Meaghan86

So I've been in the program before and had relapsed but now by the grace of God am sober again. I recently broke up with my boyfriend who is addicted to meth, and opiates. I'm 30 and have been in love before but not the way I'm in love with him. I also know I'm very codependent . Ok so I broke up with him bc he spent all his money on the habit, was verbally abusive, and it was always just my fault for everything that went wrong in his life. I moved home to my parents so we are 1hr away from each other. I was devistated and crying everyday not being with him didn't really know why I was that emotional and then I found out I was pregnant. I didn't think I was able to have children. I'm very excited about the pregnancy and so is he but he's telling me I betrayed him by leaving, that he can't trust me again, etc I'm very confused because then the next day he is calling me telling me he loves me and calling me pet names. I don't want to have my emotions go up and down and be stressed out because I'm pregnant, and it hurts that drugs are still coming first in his life. I tell myself I'm not going to answer the phone when he calls me and I always cave. I finally told him tonight if he keeps using he won't be involved in our child's life . Then I stupidly answered a video chat from him and he started heating a spoon and passing out while we were on video chat. He thinks ovbiously that since I've dealt with it this long I will continue to, and I think he really for some reason is pushing me to see how far he can take it. Can anyone please help with support or advice of what to do? How to handle the situation? I'm all alone in this and only want what's best for my baby and myself . Thank you so much and I look forward to any help you can offer

Mags1

Hi Meaghan welcome to SR.

I've no experience to be able to help you but I know the most important people in your life just now are you and your baby.

There is sure to be someone along who understands what you're going through and can share their experiences with you.

Love and hugs to you, take care xx

Soberwolf

Hello

SimplyFree

Meaghan,
Take care of yourself and the baby. I know you love him, but I'm fairly certain you will grow to love your child more. If he really is interested in being a Dad, he'll have to get clean. Otherwise it is obvious he loves his habit most. That will only create stress and an unhealthy family environment. You've already made the break, that is a good thing. My to cents is he can clean for real or you need to plan a healthy home for you and your child.

Nonsensical

I think it is a common misperception that people push limits because they don't want any limits. I think it is just the opposite. People push limits because they want to find out there are some. (Your child, by the way, will be an EXPERT at this.)

Set some limits and stick to them.

Congrats on getting sober. You deserve better than to be dragged back under.

Best of Luck on Your Journey.

Nowsthetime

Welcome!

We are here to support you. You have to look after yourself and the baby first. He will not change until he wants to. Not for you or the baby. There's a Friends and Family section here that you might find useful.

Sorry about what brings you here.

Mizzuno

The baby is top priority. He/ she needs to have a stable environment with love and support.