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Class of May 2017 Support Thread Part One

Old 05-02-2017, 04:05 PM
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Closing in on the end of Day 3 and this has been a real tricky day for me in the past. In fact, the odd days are a problem for some reason.

I stopped at the store to pick up some groceries and as I was walking out to my car I realized it never occurred to me to even look at the alcohol. That made me pretty happy, but then, there I was, thinking about a drink. Ugh!

It took everything inside me to not go to another store because I needed tortilla chips ( of course I didn't need tortilla chips) because I knew I would grab some wine or whatever.

So, I decided to log in and see what was going on and have been here for about 20 minutes or so and am STILL fighting the urge.

I am reading This Naked Mind and just this morning read the chapter that talks about alcohol being a poison. I just keep telling myself that I would never willingly take poison so why would I want a drink? I'm also a breast cancer survivor and there is a link between breast cancer and drinking. I knew that, but I didn't know why and this book explained it which for some reason really made the fact click. I haven't researched the details but plan to tonight.

Phew...I think I'm good now. Ready to put on my pj's and settle down with my pups. Thanks for listening and let's just keep taking is one day at a time. Or in my case tonight, one hour at a time...
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Old 05-02-2017, 05:11 PM
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Add me to the list of those of us who are joining yet another monthly group.
Day 2. Tired of feeling this way. It's horrendous and not worth it at all. Have a good day, all and remember you do not drink anymore!
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Old 05-02-2017, 05:25 PM
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Just popping in from the May of 2016 class to say hello One year ago I signed up for sobriety and the May class & SR became my sober lifeline. Early sobriety can be a bumpy road so post away during the tough times, lean on each other, and never, ever give up because living a life recovered is so worth it
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Old 05-02-2017, 08:16 PM
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Hi everyone, I would like to join please. I was in the April 2017 class, among many others. This past Sunday was day 7 and I drank, and that night has turned into 3. I need to stop it now or it will just keep going. Tomorrow is day 1.
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Old 05-03-2017, 01:04 AM
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Originally Posted by ZenButterfly View Post
What do you think of Baclofen? I got Naltrexone but read recently that Baclofen might be better for cravings.
Hi ya im on baclofen and campral. The baclofen works diffrently than Naltrexone as B is a muscle relaxant which i find helps and the N is Opiod which stops the pleasure of alcohol and other things.

I have had problem with being tired on baclofen so im on low dose just to help me.

Anyway i hope that helps you hun. xx

day 51 for me xx
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Old 05-03-2017, 01:07 AM
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welcome Ask noneever and Emme

D
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Old 05-03-2017, 04:52 AM
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Originally Posted by emme99 View Post
Hi everyone, I would like to join please. I was in the April 2017 class, among many others. This past Sunday was day 7 and I drank, and that night has turned into 3. I need to stop it now or it will just keep going. Tomorrow is day 1.
Welcome, Emme. Try to post when you're struggling...it really helped me last night just to air my thoughts.
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Old 05-03-2017, 05:18 AM
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On to Day 4 after an extremely rough evening yesterday. I'm sleeping great, so that really helps as one of my triggers is fatigue.

One of the things I'm doing this time around is working actively on my recovery plan every day. So far, I've identified 3 triggers and using the SMART Recovery ABCs method, have documented them. If you haven't seen it, please check out the link here on SR. I chose to start with the ABCs and so far, it's working well. Here's the link in case anyone is interested:

SMART RecoveryŽ - Tool Chest and Homework

I'm also reading This Naked Mind. Others have posted about how it helped them and I wanted to see what it was all about. It's having a huge impact on changing my mindset and was very helpful when I was fighting an urge last night. It was so funny yesterday at work, when during a presentation, a graphic used in the book popped up on the screen! I had to do a double take but it was the exact graphic from the book, LOL! Hopefully, this means there is some merit to the thought process in the book.

Does anyone here have a recovery plan? Maybe we can share about what methods we're using to work this program? If you haven't started one, just try the ABC method for one of your triggers and perhaps share it here.

Let's do everything we can to pass this class!

