Where I am at today
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2017
Posts: 2
Where I am at today
Thought I would post on where I am at today. I am currently in a sober home in FL while my wife and son are back in FL. I am working a solid program I feel and repairing my marriage with my wife. Things were going good but then today she told me she needed space due to reminders of how bad I was to her. I am giving her all the space she needs and thought I would let everyone know where I am at today.
I already went to one meeting this morning and will do another one this evening. For once, I am finding it easier to deal with the stresses of my marriage, life etc. I use to act out on emotions but now I can take a step back and think before acting out. Some days are easier than others but 65 days today and I am loving it.
I already went to one meeting this morning and will do another one this evening. For once, I am finding it easier to deal with the stresses of my marriage, life etc. I use to act out on emotions but now I can take a step back and think before acting out. Some days are easier than others but 65 days today and I am loving it.
Blue Belt
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Soberville, USA
Posts: 4,174
Miz,
The main thing is staying clean.
The rest of our lifes can build on that foundation.
I'm frustrated w my wife too. She is hyper active and wants to boss me around.
Additionally, she believes she is going to die before she can appreciate her life.
Because of that she wants to take extravagant trips and spend thousands.
This is a new facet from her. If she pulled this when we were dating, 17 years ago, i never would have married her.
We all have problems.
Get well.
Thanks.
The main thing is staying clean.
The rest of our lifes can build on that foundation.
I'm frustrated w my wife too. She is hyper active and wants to boss me around.
Additionally, she believes she is going to die before she can appreciate her life.
Because of that she wants to take extravagant trips and spend thousands.
This is a new facet from her. If she pulled this when we were dating, 17 years ago, i never would have married her.
We all have problems.
Get well.
Thanks.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Athens, Georgia
Posts: 962
Congrats on 65 days Mizzou!
You said you were going to meetings ... I assume AA meetings?
AA saved my life, but it only happened thru working the steps and working the program. My suggestion - Read the Book Alcoholics Anonymous thru several times, underlining everything that seems relevant, each time. Do the same with the Book 12 Steps and 12 Traditions. Look up and say the 3rd Step, 7th Step, and 11th Step Prayers each day. DO THE WORK outlined in the AA Book. It is NOT just an 'inspirational book' it is an Instruction Manual, and it WORKS. I can't bake a cake just by reading the recipe, but it will happen if I follow the recipe and DO THE WORK as instructed.
RDBplus3 ... Happy, Joyous and FREE
You said you were going to meetings ... I assume AA meetings?
AA saved my life, but it only happened thru working the steps and working the program. My suggestion - Read the Book Alcoholics Anonymous thru several times, underlining everything that seems relevant, each time. Do the same with the Book 12 Steps and 12 Traditions. Look up and say the 3rd Step, 7th Step, and 11th Step Prayers each day. DO THE WORK outlined in the AA Book. It is NOT just an 'inspirational book' it is an Instruction Manual, and it WORKS. I can't bake a cake just by reading the recipe, but it will happen if I follow the recipe and DO THE WORK as instructed.
RDBplus3 ... Happy, Joyous and FREE
Member
Join Date: Dec 2016
Location: Northwest U.S.
Posts: 778
Great job Mizzou! 65 days is fantastic.
I recommend that you give your wife the space she needs, allow her to pursue her own treatment, and for you to focus on yourself.
One of the most difficult parts of my sobriety journey was accepting the damage that my drinking caused and accepting that it was my SO's sole choice whether to stay with me or leave. We don't control others' feeling or actions, but we do control ours. Once I fully accepted that she would do what was right for her and that was completely within her rights, I was better able to focus my sobriety on myself. I came to realize that, even though I loved her very much and it would crush me if she ended things, I would remain sober even if that happened because my sobriety was for me and was not dependent on the actions of anyone else. This gave me great strength and continues to serve as a bedrock of my sobriety. Fortunately, my relationship survived this and has grown stronger as the months have passed.
Great job with your recovery so far! Keep on working at it.
I recommend that you give your wife the space she needs, allow her to pursue her own treatment, and for you to focus on yourself.
One of the most difficult parts of my sobriety journey was accepting the damage that my drinking caused and accepting that it was my SO's sole choice whether to stay with me or leave. We don't control others' feeling or actions, but we do control ours. Once I fully accepted that she would do what was right for her and that was completely within her rights, I was better able to focus my sobriety on myself. I came to realize that, even though I loved her very much and it would crush me if she ended things, I would remain sober even if that happened because my sobriety was for me and was not dependent on the actions of anyone else. This gave me great strength and continues to serve as a bedrock of my sobriety. Fortunately, my relationship survived this and has grown stronger as the months have passed.
Great job with your recovery so far! Keep on working at it.
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