV service, hotline- centre you can tap into - via the net- or check the sticky's in SR. Addiction really is crap. Empathy and support to you.
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Join Date: Aug 2012
Posts: 3,777
You will get through this. The tears and emotions will subside. Its time to focus on yourself and the next best move to get your life back on track. Its never okay for someone to hit you or emotionally and mentally abuse you. You deserve to live a healthy loving life. You can do this.
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Join Date: Sep 2015
Location: America
Posts: 4,136
Originally Posted by Crystal89 
4 years of love, dedication, patience and hope I finally left. Domestic violence was the last straw. He would accuse me for his addiction. I actually believe it. It's only been a week and I cannot stop crying. His love for meth was stronger than his love for me. He's promised recovery and rehab. But he never goes through with any of his promises. I just need some advice I know I cannot go back and I won't but how do I get through this? I cry and I get physically sick daily. My life has become unmanageable. He gambled away all of our money. I just couldn't handle it. He's put me down emotionally multiple times a day. I know I don't deserve it. By maybe I do? I just don't know.
It's a painful truth when you come to know they love their drug and addiction more than they love you. Or they are ensnared in something that holds so much POWER over them. Very painful. I want to somehow let you know that while pain is hard to cope with, there can be pain RELIEF. And, we may not think we will ever find pain relief. You've already started to relieve your pain by coming here and reaching out; a cry for help.
Your cries are very much heard, Crystal.
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Join Date: Mar 2017
Location: Colorado
Posts: 1,298
You did the right thing even though it hurts. When some time passes you will begin to heal, but it will always be a scar. But you will know you did what was best because your life will be healthier. Addiction is a thief and it will steal everything it can. Be strong and take lots of deep breaths!
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