Day 11 and stressed
 

Ok Day 11 think I'm doing great actually like the way I feel so much I can't believe it. Mornings are great not dragging all day. Just to vent my husband gets texts from some women at work which I have spoke to him about and told him that I am very uncomfortable with it. I guess it really hurts my feelings that after a year it still continues on and off as every discussion and/or argument has stemmed from this situation. I know if the tables were turned he would be infuriated if I was getting texts from some man. So now I have these anxious hurt feelings and no booze to kill it. Nor do I want to drink to kill it just trying to work my way through it and feel seriously sad about it.

Thanks for listening.

Just remember, no matter how crappy the situation, booze is never the answer. I've had to repeat that to myself many times.
Hope you can work things out!

Go for a long walk if you can. There is really no better antidote.

It isn't about the texts as what they represent...disrespect to you and him choosing an ego fix over your feelings.

He may also be using them subconsciously as a way to get back at you for the drinking chaos? Marriage counseling could help sort that out at some point, but first, you need to get more sober time and get your head and emotions healed more. I was all over the place the first six months.

Don't let it become the thing your addiction convinces you to relapse over. Drinking at problems is like throwing kerosene on a fire to try to put it out.

Walk. Breathe.

So on the money... I feel that he doesn't respect my feelings and it really hurts.
I don't think it's about drinking he drinks ... but ego very likely I guess. She's 20+ years younger so that makes it even worse.

However, I feel way more in control of my emotions without the booze. So I will keep fighting the good fight.

Congratulations on day 11 but at this point, stress and anxiety are going to be part of your days for a bit. Like the advice above; relax, breath. Try your best to avoid causes of stress. I know that can seem impossible but try to keep in mind that right now, you must be selfish in a way. What is going on with other people has got to take a back seat to your number one priority right now, which is continuing on your sobriety. Save your life before worrying about saving anything else. Without the first, there won't be any need to save the last.

It takes a little time to learn to deal with life without 'taking the edge off' but it's not only possible...it's preferable JD.

I like being present and I like solving problems without running away from them.

Hang in there :)

D