Looking for the light
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2017
Posts: 3
Looking for the light
Hi! I'm new to posting, but I've been reading some threads for a while now. I have not had a drink in over a month now, and I'm feeling awful. I guess I was highly functioning with the booze. I had energy, was fairly happy, exercized almost every day and life was pretty good.
I stopped drinking because I couldn't stop gaining weight and I was losing my memory. Every morning I would wake up having a difficult time remembering what I said or did, but I was usually in the safety and comfort of my own home with my husband.
I had my fair share of hangovers as a nightly drinker. I wanted my life to be better without booze, but I have been really struggling. I'm irritable, I have no energy, and all I want to do is stay in bed. Sounds like depression, but this is new to me. I've had a relationship with booze for most of my life, and I am truly feeling the loss and void in my life. I know I am doing the right thing, but it is so hard. I thought a month would be a good milestone where I'd start to feel better. Right now I go through each day just excited to go back to bed. I'm definitely looking for the light at the end of this tunnel.
I stopped drinking because I couldn't stop gaining weight and I was losing my memory. Every morning I would wake up having a difficult time remembering what I said or did, but I was usually in the safety and comfort of my own home with my husband.
I had my fair share of hangovers as a nightly drinker. I wanted my life to be better without booze, but I have been really struggling. I'm irritable, I have no energy, and all I want to do is stay in bed. Sounds like depression, but this is new to me. I've had a relationship with booze for most of my life, and I am truly feeling the loss and void in my life. I know I am doing the right thing, but it is so hard. I thought a month would be a good milestone where I'd start to feel better. Right now I go through each day just excited to go back to bed. I'm definitely looking for the light at the end of this tunnel.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 25,373
Well done on your sober time and welcome, MarthaR10. 
Early sobriety is pretty rocky, no doubt about it. Are you eating healthy food and getting some exercise every day? Those two things are vital to me feeling good.
I slept a lot in early days, too. Lots of healing is happening right now and that's a very good thing. Hang on! It keeps getting better, but it does take time.
Early sobriety is pretty rocky, no doubt about it. Are you eating healthy food and getting some exercise every day? Those two things are vital to me feeling good.
I slept a lot in early days, too. Lots of healing is happening right now and that's a very good thing. Hang on! It keeps getting better, but it does take time.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2017
Posts: 1,476
I felt pretty much the same way at 30 days in. I kept waiting for the fog to lift. I'm still in the early stages myself (almost 2 months now), but with each day that passes, I'm feeling better.
Are you taking any vitamins? What about counseling..have you considered that option?
Hang in there and post as often as possible... And congrats on 30 days!
Are you taking any vitamins? What about counseling..have you considered that option?
Hang in there and post as often as possible... And congrats on 30 days!
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,505
Getting through a month is great!
It could be depression and you could have been self-medicating depression for years. That's pretty common for alcoholics. As the next month or so goes by, you may see the depression lift, if it was caused by alcohol. Alcohol is a depressant. However, if the depression existed before you began drinking (as it did for me), you may need to talk to your dr about it. Also, it's a good idea to have a checkup and talk to your dr if you're not feeling well.
It could be depression and you could have been self-medicating depression for years. That's pretty common for alcoholics. As the next month or so goes by, you may see the depression lift, if it was caused by alcohol. Alcohol is a depressant. However, if the depression existed before you began drinking (as it did for me), you may need to talk to your dr about it. Also, it's a good idea to have a checkup and talk to your dr if you're not feeling well.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2017
Posts: 3
Doc & therapist on hand
Thanks for all the replies. It was a doctor's visit that prompted my ditching of the drink. I had blood work done to try and help solve the mystery of my weight gain. Well, no mystery there when you're drinking every night... But I thought with how much I exercise and how I eat I should not be gaining... Something else must have been wrong. But, it does appear that alcohol had a lot to do with it. I'm down ten pounds already.
The same doctor gave me a bunch of vitamins, so I think I'm set. I have a therapist who is helping me through my childhood issues that probably caused my drinking. I guess I was just wanting the waters to part and some sort of sign... CON-grad-U-lations on doing something I never thought I could do... But I miss it too much to celebrate (yet).
The same doctor gave me a bunch of vitamins, so I think I'm set. I have a therapist who is helping me through my childhood issues that probably caused my drinking. I guess I was just wanting the waters to part and some sort of sign... CON-grad-U-lations on doing something I never thought I could do... But I miss it too much to celebrate (yet).
Member
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: Planet Earth (most days)
Posts: 1,596
Originally Posted by MarthaR10 
Thanks for all the replies. It was a doctor's visit that prompted my ditching of the drink. I had blood work done to try and help solve the mystery of my weight gain. Well, no mystery there when you're drinking every night... But I thought with how much I exercise and how I eat I should not be gaining... Something else must have been wrong. But, it does appear that alcohol had a lot to do with it. I'm down ten pounds already.
