Where/How to begin?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2017
Posts: 39
Where/How to begin?
Not sober - I want out of this prison! I found your site - PTL! I ordered some books from Amazon- not here yet. I don't want to go to detox but really appreciate all your advice about being careful. I may try to taper or use Xanax. I haven't talked to my husband yet. He loves me - enables me. He loves how social I am when drinking. I make friends with everyone! (Next day I don't remember and have photos on my phone if people I don't remember.)
My mother and sister both almost died from alcohol addiction- liver failure. Both were able to survive but were so close to death - couldn't walk or talk. So here I am - guess it's a family tradition.
How do I begin? Do I throw all the liquor away? Start by educating myself? What has worked for you all? By the way, I'm 57 and been drinking heavily for 12 years. Thank you!
My mother and sister both almost died from alcohol addiction- liver failure. Both were able to survive but were so close to death - couldn't walk or talk. So here I am - guess it's a family tradition.
How do I begin? Do I throw all the liquor away? Start by educating myself? What has worked for you all? By the way, I'm 57 and been drinking heavily for 12 years. Thank you!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Lakeside, Ca
Posts: 10,208
Originally Posted by Karen22 
How do I begin? Do I throw all the liquor away? Start by educating myself? What has worked for you all? By the way, I'm 57 and been drinking heavily for 12 years. Thank you!
Share all with your husband.
Do you think that you are a drunk ?
If so ? It's serious and your husband needs to support your sobriety.
M-Bob
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2017
Posts: 39
Originally Posted by Mountainmanbob
Getting the liquor out of the house could be of help.
Share all with your husband.
Do you think that you are a drunk ?
If so ? It's serious and your husband needs to support your sobriety.
M-Bob
Share all with your husband.
Do you think that you are a drunk ?
If so ? It's serious and your husband needs to support your sobriety.
M-Bob
Member
Join Date: Mar 2017
Location: Colorado
Posts: 1,298
Welcome Karen! This is a great place! Yes cleaning the liquor out and getting your husband on board are very important. Keep reading and learning here. We all need help dealing with our AV. Especially the first few weeks. I look forward to hearing more. Stay strong.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2017
Posts: 1,476
Hi Karen,
Great decision! I'm only a few years younger than you and I've been sober (this time) for 3 months. I do not go to AA, although I have been in the past and learned a lot from my time there. Currently I am using SR, an addiction therapist, regular exercise, vitamins, my tools/plan and my HPs.
First thing I did was get rid of all the booze in our home and made a committed to myself to not drink each day. Then, I came to SR daily (many times a day), wrote in my journal and braced myself for the withdrawals (mine lasted 7-10 days). If you feel that you need to see a doctor before the withdrawal period, do so...as they can be dangerous.
Once I was feeling better, I began working out regularly. SR provided me with the support and knowledge I needed to begin creating my recovery plan (which is constantly being updated) and my therapist helps me work through the snarls along the way.
3 months is generally where I used to relapse. I can honestly say that I feel confident that I am on the right track. The cravings come and go, I have good days and bad days, but I am so grateful to be where I am today.
Don't over think it or complicate it...just don't drink today. The rest will come as you move forward.
Great decision! I'm only a few years younger than you and I've been sober (this time) for 3 months. I do not go to AA, although I have been in the past and learned a lot from my time there. Currently I am using SR, an addiction therapist, regular exercise, vitamins, my tools/plan and my HPs.
First thing I did was get rid of all the booze in our home and made a committed to myself to not drink each day. Then, I came to SR daily (many times a day), wrote in my journal and braced myself for the withdrawals (mine lasted 7-10 days). If you feel that you need to see a doctor before the withdrawal period, do so...as they can be dangerous.
Once I was feeling better, I began working out regularly. SR provided me with the support and knowledge I needed to begin creating my recovery plan (which is constantly being updated) and my therapist helps me work through the snarls along the way.
3 months is generally where I used to relapse. I can honestly say that I feel confident that I am on the right track. The cravings come and go, I have good days and bad days, but I am so grateful to be where I am today.
Don't over think it or complicate it...just don't drink today. The rest will come as you move forward.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,378
If it was me I would make your house a dry house. Before that tho, I'd speak to your husband - let him now that drinkings not fun for you despite appearances and that you're serious about not drinking.
Use the support here too - there's a mountain of it
D
Use the support here too - there's a mountain of it
D
Gratitude Gardener
Join Date: May 2017
Posts: 278
Hi there, and welcome! Youve made a brave and beautiful first step! Here is what I say: You have to throw it all away when you are ready too.
The only catch there is that some people arent ready till they are dead. So... you need to ask yourself: Whats the big deal with throwing it away?
It could save your life.
You know that you are doing some damage. All the scary warning signs are flashing in your face, front and center.
Maybe go ahead and give full-on-sobriety a go NOW.
If you choose to do that NOW, here's what you can do to start:
Throw it all away tonight.
Stay online with us as often as possible, all night if you need to, or whenever you need to. Talk to people here OFTEN... about EVERYTHING you are feeling. Listen to what the others say. We are all super understanding and accepting. We have ALL been where you are.
