Kelly12390

I feel this could be the first step in getting some help again. I'm hate to always look for help here but I'm relapsing and I'm ruining my life. I was sober for almost two years and I've started drinking again in late November. It's so bad. I've brought drink even into work and I'm just hurting people so much and myself. What can I do to stop and finally get my life back? Is there anything other than aa, I don't have it in me to put years into this, I really don't. I know i will end up dying and quickly to this if I don't do something. I'm desperate. Thanks

MicroMacro

That's a good question - what do you need to do to stop - and stay stopped?

Self Help Addiction Recovery | SMART Recovery®
Refuge Recovery | A BUDDHIST PATH TO ADDICTION RECOVERY



There's more if you'll spend some time with google.

Do you need to go to detox?
Is it worthwhile considering replacing alcohol/drinking with something you love to do or would love to do?

"I don't have it in me to put years into this ... " Sure you do, but you don't need to look at years - you just need to look at today.

What options do you see?

doggonecarl

Into your recovery?

We kind of have to put years into it...if we want to stay sober. Perhaps not to the same level as we did in the beginning, but some focus on recovery is a life-long process. Does that trouble you?

Kelly12390

Thanks. I really think I can't keep drinking because I'll end up ending one night, it's horrible.

I am going home to my own doctor who knows my history for a referral to speak to a physiatrist that's know for his work in addiction studies.

I just can't open up in AA, I've tried. I just want to have sobriety back. It seems a world away right now. I'm gonna read the link about Buddhist path to recovery now, thanks.

Kelly12390

It's drinking I mean, and right now recovery seems so hard with where I am. Thanks, I know I need to do something to stop.

teatreeoil007

I know you don't feel like you 'have it in you' to puts years into 'this' (recovery)...but hon, you really don't have years to put into active addiction either...like you've said, you're very worried about ruining your life if you keep on in active addiction. So, now is the time to find it in you to start putting into recovery. It really WILL make your life better. I was going to suggest SMART recovery if you don't like AA. Also, come here more often; read and partake. It really can also make a difference!

thomas11

It sounds like you have some choices or decisions to make. Decisions that no one can make for you. You've had sober time so you know what it takes and what rewards it brings. This is just me, but if I absolutely could not quit on my own I would go to inpatient treatment and find a way (later) to pay for it. It might save your life. I wish you the best.

Berrybean

You do know that it's not necessary to open up in meetings, right? As long as you can open up in private to that one person who you choose to be your sponsor that's fine. I know many, many people in AA who don't share in the rooms.

Just saying.

Is inpatient / rehab a possibility if it's got that bad? Perhaps you could discuss that with your doctor?

Wishing you all the best for your recovery whatever route you decide to take.

january161992

agree

im one of 'em

a bunch of talking doesnt keep me sober

a bunch of action being of service to others does

Kelly12390

Thank you all. Appreciate it. I am sober now but can't stop shaking and feel on the edge of a panic attack. Is going cold turkey like this safe? I've drank for a week straight, about 20 bottles of wine and am scared now. I will do something tomorrow about this, lunch time AA meeting and just sit there I think. I need help and it's all I can think of for tomorrow. Impatient now for me would mean I'd lose my apartment and everything I just know know. Thanks everyone x

MsCooterBrown

I feel like I am always on the edge of a panic attack. And I don't care what anyone says...if you look into our background...you will find this common trait. Hang in there...we will find peace. It is a matter of time.

MsCooterBrown

I used to have my picture as a member...I don't like this crawly guy....

teatreeoil007

I wouldn't hesitate to get to a Dr. or ER is you feel unsafe detoxing cold turkey. Acute alcohol withdrawal can be very serious.