bronzie

But walking around and playing outside with my daughter for about 3 hours this afternoon was better than nothing. We really enjoyed just walking around all over the property and some around the neighborhood, picking up some trash that the wind blew around. We had a storm yesterday with very strong winds and rain. I like keeping the Earth clean and looking nice, especially where we live.

Even if it isn't the best living/family situation, I want to make the best of each day. I just feel bad when I don't eat right and get enough exercise, but my ankle is hurting me a lot. Another trigger for me would be physical pain, usually my back hurting, but for the past month or so, it had been my ankle. So at least I was able to do some walking and get outdoors, and I can probably do the exercise bike, now that I think about it. Just don't like it much. Would rather do treadmill or jogging outside.

Anyway, sorry for all my posts lately, I am probably getting on everyone's nerves by now. I'm all over the place, rambling on, and although I am feeling okay now, it's weird to not be drinking. Like seriously, instead of sitting in the rocking chair on the porch, drinking wine and smoking cigarettes while watching the kids play, I spent that time walking around and having fun with my kid! That feels like a win right there and I want to feel like that every weekend!

Maudcat

I have a troublesome foot at times. I ride the bike at the gym. It's something, anyway, as you say.
Nice to get outside with your daughter. Lots of fresh air, gentle yoga, and plenty of water helped get through those early days.
You will be okay.

badger257

Hi bronzie... Hope the ankle starts feeling better soon. And there is no need to apologize for the posting. That is what we are all here for. Make 10 threads a day if that will keep you sober. We are all in this together! Kudos on staying sober.

bronzie

Thank you both! Saturday night now and I'm too exhausted to think about drinking. Maybe I need to be more physically active, then I won't need to drink to get to sleep. If only I had more energy! Now I just have to get thru the entire day Sunday (last Sunday it was ridiculous how much I drank). I didn't do anything stupid, my friend was driving, and she took me home and I just slept it off.....but I sure felt miserable the next day, and even missed work last Monday because the anxiety was so bad. That won't happen this week. I will not drink tonight or tomorrow! Sober Sunday, lets go!

D122y

Post away bron!

I always read the short ones w few replies.

I can't get through the longer posts usually. I start to internally grade the flow and content.

I have a home entertainment rotation. Tv, games, food, drink, fb, sr, etc etc.

So I come here several times a day. Especially on weekends.

Getting sleepy now, even though I took a 2 hour nap.

I'm on vacation, my body seems to know it and is getting caught up on rest.

Had a great Chinese message today. Head to,toe. Highly recommend these.

Thanks.

PhoenixJ

c011:

Berrybean

Keep reading and keep posting. It's what gets us through.

It says in the Saint Francis prayer that it is in giving that we recieve, and this is something that I have found to be so, so true since getting sober. You got out there and did some litter picking and gave some time to your daughter, and it helped you more than anyone else. So, on your list of things that help when the going gets tough, you could add 'help someone'.

It takes a little while for sleep to become normalised. It's frustrating and exhausting, but if we get stressed about it that can be counterproductive. I'd suggest that yiu make a deal with yiurself that while you're laying awake in bed you will not spend that time going ovr resentments, fears or shames. It's true what they say about the darkest hour being before dawn. I don't know anyone who's ever had a useful thought come from laying in the dark drenched in shame, fear or anger. Sure, those thoughts will pop into your head, but if you've made the deal with yourself that you only think about those things in the day, you're far more likely to allow yourself to gently push those thoughts back out with some others. My favourite meditations (sounds a bit grand, I just mean purposefuly focussing my mind on something , and if negative thoughts popped up, being willing to refocus on my positive thoughts) used to be a mental overhaul of the garden, in minute detail. What I'd plant where, where the path would be, etc. And if my mind wandered I'd go back to the back door and start my overhaul again. Other times it might be a walk through my childhood town or similar. Not so exciting, but better than counting sheep I guess. Lol.

BB

bronzie

Thank you Berry, I am just lying awake now, and the meditation thing is such a great suggestion. Let the negative thoughts and emotions go away as soon as they pop into my head.

And yes, I agree with the idea that helping others helps yourself most. I really do feel good when I make someone else happy, or do something to help others.

It's amazing how much time I feel like I have this weekend without drinking. I would usually just feel so overwhelmed with things to do,that I would drink thru the weekend without accomplishing much at all. Maybe I can actually be productive now and get into the habit of being sober and living life instead of letting it pass by.

Dee74

sounds like you're doing well Bronzie
Hope yr ankle is better soon

D

tomsteve

good on ya bronzie!
days spent with youngens are awesome. not only priceless for me, but priceless for them,too.
plus, I have a legitimate reason to act like a kid and play in the sandbox.
neighbors look at me funny when its just me in there and no youngen.

bronzie

Haha! I bet so, lol.
And yes, That's very true, it's so important for kids to have their parents spend time with them! I am always with my daughter, but I just want to make sure I am being "present" and making sure she knows she is loved and adored! I just love the youngens!