TheRuralJuror

Tonight is the end of day 3 for me, and after dinner I talked to my husband and told him I'm an alcoholic.

He was kind of surprised when I said it. He knows when I drink on weekends I drink a lot, but he (like me previously) thought an alcoholic is only someone who needs to drink daily. I don't usually drink during the week. He's never bothered me about drinking too much, so it's never been something we have discussed in the 7 years we've been together.

What he didn't know, though, is how much I drink after he goes to bed on the weekends. I'll sometimes drink til 3-4am, and when I crawl into bed, I'll tell him I fell asleep on the couch. I admitted this, and he was very surprised at that.

I talked about SR and finding such good advice and hearing about experiences here, and how it helped me decide I am in fact an alcoholic and solidified my need to quit right now. I'm so glad to have it off my chest, it feels like such a release.

He is completely supportive of my decision to get sober (which I figured he would be, he's a pretty awesome husband). He's not a big drinker (it was always my 5 drinks to his 1) so he doesn't completely understand my need to drink excessively, but he knows my biological mother is an alcoholic (as are several other members of her family).

I'm not really sure why I'm sharing all this tonight, I just feel so good about being on this path. I am riding high right now and I'm trying to ride that wave into the weekend/through the mini vacation I'm going on tomorrow through Sunday.

I am so grateful I found SR.

BixBees505

Hey, Rural! Good work!!!!
Enjoy the boost this gave you, to be honest and get such vital support from your dear guy. Just be ready with a plan for when you don't feel as awesome. How will you deal with it when he is in bed and....you aren't sleeping yet.

BrendaChenowyth

Congratulations, this is fantastic news! Good luck. One day at a time.

bethshebas

Wow you are really brave.
i'm glad he was supportive.

Ultramarathoner

Good Stuff!

heartcore

Yaay! That was a courageous conversation, and it sounds like he is an awesome partner who heard you & wants to support you!

This is a very good thing! You were brave. Well done!

least

I'm glad he is supportive of your sobriety.

The longer you stay sober, the better you'll feel.

AlaskaGirl

Great job! That took a lot of courage, and it shows awesome commitment to stopping.

My husband is super sweet and pretty supportive too. I am grateful for him every day. The only downside I have with him is that since he doesn't really understand my problem, he is pretty lax about the idea of my recovery. He will make casual comments about drinking, and I'll have to remind him I don't do that anymore. I know he doesn't understand how bad my problem was, and that's OK with me.

TheRuralJuror

Thank you all for your kind words & encouragement.

I know he loves me and he is an excellent partner - but I was scared to death to have the conversation. So happy I did, though!

soberandhonest

Nice job ruraljuror! Like you, I'm very fortunate to have a supportive SO.

TheRuralJuror

I feel very lucky. I'm not sure how people do this who don't have someone who supports them fully. Glad you have a great SO!!

CLAS

That's really great rural! Very uplifting post.

Hevyn

What a great post, TRJ - it made me smile. I'm so glad you found us & decided to share your journey.

No one in my life realized how much I drank until I was completely out of control. It's good you decided to take action when you realized where this was headed. It isn't how often we drink, but what it does to us when we do drink. I once drank only on weekends. Sunday was such a hard day - I'd drink late into the night - so Monday was horrible. Then there was the fateful Monday I was so hung over I decided to have a few sips before going to work. That led to drinking at work at one point - a new low. When I found SR I was drinking all day with a ruined life - desperate to find a way back to normalcy. This won't happen to you. I'm glad you've taken steps to keep it from pulling you under.

Anna

I'm glad you have your husband's support. I hid my drinking, as much as possible, and it is a relief when it's all finally out in the open. I was really tired of hiding and planning. I'm glad you are feeling positive about stopping drinking.

stargazer016

Great post RJ! It is awesome to have a spouse backing up your war with the bottle. Congrats on three days!

Delilah1

I'm so glad you spoke with your husband, and that he was so supportive. I a. Also glad you found SR.

Make sure you buy yourself some drinks to take on your vacation. My husband and I went to Vegas this past weekend from Friday-Monday, and I drank lots of sparkling water with lime when we were out to dinner. Sparkling water, Arizona Zero Green Tea, and Diet Soda have been my go to drinks. Sparkling waters are really good while out.

Looking forward to hearing all about your vacation, and don't forget you can check in here while you are away.

MLD51

Great that you talked to your husband! That was brave of you, and shows that you are committed to this. Rigorous honesty is one of the most important things to me in my sobriety. I lied a lot, to a lot of people, when I was drinking. It was a huge source of anxiety for me. Being honest is a new way of living for me, and it feels great. Keep the lines of communication open with your husband - it's wonderful he is so supportive. I don't have a life partner, but I have a few very supportive close friends, and I don't know if I could have done this without them.

dwtbd

RJ
Take that fantastic feeling and run with it for as long as it lasts, forever even!
After deciding to quit , keeping the AV on notice that you mean business can involve some Jedi mindtricks. You can try a novel approach " I was an alcoholic, and I plan to never be one again"
Teetotalers Unite ! ( and yeah those droids are ok )

TheRuralJuror

I love your post -so, so much! I read it to my husband (along with a few other comments) and he said "Wow, that's a group of people who really get this, huh?"

Thank you ALL!!