sick and tired
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2017
Posts: 4
sick and tired
Yep- I'm sick and tired of being sick and tired !!!! I'm so frigging angry with myself, I've been to rehab and I'm in a worse state than I was before I went in.. I feel having that bit of recovery knowledge has messed my head up even more.................. 
.... dont know which way to turn 
.... dont know which way to turn 
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2017
Posts: 4
Originally Posted by january161992 
hi toandfro
the main reason i drank was self hate
aa gives us tools like helping others which enables me to think about myself less
less likely to want to change the way i feel
the main reason i drank was self hate
aa gives us tools like helping others which enables me to think about myself less
less likely to want to change the way i feel
Forum Leader
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 16,945
My guess is that you keep doing this to yourself because you are an alcoholic, just like the rest of us. And it doesn't make sense, you are right...most of us found the same thing.
Rehab and AA are only part of the equation - you have to fully accept your addiction first. There is no way to explain "why" we are the way we are, we just have to accept that we ARE the way we are.
Keep doing those things that you mentioned..( AA, counseling, etc ) because they will help for certain. You will find a lot of support here too, stick around and read/post..ask any questions you like.
Rehab and AA are only part of the equation - you have to fully accept your addiction first. There is no way to explain "why" we are the way we are, we just have to accept that we ARE the way we are.
Keep doing those things that you mentioned..( AA, counseling, etc ) because they will help for certain. You will find a lot of support here too, stick around and read/post..ask any questions you like.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2017
Posts: 4
Thanks for your reply
I know I haven't accepted it yet !!! I stopped going to AA and counselling telling myself I wasn't going to live my life around recovery !!!!!!!!!!!! how wrong was I .. I would like to stick around but I'm struggling just getting to grips with this site at the moment ?
I know I haven't accepted it yet !!! I stopped going to AA and counselling telling myself I wasn't going to live my life around recovery !!!!!!!!!!!! how wrong was I .. I would like to stick around but I'm struggling just getting to grips with this site at the moment ?
Member
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Baton Rouge, La.
Posts: 15,229
We go to school beginning at a young age
and many do continue on with their studies
into college and so on. Always learning to
better themselves in life, careers etc.
Same thing with addiction. We know its
an illness/disease that affects many people
every single day and has become an epidemic.
We have to go to rehab, counciling, recovery
school to learn how to live life addiction free,
to live without killing ourselves with this toxic
substance that grabs ahold of us and wont let
go.
I often heard that once we get sober then
it will screw up our drinking careers for good
because it will never be the same as it once
was.
Going to rehab, they teach us about our
addiction and its affects on our minds, bodies
and yes, souls. Then they give us a program
of recovery as a guideline to learn how to
incorporate in all areas of our life once we
return home.
Many of us have gone thru the rehab process
like I have for 28 day with a 6 week outpatient
aftercare program attached to complete my
program 26 yrs ago.
Once I left rehab, I had to return to my everyday
life as a mom and wife. The positive thing was I
was sober. Sober for the first time in a long time
which was awesome.
All the alcohol was out of my house so while
I was continueing on my recovery journey
fresh out of rehab, if anything would get to
me, I wouldn't be able to pick up a drink to
solve my everyday problems and set me back
on the merry go round of insanity and misery.
Those tools and knowledge of recovery
handed to me would be what id have to
reach for instead of poison. They would
be what would teach me how to remain
sober for a many one days sober down
the road and it did and has.
Never did I ever think that reaching for
poison would make my life any better. I
had enough experiences with alcohol
in the past that did me no good. So drinking
wasn't an option. Instead I latched on to
others in recovery for support to call or
reach out to if I needed help emmediately.
And yes they were there for me every
step of the way and are still here for me
today, here in SR. Sure the names and
faces change over time, but the ESH -
experiences, strengths and hopes shared
by many is still the same.
Take what you've learn so far, expand on
it today, grow, mature, stay connected to
your support group and incorporate all
of it in all areas of your life to achieve what
so many of us have with health, happiness,
honesty, faith, and most of all a strong solid
recovery foundation to live your life upon
for many one days sober down the road.
and many do continue on with their studies
into college and so on. Always learning to
better themselves in life, careers etc.
