Takes a lot for me to write this
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2017
Posts: 36
Takes a lot for me to write this
Short and to the point im now 35 and got my 2nd DUI 2 and half years ago. The court here in Michigan gave me a straight to jail ticket for six months. Worst experience of my life. None of my family members were much drinkers and never been to jail. I felt and still feel like I'm the ugly duckling. Everyone in my family was very supportive but I would still get drunk. But they knew I went back to my old ways and say something mean or a text which I would have never done if sober. Everyone shyed away from me except my father and I don't blame them. I would go a while without drinking then just one drink would make me go on a one week bender. I feel so ashamed. Background..All state for sports and academics..student council. .. Community volunteer..Etc. I drank but not even close to what I do now and never was depressed. Got my degree and a great job. Then a great gf. Then at age 25 my best friend died and gf broke up. Then I started to drink..I mean drink alot. Lost job etc. Still haven't got my license back so now now riding my bike to work in 12" of snow. I've tried AA in the very small community and didn't care for it. Now being sober I can't even barely sleep at night because of all the damage I have done already. I was Catholic and believed in God. Now I'm even wondering what's the purpose in life. I'm not suicidal at all but just feel blah. I have many neices and nephews and I feel left out because I don't have kids. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. There's much more to this story but my fingers are getting sore. Have a great day
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,504
Hi and Welcome,
I moved your thread to this Forum where you will get more responses.
I'm not sure how long you've been sober. I'm sorry that it seems hard to find a purpose in life. If you have been sober for awhile, it might be an idea to talk to your doctor about the possibility of depression. Also, you might consider some kind of counselling or therapy to help you. Have faith that you will find some peace in your life. And, we are here to support you.
I moved your thread to this Forum where you will get more responses.
I'm not sure how long you've been sober. I'm sorry that it seems hard to find a purpose in life. If you have been sober for awhile, it might be an idea to talk to your doctor about the possibility of depression. Also, you might consider some kind of counselling or therapy to help you. Have faith that you will find some peace in your life. And, we are here to support you.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2016
Location: Northwest U.S.
Posts: 778
Welcome Pistons! This is a great place to start your journey to sobriety. Like you, I was a high achiever in academics, athletics, etc. This disease does not discriminate. My only advice is that you do what is necessary to quit drinking, so you can get things back on track. If AA isn't right for you, there are lots of other avenues. For now, though, just know that you have lots of support here and loads of people that can relate to whatever experiences you have been through. Keep reading and keep posting. Best of luck to you! Congratulations on taking a very big first step.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: MN
Posts: 8,704
Welcome to SR pistons. All that discipline you had to become all state in sports and academics is still inside you. To get things back on track you'll need to draw from that strength and discipline. For many, sobriety is the fight of our lives, but it is 100% worth it. I didn't quit drinking until I was 48, so you are still pretty young believe it or not. So much in front of you. Wish you the best.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2016
Location: Australia
Posts: 68
Welcome pistons. Like the other posters have said, there are a few different recovery plans that you can utilise. You may find that AA might work for you later too, once you get a little sober time up. Whichever path you choose, the biggest realisation most of us found is that we couldn't do it alone. We needed support and a plan. I am only a few months into my sobriety, and am just getting clear of the life being blah and not being able to see a life without alcohol. The community here is wonderful, and will provide you with great support, and be able to tell you from their experiences things that may help you as you travel the path to sobriety. Good luck mate. It does get better.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,439
Hi and welcome pistons - I think the first thing everyone has to do to make their life better is put down the drink and/or drugs.
The second part is learning to be happy after we've done that.
For me just not drinking wasn't enough to make me happy.
I started drinking in the first place because I was unhappy...
so I had to finally face those demons. I saw doctors and counsellors for a little while but what really helped was time, and this community.
They helped me find a sense of purpose again - through helping others - and that made all the difference for me.
We're a very supportive community here and we'll give you all the advice help and support we can to help you find joy and a little hope again too
How long have you been sober?
D
The second part is learning to be happy after we've done that.
For me just not drinking wasn't enough to make me happy.
I started drinking in the first place because I was unhappy...
so I had to finally face those demons. I saw doctors and counsellors for a little while but what really helped was time, and this community.
They helped me find a sense of purpose again - through helping others - and that made all the difference for me.
We're a very supportive community here and we'll give you all the advice help and support we can to help you find joy and a little hope again too
How long have you been sober?
D
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2017
Posts: 36
Originally Posted by Dee74 
Hi and welcome pistons - I think the first thing everyone has to do to make their life better is put down the drink and/or drugs.
The second part is learning to be happy after we've done that.
For me just not drinking wasn't enough to make me happy.
I started drinking in the first place because I was unhappy...
so I had to finally face those demons. I saw doctors and counsellors for a little while but what really helped was time, and this community.
They helped me find a sense of purpose again - through helping others - and that made all the difference for me.
We're a very supportive community here and we'll give you all the advice help and support we can to help you find joy and a little hope again too
How long have you been sober?
D
The second part is learning to be happy after we've done that.
For me just not drinking wasn't enough to make me happy.
I started drinking in the first place because I was unhappy...
so I had to finally face those demons. I saw doctors and counsellors for a little while but what really helped was time, and this community.
They helped me find a sense of purpose again - through helping others - and that made all the difference for me.