You are not alone.
And, yes, go find and AA meeting if you feel you need that community support.
But no matter what, stay close to us. We are here 24/7 to talk, to get support from YOU possibly in a few days from now..., and to GIVE support to YOU for as many hours, days, months and years you need it.
Life without alcohol seems very daunting.
But all you need to do is talk to others like you here, and often, and DONT DRINK TODAY.
Just today. Dont drink today. Deal with tomorrow when tomorrow comes.
One day at a time.
I am only on day 2, but it feels so much better today than a hangover does.
Stay strong. Read lots of posts, and communicate.
I am holding on for dear life to this site. I really want it to stick this time.
All the best,
H
The only catch there is that some people arent ready till they are dead. So... you need to ask yourself: Whats the big deal with throwing it away?
It could save your life.
You know that you are doing some damage. All the scary warning signs are flashing in your face, front and center.
Maybe go ahead and give full-on-sobriety a go NOW.
If you choose to do that NOW, here's what you can do to start:
Throw it all away tonight.
Stay online with us as often as possible, all night if you need to, or whenever you need to. Talk to people here OFTEN... about EVERYTHING you are feeling. Listen to what the others say. We are all super understanding and accepting. We have ALL been where you are.
You are not alone.
And, yes, go find and AA meeting if you feel you need that community support.
But no matter what, stay close to us. We are here 24/7 to talk, to get support from YOU possibly in a few days from now..., and to GIVE support to YOU for as many hours, days, months and years you need it.
Life without alcohol seems very daunting.
But all you need to do is talk to others like you here, and often, and DONT DRINK TODAY.
Just today. Dont drink today. Deal with tomorrow when tomorrow comes.
One day at a time.
I am only on day 2, but it feels so much better today than a hangover does.
Stay strong. Read lots of posts, and communicate.
I am holding on for dear life to this site. I really want it to stick this time.
All the best,
H
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,531
Hello Karen! I'm so glad you've decided to get free of it.
I was older when I quit too. I spent too many years dreading letting go of it - trying desperately to control how much I drank. In the end, it was never fun anymore, & had become a necessity. I once thought life would be dull & monotonous without it - but I had become boring by being numb & foggy most of the time. We don't need it! Welcome to a friendly & encouraging place.
I was older when I quit too. I spent too many years dreading letting go of it - trying desperately to control how much I drank. In the end, it was never fun anymore, & had become a necessity. I once thought life would be dull & monotonous without it - but I had become boring by being numb & foggy most of the time. We don't need it! Welcome to a friendly & encouraging place.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2017
Posts: 39
Thank you for welcoming me- tears! Also - high as a kite. I'm sorry - I'm not sure of the rules - trying not to offend or set anyone back. Throwing away thousands of dollars of wine and liquor- I know! I have to - but can't I drink some of the best and then dispose?! Again - I am so sorry if U sorry be disingenuous- I SO want and need to stop! How - how - what did you do?!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2017
Posts: 39
Big soirée last night - Had a blast - danced all night - made so many great new friends! So what's the problem?! I'm a drunk - don't remember half of it - embarrassed about blacking out - again! Hubby calls it "falling asleep" - bless his sweet enabling heart! I am so over this! Please - please - please tell me how you began?
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Ma
Posts: 3,553
You can not offend or set any of us back,Karen.
We have been there, and want you to be with us on the other side.
A path that leads to well being and a life that is free from alcohol and drugs.
Not a path that leads to ultimate destruction.
You will find that there is fun and joy socializing without being inebriated.
And your husband will see that it's your spirit, not that alcohol that leads people to become friends with you.
Stay close by, we are always here to talk with.
And when you are ready to quit, this site will help you reach the goal.
As it did for me.
We have been there, and want you to be with us on the other side.
A path that leads to well being and a life that is free from alcohol and drugs.
Not a path that leads to ultimate destruction.
You will find that there is fun and joy socializing without being inebriated.
And your husband will see that it's your spirit, not that alcohol that leads people to become friends with you.
Stay close by, we are always here to talk with.
And when you are ready to quit, this site will help you reach the goal.
As it did for me.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2017
Posts: 39
Originally Posted by resolute50
You can not offend or set any of us back,Karen.
We have been there, and want you to be with us on the other side.
A path that leads to well being and a life that is free from alcohol and drugs.
Not a path that leads to ultimate destruction.
You will find that there is fun and joy socializing without being inebriated.
And your husband will see that it's your spirit, not that alcohol that leads people to become friends with you.
Stay close by, we are always here to talk with.
And when you are ready to quit, this site will help you reach the goal.
As it did for me.
We have been there, and want you to be with us on the other side.
A path that leads to well being and a life that is free from alcohol and drugs.
Not a path that leads to ultimate destruction.
You will find that there is fun and joy socializing without being inebriated.
And your husband will see that it's your spirit, not that alcohol that leads people to become friends with you.
Stay close by, we are always here to talk with.
