A quick general apology
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 2,950
A quick general apology
I have to say I'm sorry for the way I was behaving to a few of you last evening.. because I was drinking and being very defensive about it. No one deserves that, especially when they are sincerely trying to help one another.
Today was interesting, and not all bad, and definitely gave me some motivation to work on trying to be better, little by little.
Today was interesting, and not all bad, and definitely gave me some motivation to work on trying to be better, little by little.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 2,950
I am not drinking right now. And I'm really drained, because I had an intense day and I wish I had treated myself right the previous night because it would have been a far more enjoyable day.. It's moments when I feel like this, that I have no more energy to expend, that I want to numb myself and hit the off switch on my brain. There were moments today that I felt joy, something I have not felt in a long time.. I am seeing a glimpse of a brighter future for myself that is full of that joy and I am stuck in this fear of ruining the chances of that happening.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 2,950
Originally Posted by Shitzupuppy 
Great! Can you do something soothing for yourself? A bath or even just close your eyes for 15 minutes. See yourself in that brighter future. It's yours to take!
I so wanted another cup of coffee, but I just know it would make me twice as edgy and more liable to run out and seek something to suppress my nervous system, taxing it even more. My poor heart, I'm not even joking, I feel sure I've done damage to it.
Breathing in..... breathing out.....
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 8,637
Cool.
Just remember; apologies are easy.
The really good stuff is character change.
Nobody here really needs an apology. We've made so many of them ourselves we've become numb to them.
What would be really impressive and wonderful would be to watch you embrace sobriety and grow a beautiful life.
No apology necessary....
(PS - You Totally Can)
Just remember; apologies are easy.
The really good stuff is character change.
Nobody here really needs an apology. We've made so many of them ourselves we've become numb to them.
What would be really impressive and wonderful would be to watch you embrace sobriety and grow a beautiful life.
No apology necessary....
(PS - You Totally Can)
Member
Join Date: Feb 2016
Location: middle of nowhere
Posts: 2,849
Brenda, agree with Free Owl. We've all been there.
Coming clean is always good. At least you can see where you were at and admit the problems.
I think forgiving yourself and being kind to yourself is more important than apologizing?
What's done yesterday is done, what do you think you can do moving forward to take care of yourself and stay on the right path?
Coming clean is always good. At least you can see where you were at and admit the problems.
I think forgiving yourself and being kind to yourself is more important than apologizing?
What's done yesterday is done, what do you think you can do moving forward to take care of yourself and stay on the right path?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 2,950
I was talking in circles and barely making sense, really. And you can see it clearly when you sober up.. and I would be more embarrassed if I didn't apologize, if I just went along as if nothing had happened and I did nothing wrong.
I do need to expand my support system, and it needs to include face to face accountability. It's so easy for me to act wrong and deny realities when I do not have to look at the people I'm talking to or who are trying to talk to me.
Walk was short because it IS hot and I have not been active lately! I got me some soda pop, the gratuitously sugary kind. A&W root beer (heaven in a bottle) and Cherikee Red just because. But I'm disappointed, this red stuff doesn't taste near as good as I remember it from childhood.
I think the sugar is helping with the symptoms though. Heart stopped thudding.
I do need to expand my support system, and it needs to include face to face accountability. It's so easy for me to act wrong and deny realities when I do not have to look at the people I'm talking to or who are trying to talk to me.
Walk was short because it IS hot and I have not been active lately! I got me some soda pop, the gratuitously sugary kind. A&W root beer (heaven in a bottle) and Cherikee Red just because. But I'm disappointed, this red stuff doesn't taste near as good as I remember it from childhood.
I think the sugar is helping with the symptoms though. Heart stopped thudding.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 6,902
Hugs to you BC. It is difficult to break the cycle of fear and take the emotional risk of letting people in and building those important networks of support. But it's worth it when we do.
Here's hoping you'll stay sober and add those important things to your recovery toolkit. Love and prayers coming to you from the rainy Isle of the Eels.
Xxx
Here's hoping you'll stay sober and add those important things to your recovery toolkit. Love and prayers coming to you from the rainy Isle of the Eels.
Xxx
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