The same doctor gave me a bunch of vitamins, so I think I'm set. I have a therapist who is helping me through my childhood issues that probably caused my drinking. I guess I was just wanting the waters to part and some sort of sign... CON-grad-U-lations on doing something I never thought I could do... But I miss it too much to celebrate (yet).
The same doctor gave me a bunch of vitamins, so I think I'm set. I have a therapist who is helping me through my childhood issues that probably caused my drinking. I guess I was just wanting the waters to part and some sort of sign... CON-grad-U-lations on doing something I never thought I could do... But I miss it too much to celebrate (yet).
Blue Belt
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Soberville, USA
Posts: 4,174
In my experience....it takes a long long time....for the brain to normalize.
Dopamine eventually normalizes.
Thrilling activities, roller coasters, scary/funny movies, helping people, exercise etc are all ways to feel some natural happiness.
I don't take rx meds...my job would be in jeapordy if i was diagnosed as an alky.
Thanks.
Dopamine eventually normalizes.
Thrilling activities, roller coasters, scary/funny movies, helping people, exercise etc are all ways to feel some natural happiness.
I don't take rx meds...my job would be in jeapordy if i was diagnosed as an alky.
Thanks.
under new management
Join Date: Jun 2015
Location: Calgary, Alberta
Posts: 2,339
one month is fantastic!!!
when I stopped drinking it took some time before I was feeling good. I drank for so many years, I figure my brain and my body needed sufficient healing time so I tried not to rush it, I really wanted this to stick!
Don't give up, it will get better. It may take time but it is so worth it
when I stopped drinking it took some time before I was feeling good. I drank for so many years, I figure my brain and my body needed sufficient healing time so I tried not to rush it, I really wanted this to stick!
Don't give up, it will get better. It may take time but it is so worth it
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Location: canada
Posts: 7,242
Martha,
welcome, and good going on a tough month.
when you "give up the problem" and it turns out that life isn't better without "the problem" at all, then it might be beneficial to explore if what you thought was the problem was actually more in the way of a "solution".
you might need or want to make a whole lot of other changes.
welcome, and good going on a tough month.
when you "give up the problem" and it turns out that life isn't better without "the problem" at all, then it might be beneficial to explore if what you thought was the problem was actually more in the way of a "solution".
you might need or want to make a whole lot of other changes.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: East Coast USA
Posts: 120,874
Welcome to SR, MarthaR; very glad that you found us and have joined the posting side.
It took a while before I began to feel better; lethargy and 'foggy brain' plagued me for quite some time.
The good news is that (other than some chronic health issues unrelated to alcohol), I am feeling well and happy.
Congratulations on your month of sobriety, Martha. Well done.
It took a while before I began to feel better; lethargy and 'foggy brain' plagued me for quite some time.
The good news is that (other than some chronic health issues unrelated to alcohol), I am feeling well and happy.
Congratulations on your month of sobriety, Martha. Well done.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 65
congrats on 1 month!!! You do have something to be happy about
I am close, almost 4 weeks and I am the same way...I get very moody, I cry for no reason, I am so tired....but I am forcing myself to exercise daily which seems to help. One thing I am loving right now, is my sleep is undisturbed, I am not waking in a panic, with my racing heart. And if I do wake, I am able to fall right back to sleep.
I am close, almost 4 weeks and I am the same way...I get very moody, I cry for no reason, I am so tired....but I am forcing myself to exercise daily which seems to help. One thing I am loving right now, is my sleep is undisturbed, I am not waking in a panic, with my racing heart. And if I do wake, I am able to fall right back to sleep.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2017
Posts: 3
Originally Posted by SoberLeigh
How are you, MarthaR?
Thinking of you.
Thinking of you.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: Planet Earth (most days)
Posts: 1,596
Originally Posted by MarthaR10
Things are better, Leigh. Thanks for checking in on me. Today is much better than yesterday. Thankfully I have a lot of things to do. Keeping busy has been crucial for me. I'm so grateful for a lot of things. But mostly happy that I don't have to worry about how I'm going to drive home from a show this weekend! I'm so glad I don't have to be strategic about my drinking in order to make it through the night. It's so liberating.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: East Coast USA
Posts: 120,874
Originally Posted by MarthaR10
Things are better, Leigh. Thanks for checking in on me. Today is much better than yesterday. Thankfully I have a lot of things to do. Keeping busy has been crucial for me. I'm so grateful for a lot of things. But mostly happy that I don't have to worry about how I'm going to drive home from a show this weekend! I'm so glad I don't have to be strategic about my drinking in order to make it through the night. It's so liberating.
I've never known such freedom. Congratulations; so happy to hear that things are better.
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