And when you are ready to quit, this site will help you reach the goal.
As it did for me.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2017
Posts: 39
Originally Posted by Zebra1275
Show up at an AA meeting?
Yep. That's a good start. Raise your hand if they ask if anybody is at their first meeting. They will help your from there.
Also, log onto this website everyday and read and post.
Yep. That's a good start. Raise your hand if they ask if anybody is at their first meeting. They will help your from there.
Also, log onto this website everyday and read and post.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2017
Posts: 39
Originally Posted by herculana
Listen to Resolute's message above. He's RIGHT ON THE MONEY. I hope you will read it again tomorrow, and maybe you'll choose to make tomorrow DAY 1 .
We are here for you. We arent going away.
We are here for you. We arent going away.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2017
Posts: 39
Originally Posted by herculana
Hi there, and welcome! Youve made a brave and beautiful first step! Here is what I say: You have to throw it all away when you are ready too.
The only catch there is that some people arent ready till they are dead. So... you need to ask yourself: Whats the big deal with throwing it away?
It could save your life.
You know that you are doing some damage. All the scary warning signs are flashing in your face, front and center.
Maybe go ahead and give full-on-sobriety a go NOW.
If you choose to do that NOW, here's what you can do to start:
Throw it all away tonight.
Stay online with us as often as possible, all night if you need to, or whenever you need to. Talk to people here OFTEN... about EVERYTHING you are feeling. Listen to what the others say. We are all super understanding and accepting. We have ALL been where you are.
You are not alone.
And, yes, go find and AA meeting if you feel you need that community support.
But no matter what, stay close to us. We are here 24/7 to talk, to get support from YOU possibly in a few days from now..., and to GIVE support to YOU for as many hours, days, months and years you need it.
Life without alcohol seems very daunting.
But all you need to do is talk to others like you here, and often, and DONT DRINK TODAY.
Just today. Dont drink today. Deal with tomorrow when tomorrow comes.
One day at a time.
I am only on day 2, but it feels so much better today than a hangover does.
Stay strong. Read lots of posts, and communicate.
I am holding on for dear life to this site. I really want it to stick this time.
All the best,
H
The only catch there is that some people arent ready till they are dead. So... you need to ask yourself: Whats the big deal with throwing it away?
It could save your life.
You know that you are doing some damage. All the scary warning signs are flashing in your face, front and center.
Maybe go ahead and give full-on-sobriety a go NOW.
If you choose to do that NOW, here's what you can do to start:
Throw it all away tonight.
Stay online with us as often as possible, all night if you need to, or whenever you need to. Talk to people here OFTEN... about EVERYTHING you are feeling. Listen to what the others say. We are all super understanding and accepting. We have ALL been where you are.
You are not alone.
And, yes, go find and AA meeting if you feel you need that community support.
But no matter what, stay close to us. We are here 24/7 to talk, to get support from YOU possibly in a few days from now..., and to GIVE support to YOU for as many hours, days, months and years you need it.
Life without alcohol seems very daunting.
But all you need to do is talk to others like you here, and often, and DONT DRINK TODAY.
Just today. Dont drink today. Deal with tomorrow when tomorrow comes.
One day at a time.
I am only on day 2, but it feels so much better today than a hangover does.
Stay strong. Read lots of posts, and communicate.
I am holding on for dear life to this site. I really want it to stick this time.
All the best,
H
Throw it away?! I want to - just not ready - crazy I know ! Thank you for helping me! Blessings!! 💖
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Ma
Posts: 3,553
It can be quit hard and even dangerous to quit drinking. Especially if you've been at it for many years.
I stopped cold turkey back in 2009 for 14 months. The first 3 days I had terrible insomnia and sweated till my blankets were soaked.
Thought I could "maintain" and fell back in a bottle till 2011.
Then I could only manage a month then>>>> back to square one.
Repeat over at least 3x.
In 2013 I made a plan to quit.
Asked God to help me break the bonds once and for all.
That Friday, (weekend)as I knew I was in for at least 3 days of hell I stopped.
3 Days of no sleep at all.
Sweat soaked sheets in the morning.
A general feeling like I was going to die.
I got past it.
Never looked back and this July it will be 4 years.
This site helped me get through some of the rough times.
It can for you as well, Karen.
But, if you need more,do whatever is necessary.
And live a life more abundantly.
I stopped cold turkey back in 2009 for 14 months. The first 3 days I had terrible insomnia and sweated till my blankets were soaked.
Thought I could "maintain" and fell back in a bottle till 2011.
Then I could only manage a month then>>>> back to square one.
Repeat over at least 3x.
In 2013 I made a plan to quit.
Asked God to help me break the bonds once and for all.
That Friday, (weekend)as I knew I was in for at least 3 days of hell I stopped.
3 Days of no sleep at all.
Sweat soaked sheets in the morning.
A general feeling like I was going to die.
I got past it.
Never looked back and this July it will be 4 years.
This site helped me get through some of the rough times.
It can for you as well, Karen.
But, if you need more,do whatever is necessary.
And live a life more abundantly.
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