Just wondering
 

Hi everyone.In general,Its onwards and upwards for me,hopefuly many more of us you are at this point on your sober journey too.Can anyone else relate to this?The one and only issue I personaly stumble at is difficult anniversaries,especialy these last 10months as I am 10months into recovery.Meaning the numbness and fog of my alcoholics brain has well and truely lifted.I was diagnosed with PTSD several years ago as a direct result of truamatic life events.To get to the point,is it ok to be overly upset by difficult anniversaries that are not directly connected to the original cause of my personal PTSD?Or is it simply delayed reactions as I am in recovery and thinking clearly.Really appreciate any replies.

Hi Jojay
Being in recovery doesn't make me Superman...or Gandhi :)

I still get annoyed I get frustrated, I still get scared and I fly off the handle still even tho these days it's mainly at myself.

I can still hold a grudge and I'm still angry at things that happened 40 years ago.

I'm doing my best to work on all that...but for now my job is to never let those feelings own me for too long...cos that could take me back to drinking drugging and God knows what else if I let it.

I'm not 5 or 15 anymore.

I'm 50 and I try and remember the great and truly bounteousb lessings of my life now.

They're more real to me that the phantoms of the past :)

Exercise is good for distraction for me, so is playing music. Sometimes being around good friends helps too.

D

hi jojay

in aa we celebrate 1 mo, 2 mo, 3, 6, 9, 1 yr, 2 yr .....

so heres a 9 mo chip for ya great job!

https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com...58920986a7.jpg

:You_Rock_

Thanks Dee and January.I am ok with trusting my own instincts,gut reactions.Guess I must not associate negative plus unsettleing feelings with being in recovery,all the time.Dee,you did indeed encourage me to stop winding the tape backwards,in your reply to one of my previous threads,which was in a similar viene.I am also 50yrs old.maybe I am immature!Like to feel its being young at heart!God bless

Oh I understand this. I'm so much newer at sobriety but I'm experiencing plenty of those feelings. It's difficult, but SO much better than the alternative.
Hopefully those feelings will lessen for you soon. If not you'll have time to work on sorting them and be able to cope in a better manner. :)

Thanks starstarstar.Stay focused on your recovery journey too.Blessings

10 months sober is great ,
this will be the first time round dealing with difficult aniversaries sober i guess ?

I gave myself time and room , stayed close to my recovery plan and got through :)

With more sober time , 1 year , 2 years i think i learned the routine , the map and the territory of my own emotional landscapes and how to navigate them without falling down or getting lost .

It's a work in progress .

Bestwishes, m

Hi Mecanix.Yes,first time round.Many thanks for your supportive reply.It gave me very helpful insight.

I think it's normal to get anxious about upcoming sober anniversaries. Congratulations on 10 months sober JoJay! :c011:

Thankyou!Much appreciated.Being normal,at long last,Is just so great.

First, congrats on 10 months sober! I've found that recovery is a learning curve. At 7+ years sober, I'm still learning and growing. Just give it time. Life is full of ups and downs, but living sober has taught me how to deal with the bad as well as the good.

I have been struggling with this for over a year now. I have had 2 very competent counsellors (alcohol) advise me to raise C-PTSD with my psycho't.
Too many complex memories and emotions to identify as just being 'awake' from booze.