Ugh! Facing another Saturday night without my crutch
 

Going out tonight to listen to my brother in law's band. Everyone will be tossing a few back except for me. I need to ride this craving wave I'm having now. I can't drink anymore. I have pain in my liver area and finally made a dr appointment. I can't believe that even with this pain I would even consider having a drink. I have kids to raise. I need to be here for them. I won't drink tonight but I'm depressed about it. Ugh! Trying to make it through this weekend! Weekdays are easier for me to get through.

It gets easier as time goes by. Make sure you have an escape plan if tonight gets too difficult, or you can always skip being around drinking until you have a little more sober time under your belt.

Why not take a pass on tonight's activity? There's no reason to put yourself in an uncomfortable situation when you are this ambivalent. The band will play other gigs. Curl up with your sweat pants, a blanket and some popcorn and Netflix instead.

I wouldn't put myself in that position if I wasn't rock-solid. It's not worth it.

Yeah I think I would skip it. I know we need to learn to live with it...but not if you put yourself at risk of caving.

I went out a million times and saw a million bands. It's not that great. People who pursue that whole heart of Saturday night thing are ultimately looking for something that isn't there.
Stay home for a change. It's nice.

Then perhaps staying home, or finding an activity more supportive of your sobriety than going to a bar, would be a better choice.

I know what you mean about having pain in your liver area and still wanting to drink. I have been ignoring the pain in my liver area for awhile. Addiction really changes my priorities.

Don't give up fighting!!

I used to be depressed that I couldn't drink, now I'm having too much fun sober to even consider drinking. :)

I'd skip the band. Wait til you're sober longer before putting yourself in harm's way.

It sounds like you need a pillow, blanket and a good movie. A series. The liver hurting thing doesnt sound pleasant and going to a bar when getting sober is a set up for disaster. Just sayin'

My kidneys used to hurt. It caused me concern, but I kept drinking. It was a bad idea and I wish I'd stopped sooner. But don't be fatalistic; the human body can take an incredible amount of abuse. I'm confident that if you stop, the liver pain will go away and there won't be any damage done.

sounds like it would be pretty depressing siitin around all that temptation.
i didnt get sober to be depressed and tempted.

craving alcohol and going somewhere alcohol is served and being with a group of people that are drinkin while workin at getting sober while having pain in the liver area,saying"Facing another Saturday night without my crutch" and going where its in easy reach.
from this side i say that can be a definition of insanity.

Thank you all for your honesty and advice. We were given tickets to see the band as gifts and I feel obligated but a night home sounds wonderful! I may have to come clean and confess to my brother in law the obstacles I face.

:You_Rock_

very glad you made that decision.

When I decided to finally stop drinking, I first told all family and friend do Not invite me to anything pertaining to alcohol for awhile. If they truly care for me they will have to understand. Sobriety comes first. Hopefully they will understand if you decline which I'm sure they Will!! Enjoy a nice evening in.

I don't think you need to do any True Confessions right now unless you feel good about that.

I didn't "come out" to friends, only my very closest family, and I didn't tell them right away - it had been many months of not drinking before I mentioned it to them. Of course it gets better in time and I'm easily able to go out now and be around alcohol. A simple, "I'm not drinking tonight," works once some time has passed.

I prefer a night in after all the shenanigans I used to be up to on a Saturday.

Just text him, I will not be able to see your band tonight. My apologies. Have a good show.

And just leave it at that. No explanations necessary.

A hard pass sounds just right to me myluckyday :)

D

Hope you had a nice evening , and wish you a whole bunch of enjoyable Saturday nights in the future.
Alcohol being a crutch is AV talk. I think I understand the intent of the title, but after putting the bottle and deciding to walk away takes on some aspects of mindgaming. Good news is the deck is staked in our favor, recognizing and dismissing the AV ( any thought of future alcohol use , or doubt of our ability to remain abstinent) gets easier with practice and sheer irrationality of those thoughts.
Alocohol consumption a crutch( a temporary device used to help regain health?!) more like a dagger poking your liver, crutches like that are easy to avoid , no? :)

Ok so I caved in and went. I couldn't say no after money was spent on the tickets. Anyway, I ended up having a great time! I had two sodas and it didn't even bother me that others were drinking! I had terrible anxiety and cravings beforehand though. I was really surprised at myself and it felt so good coming home sober. I think I will stay away from these situations in the near future. Don't want to press my luck. Thank you all for your guidance! I don't know if I could do this without you all!

Good post. I like the part that the deck is stacked in our favor. I never thought about it like that, but it's true. 100 percent of us can be sober if we choose it. Moreover, as dwtbd says, this does get easier with time.