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Old 05-03-2017, 05:21 AM
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Don't know what Day 1 (Round X) seemed so hard. Maybe it was the usual headache around happy hour telling me to drink. I sat parked in front of the liquor store for 20 minutes before pulling away. Went back to the office to get some work done and my wife surprised me by brining some dinner. At first I said, "Checking up on me?" which didn't go over well. I'm glad I stayed away from my 99c Schnapps. It would of made that surprise visit a disaster.

Slept better but getting some random anxiety this morning. I have a double shot of help later today, first session with a new counselor and a SMART meeting.

Why is the first day so damn hard? I'm a little pissed, I should be almost a month down but screwed up.

jk
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Old 05-03-2017, 05:31 AM
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Thought I would start by sharing one of my ABCs.

A (Activating Situation) - Fatigue

B( Irrational belief I have about A) - When I feel tired (especially in the middle of the day) I need to sleep. But the only way I can fall asleep and relax is if I have a drink.

C ( Consequences of having those beliefs) -
When I drink in the middle of the day to sleep, I end up losing most of the afternoon.
My evening is shot, because I still feel the effects of the alcohol.
I accomplish nothing the from the time I doze off until it's time for bed.
My sleep at night is disturbed, if I can sleep at all, thus resulting in being fatigued the next day.

D ( Dispute the irrational beliefs in B by turning them into questions and answers)
Q -Why do I think I need to sleep when I'm groggy?
A-Many people work through being tired without taking a nap so I can too.

Q - Why do I think I need a drink to fall asleep?
A - If I'm truly tired, I'll fall asleep on my own without the help of alcohol.

E (Effective new thinking)
I will feel tired. It happens to everyone.
Maybe I'm hungry or thirsty?
Taking a walk can be just as refreshing as napping.
I must not go to the store as I will be too tempted to buy alcohol.

Now, I work from home on Wednesdays so that day and weekends are my trouble times. Part of my plan is to do my grocery shopping once a week, Tuesday evening , so I don't need to leave the house at all on Wednesday. Weekends are a bit tougher and there are times I do need to go to the store. Still working on that aspect.
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Old 05-03-2017, 05:39 AM
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Originally Posted by FixItDad View Post
Don't know what Day 1 (Round X) seemed so hard. Maybe it was the usual headache around happy hour telling me to drink. I sat parked in front of the liquor store for 20 minutes before pulling away. Went back to the office to get some work done and my wife surprised me by brining some dinner. At first I said, "Checking up on me?" which didn't go over well. I'm glad I stayed away from my 99c Schnapps. It would of made that surprise visit a disaster.

Slept better but getting some random anxiety this morning. I have a double shot of help later today, first session with a new counselor and a SMART meeting.

Why is the first day so damn hard? I'm a little pissed, I should be almost a month down but screwed up.

jk
The first day is usually hard, FixItDad. We're suffering from a hangover, maybe beginning withdrawl and striving to break a long held belief.

I think it's hard because it makes me realize I really don't want to go through another Day 1.

Don't be angry at yourself, FID, and let it go. You're here and can move forward. I know there is merit in looking in the past and having regrets, but try to use the past to learn lessons from our mistakes and move on.

Glad you made it through!
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Old 05-03-2017, 06:58 AM
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Morning folks - Made it through day 3 and am starting day 4.

Optimist4ever57 - I also had some cravings at the end of day 3. Cravings have a tendency to hit me at the end of the work day. I noticed some pre-craving thoughts in the early afternoon and it was helpful to eat a good snack to tide me over until dinner, even though I wasn't particularly hungry. Remembering HALT is helpful (for people who haven't heard of that before, it means to be careful not to let yourself get to Hungry, Angry, Lonely, or Tired as they all tend to be triggers to use).

I feel tired and kind of down this morning, but know thats normal for day 4, and am still really looking forward to getting to rest this weekend at the end of the first week.

KitKat7575 - You sound similar to me except I had a sober 2014 and have been 'out' since 2015. I think now would be a great time for both of us to get back to those better times.

Simplicity4114 - Congrats on your year I was also in the May 2016 class briefly. Hopefully we can come back next year with 2 and 1 years and welcome the May 2018ers

Welcome to everyone new who's joined - I'm really glad you're all here!

I hope the day goes well for all of you - stay strong and lets get through another on our path to better lives
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Old 05-03-2017, 07:04 AM
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Even though I got a good nights sleep I feel like I'm hitting the wall.