Same thing with addiction. We know its
an illness/disease that affects many people
every single day and has become an epidemic.
We have to go to rehab, counciling, recovery
school to learn how to live life addiction free,
to live without killing ourselves with this toxic
substance that grabs ahold of us and wont let
go.
I often heard that once we get sober then
it will screw up our drinking careers for good
because it will never be the same as it once
was.
Going to rehab, they teach us about our
addiction and its affects on our minds, bodies
and yes, souls. Then they give us a program
of recovery as a guideline to learn how to
incorporate in all areas of our life once we
return home.
Many of us have gone thru the rehab process
like I have for 28 day with a 6 week outpatient
aftercare program attached to complete my
program 26 yrs ago.
Once I left rehab, I had to return to my everyday
life as a mom and wife. The positive thing was I
was sober. Sober for the first time in a long time
which was awesome.
All the alcohol was out of my house so while
I was continueing on my recovery journey
fresh out of rehab, if anything would get to
me, I wouldn't be able to pick up a drink to
solve my everyday problems and set me back
on the merry go round of insanity and misery.
Those tools and knowledge of recovery
handed to me would be what id have to
reach for instead of poison. They would
be what would teach me how to remain
sober for a many one days sober down
the road and it did and has.
Never did I ever think that reaching for
poison would make my life any better. I
had enough experiences with alcohol
in the past that did me no good. So drinking
wasn't an option. Instead I latched on to
others in recovery for support to call or
reach out to if I needed help emmediately.
And yes they were there for me every
step of the way and are still here for me
today, here in SR. Sure the names and
faces change over time, but the ESH -
experiences, strengths and hopes shared
by many is still the same.
Take what you've learn so far, expand on
it today, grow, mature, stay connected to
your support group and incorporate all
of it in all areas of your life to achieve what
so many of us have with health, happiness,
honesty, faith, and most of all a strong solid
recovery foundation to live your life upon
for many one days sober down the road.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Lakeside, Ca
Posts: 10,208
Originally Posted by toandfro
Yep- I'm sick and tired of being sick and tired !!!! I'm so frigging angry with myself, I've been to rehab and I'm in a worse state than I was before I went in.. I feel having that bit of recovery knowledge has messed my head up even more.................. .... dont know which way to turn
.... dont know which way to turn Also been there and done that.
Being sick and tired of being sick and tired may be a Gift?
That only a few fully receive and put to good use.
M-Bob
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,313
Hi and welcome ToandFro
Yeah no matter what method you choose the fundamentals are the same - you need to want to stop drinking - and you need to be prepared to back that up with action.
Your addiction will suggest that its a bad thing but maybe for a while it's not so bad to "live your life around recovery?"
Support helps too of course - and you'll find a ton of that here
D
Yeah no matter what method you choose the fundamentals are the same - you need to want to stop drinking - and you need to be prepared to back that up with action.
Your addiction will suggest that its a bad thing but maybe for a while it's not so bad to "live your life around recovery?"
Support helps too of course - and you'll find a ton of that here
D
Member
Join Date: Jun 2016
Location: Adelaide, Australia
Posts: 28,626
Dee's word nails it- you 'need'. The compulsion for me to drink was so great- I had to see the alternative - raw and hellish before I stopped drinking. Before that iconic 'rock bottom' I deluded myself with 'yes but...' or 'I will tomorrow'. I always thought regardless of my drinking life would go on. I discovered this in the most extreme of consequences- is not the case.
The question is- why is the need to continue to drink more important than what other things life offers?
Even then- I NEEDED to plan my sobriety, with informed decisions and action. Otherwise instead of being a drunk crap human being, I would be a very miserable, sober crap human being who because of that misery would feel entitled to drink again.
Support to you. PJ
The question is- why is the need to continue to drink more important than what other things life offers?
Even then- I NEEDED to plan my sobriety, with informed decisions and action. Otherwise instead of being a drunk crap human being, I would be a very miserable, sober crap human being who because of that misery would feel entitled to drink again.
Support to you. PJ
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