New and concerned
 

I have never been a big drinker but my life took a dark twist and i found myself on a couple occasions turning to drinking to numb the pain. On one such occasion i picked my son who is a year and a half old up from day care while intoxicated... I feel terrible and it ignited my flame to seek help and i started seeing a therapist. I told my therapist about my horrific decision to pick up my son and now she wants to meet before our next appointment to discuss the fact that she may have to report me. My son is my everything and i am so worried i am going to lose him over my poor choice

welcome

Hi whenlifehappens

I'm an Aussie so my remarks are from my own understanding of how things work here.

I'm not sure what country you're posting from and I'm not a parent or a medical professional, but it seems weird to me that you could be reported for one mistake?

It was obviously wrong to do what you did, and I know you see that - but I'm sure you're doing all you can to rectify your problem.

If there's no more to the story, I'm baffled really.

I'd consider it very very unlikely indeed you'd lose your son unless there was a prior pattern of doing things like this, or you were arrested and breathalysed for dangerous driving or something.

D

WLH- hi there and welcome. Firstly so well done on seeing a therapist and posting here with honesty. That takes real courage. You have identified a problem, felt the guilt and used that guilt pro actively. It is what we do afterwards that makes a difference. About the reporting bit I cannot comment. Firstly DO NOT DRINK- anything. Go through with seeing the therapist and follow your honest path. You have had a big wake up call- keep the momentum going. PJ

I don't know where you are but in the U.S. anyone in a position that oversees children is court mandated to report if there are any signs of abuse or anything that could bring harm to a child. This includes teachers, daycare workers, etc. This also includes therapists. When I signed my paperwork for counseling after my DUI this court mandated information was included in the paperwork.

Here's the thing though:

If she's meeting with you beforehand I don't want to make any guesses but it appears she needs to feel that this decision was a one time poor choice and will never happen again. I think that due to your realization of the possible consequences of what you did that possibility is no longer existent and she wants to feel confident about it. It's scary, I know. She's looking out for the best interests of your child who has no choice. You do have a choice and letting her know that you understand how serious this is and that's exactly why you are seeing her will help.

Good luck and let us know how it goes. You're doing a good thing here. I think the fact that you even disclosed that to her shows how you feel about the situation and it will never happen again,

great demonstration of humility/ willingness to admit that there is a problem and then take action and seek help

:You_Rock_

It's a double edged sword unfortunately. You did something wrong, you know that, and you confided in a therapist for help. You would think you would have a "safe zone" to spill your guts in order to get the help you need, but the therapist is in a position where she doesn't know that this was a one time mistake, and she has a duty to protect those who can't protect themselves.

I would make sure you drive the point home that this was a one time mistake and it will never happen again.

Chiming in from the U.S. here. She likely has the authority to use discretion and it is not mandated that she report you. On the other hand, if you do this again and something bad happens, she could potentially be held liable for NOT reporting you. Its a tough deal but I hope you'll be ok.

I doubt that you would lose your son over this one incident, but you may have to convince authorities that you will not drink and drive again.