MOAR COFFEE
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Old 05-03-2017, 07:45 AM
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Originally Posted by ZenButterfly View Post
What do you think of Baclofen? I got Naltrexone but read recently that Baclofen might be better for cravings.
Yeah it works great for me, even on a dose of 40mg or so my cravings are gone. Worth a try.

Quick check in at the end of Day 3. Have work, was good, got tomorrow off to hang out with my kids. Woot should be good..

Stay strong everyone.
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Old 05-03-2017, 08:43 AM
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Hi everyone.
If I survive the torment of this day, I will be back on my feet again.
Drank all day yesterday, from about 9 am to 7 pm. Beer, wine, rum. What a joke of a day, a waste of my energy and space. Today I am beyond a mess- angry and irritable, anxious, mean. I am home with my toddler and all I want is for this day to be over so I can wake up sober and hangover free.
I will not drink today. I will not drink ever again. The pain is unbearable- the person I become when poisoned by booze is further away from the true me than I ever thought possible. I don't want this feeling- God take this feeling away from me.
I hate myself today- my puffy face, my impatience with my child- my bloated body and lack of motivation.

I refuse to ever feel this way again.
I was so close to 4 months and feeling so good- why did I blow it?
They say some of us can't handle big changes in the first year of sobriety and I guess they are right. We just moved 5 states away from everything we knew. I had to quit my job and stay home with our toddler. We are living with my parents (only 1 more week to go and then we move into our new home). Too many changes and I apparently wasn't strong enough to handle it. Or I got complacent in my recovery. I thought I was cured. I thought I had a handle on it and forgot that I actually have to check in here and dedicate each day to staying sober.

I guess the "why" doesn't matter. I should have never taken that first drink.

I pray from the bottom of my soul that I never, ever forget this feeling, these thoughts and this misery. I hope those of you who are struggling take the time to post so we can help you through it.
WE CAN DO THIS!
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Old 05-03-2017, 08:54 AM
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Yeah I'd better check in. Two hours til meeting.
Have walked and even run all day really. I guess I don't do anything else sept clean to fill sobriety with yet. Embarrassing.
Texted AA lady to get me by shop this morning.
Good chat with lady who's entered London marathon next year. Made me feel like regular lady. Normal.
Bought a new lipstick which I've worn all day even when I tried running. It was like my body had forgotten how to run and I once did a 6 minute mile which you're probably killing yourselves laughing at but I'm only 5'3. The dog looked at me a bit funny then trotted along beside me.
Theres no chaos. Perhaps I was a bit addicted to it. I went to a proper butchers and got steak to cook properly.
Hi Everyone sending good thoughts to you all
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Old 05-03-2017, 09:01 AM
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I would like to join you all. I have been around here quite a while actually, I was originally "RINGTHEDOORBELL".....but though that was too long so now I'm "CROUTIE."
I keep falling right back into the trap of thinking I can have one glass of wine and stop....
Ah, NO, actually that's not what happens! So, I just need to stop and never start again. So, I think accountability is in order, and I'm starting here.
Best wishes,
Croutie
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Old 05-03-2017, 11:08 AM
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Originally Posted by Croutie View Post
I would like to join you all. I have been around here quite a while actually, I was originally "RINGTHEDOORBELL".....but though that was too long so now I'm "CROUTIE."
I keep falling right back into the trap of thinking I can have one glass of wine and stop....
Ah, NO, actually that's not what happens! So, I just need to stop and never start again. So, I think accountability is in order, and I'm starting here.
Best wishes,
Croutie

I hear ya Croutie. It's the famous line our Av keeps feeding us. For me I am starting to realize that I still haven't accepted the fact that I am indeed an alcoholic. Every time I go back to drinking I am convinced that "this time" I can drink like a normal person. Well I can't. None of us can or we wouldn't be here.

Wishing you luck and sending support your way.
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Old 05-03-2017, 11:26 AM
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Just another check in. 2:25 here in the Northeast, USA. Little man is asleep and I just made some lunch. Grateful for my sobriety, for every single second of it.
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Old 05-03-2017, 01:23 PM
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I want to join this class. It's getting out of control for me. I decided to look for help, I don't want to drink anymore. I'm going to try naltrexone, and support here and at the AA meeting.
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