KM0816

How many of us have made a ton of changes to improve our lives, except this main one, quitting alcohol? I know i made some big changes and started doing things I've always wanted, thinking maybe then i would be happy. Yet alcohol addiction has followed me thru all of it. Sometimes i feel like a fraud. Like others see me one way but would be disgusted at the addict side of me. No one knows how bad it is other than me.
I wish i knew why i did this to myself and why i can be so strong in other ways yet let alcohol beat me.
I know it's because i am not normal and can't drink like "normal" and i just have to accept it. I am not a bad person, alcohol is bad and makes me into someone else with no self control.

PippoRossi

Don't feel bad - I felt the exact same way. Thankfully, we no longer have to be our old selves.

Nonsensical

I dunno. I made a few changes, but I was never willing to make any changes that might interfere with my drinking.

Tons of changes came after I decided it was time to live a sober life.

You're not a fraud, you're a slave. Quit drinking for 100 days and see if you don't know what I mean.

You can do this.

Horn95

Feel the same way. I have achieved alot in my life. On the outside looking in, I imagine it seems like I have a great life. But I feel like a fraud, and that it cold all collapse in any moment. And the alcohol has at times, just made the day bearable. I hate alcohol, but right now, it is very hard getting through the day.

I feel you. But we can do this.

doggonecarl

So just one more change to make, huh? Total sobriety!

badger257

I second the motion from carl...one more to go. Decide, commit, and execute.

FarToGo

If you stick to the drinking, it will eventually undermine all your positive changes. It will get you so that you can't be bothered trying anymore. Then it will start impacting on the things you've managed to hold onto, family, job, outward respectability ....
Sober is the way .
I wish you strength.
Xx