We're a very supportive community here and we'll give you all the advice help and support we can to help you find joy and a little hope again too
How long have you been sober?
D
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2017
Posts: 36
Originally Posted by redfalcon
Welcome pistons. Like the other posters have said, there are a few different recovery plans that you can utilise. You may find that AA might work for you later too, once you get a little sober time up. Whichever path you choose, the biggest realisation most of us found is that we couldn't do it alone. We needed support and a plan. I am only a few months into my sobriety, and am just getting clear of the life being blah and not being able to see a life without alcohol. The community here is wonderful, and will provide you with great support, and be able to tell you from their experiences things that may help you as you travel the path to sobriety. Good luck mate. It does get better.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2017
Posts: 36
Originally Posted by soberandhonest
Welcome Pistons! This is a great place to start your journey to sobriety. Like you, I was a high achiever in academics, athletics, etc. This disease does not discriminate. My only advice is that you do what is necessary to quit drinking, so you can get things back on track. If AA isn't right for you, there are lots of other avenues. For now, though, just know that you have lots of support here and loads of people that can relate to whatever experiences you have been through. Keep reading and keep posting. Best of luck to you! Congratulations on taking a very big first step.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,439
I think for mind and body to really recuperate you need some decent completely sober time.
If you drink again, it's my experience that whole process starts over.
By 3 months totally sober I was starting to feel a little joy again...
D
If you drink again, it's my experience that whole process starts over.
By 3 months totally sober I was starting to feel a little joy again...
D
All is Change
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Australia
Posts: 1,284
Take yourself out of your head. For example: volunteer in a local homeless shelter serving soup to the homeless.
The point is doing something that you are not inclined to do but you recognise as being a good thing to do.
What happens is that during that time you'll still have your miseries coming up but you've got good duties to fulfill. Because you have chosen to do it and you are aware of yourself and why you are doing it you break down the barriers you have erected within yourself to keep the miseries buried where they just boil to rise and derail you again. Anyway, a chat to a therapist might be helpful. Otherwise I think mindful meditation is a good thing.
The point is doing something that you are not inclined to do but you recognise as being a good thing to do.
What happens is that during that time you'll still have your miseries coming up but you've got good duties to fulfill. Because you have chosen to do it and you are aware of yourself and why you are doing it you break down the barriers you have erected within yourself to keep the miseries buried where they just boil to rise and derail you again. Anyway, a chat to a therapist might be helpful. Otherwise I think mindful meditation is a good thing.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2017
Posts: 36
Originally Posted by Grymt
Take yourself out of your head. For example: volunteer in a local homeless shelter serving soup to the homeless.
The point is doing something that you are not inclined to do but you recognise as being a good thing to do.
What happens is that during that time you'll still have your miseries coming up but you've got good duties to fulfill. Because you have chosen to do it and you are aware of yourself and why you are doing it you break down the barriers you have erected within yourself to keep the miseries buried where they just boil to rise and derail you again. Anyway, a chat to a therapist might be helpful. Otherwise I think mindful meditation is a good thing.
The point is doing something that you are not inclined to do but you recognise as being a good thing to do.
What happens is that during that time you'll still have your miseries coming up but you've got good duties to fulfill. Because you have chosen to do it and you are aware of yourself and why you are doing it you break down the barriers you have erected within yourself to keep the miseries buried where they just boil to rise and derail you again. Anyway, a chat to a therapist might be helpful. Otherwise I think mindful meditation is a good thing.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 8,637
Originally Posted by Pistons54
Short and to the point im now 35 and got my 2nd DUI 2 and half years ago. The court here in Michigan gave me a straight to jail ticket for six months. Worst experience of my life. None of my family members were much drinkers and never been to jail. I felt and still feel like I'm the ugly duckling. Everyone in my family was very supportive but I would still get drunk. But they knew I went back to my old ways and say something mean or a text which I would have never done if sober. Everyone shyed away from me except my father and I don't blame them. I would go a while without drinking then just one drink would make me go on a one week bender. I feel so ashamed. Background..All state for sports and academics..student council. .. Community volunteer..Etc. I drank but not even close to what I do now and never was depressed. Got my degree and a great job. Then a great gf. Then at age 25 my best friend died and gf broke up. Then I started to drink..I mean drink alot. Lost job etc. Still haven't got my license back so now now riding my bike to work in 12" of snow. I've tried AA in the very small community and didn't care for it. Now being sober I can't even barely sleep at night because of all the damage I have done already. I was Catholic and believed in God. Now I'm even wondering what's the purpose in life. I'm not suicidal at all but just feel blah. I have many neices and nephews and I feel left out because I don't have kids. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. There's much more to this story but my fingers are getting sore. Have a great day
And being plagued with a damaging relationship with alcohol.
You can do this.... you can embrace sobriety and have a deep, rewarding, abundant life.
But you'll have to choose it. You'll have to act in honor of that choice. You'll have to be willing to stick with some things that "aren't for you" or that you don't feel comfortable with. Because it turns out - change is seldom "for you" or comfortable..... but is often necessary to the eventual attainment of your own growth and happiness.
I was once in a similar place. But now I'm three years sober, happy, grateful and engaged in life.
You can do it, too.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2017
Posts: 36
Originally Posted by MicroMacro
What do you want?
Why aren't you going after it?
Why aren't you going after it?
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