newb1224

Thought I would just "have a few" after work. Despite never being able to have only two, I somehow convinced myself that wouldnt be the case. Ended up drinking from 6pm til about 1am, where I slipped on a wet floor and knocked myself unconscious and ended up at the hospital all night. I'm so tired of fighting this addiction. I just want to be sober.

tomls

It's great that you came right here! You have to want sobriety enough to go through the hard part which is probably the first week or month but it does get easier. Keep reading and posting here, It has helped me a lot!

Anna

Welcome!

I think most of us have had to come to terms with the fact that there is no such thing as having a couple of drinks. It never ends well. I'm glad you went to the hospital and that you are okay. Are you ready to stop drinking?

newb1224

Yes, I am ready. The binge drinking and blackouts have gotten out of hand. I'm hoping to check out some AA meetings this week and also have been in talks with a psychologist. I am ready to change my life.

Algorithm

Those binge/blackout cycles will probably get even worse over time. If you didn't break any bones, count your blessings. It's very common for blackout drunks to slip and fall, and break bones, or get into fights in a blackout.

Fix this problem. It's the easier, softer way.

Quit290117

Welcome I am sure everyone here can relate to what happened. It's hard accepting you can't drink again. I did 10 weeks and thought I could control it. Only had a few binges but the blackouts and the hangovers were some of the worst. As I have read on here it's a progressive illness and it scared me to think where I might be heading. So although I might control it one night and go home thinking I've not got a drink problem the next time will most certainly be a black out and then spend days getting over it until I felt well enough to drink again. That has repeated for years. Good luck and I hope you are feeling ok after your fall.

Alexf91

I'm in the sameboat stuck in a cycle of blackouts and relapse just want to beat this addiction but can't seem to figure it out hopefully this time is my last time

Kaleya

You relapsed, but you can get back on the wagon. The "maybe I could handle one or two" thinking is the enemy of sobriety, and it's not a rational thought. I have learned to recognize that as the AV, not me. I hope you recover well from your fall. You can do this.

Hevyn

Hi Newb - I'm sorry you're going through this. That was the hardest thing for me - admitting & acknowledging there would never be 'one'. I wasted many years insisting I didn't have to give it up entirely. Maybe you'll be more determined now, after the latest set back. You can do it.

Done4today

Welcome Newb,

You've come to the right place to start your sobriety journey. So much help and knowledge here. Use this resource to keep you from more damage. Many of us have been where you are and we want to help you get where we are. Good luck and keep coming back to post.

Dee74

Hi newb - I'm sorry for what happened.

Posting here regularly and AA sound like a good basis for a plan - I think you're realising now this is a lifetime commitment ?

stay focused and committed. Blackouts and drunken accidents are a thing of the past for me now.

D

alyn528

You got this!!! One day at a time!! Yes, AA meetings are a good thing and especially get yourself an sponsor too even if it's an temporary one for now. Work the steps. Hang in there.

least

I hope this time you can make sobriety stick.

Zebra1275

Thought I would just "have a few"

knocked myself unconscious and ended up at the hospital all night.

I think you made a wise choice to join this forum.

Step 1 of AA is "We admitted we were powerless over alcohol - that our lives had become unmanageable."

Why don't you try an AA meeting and learn about the rest of the steps?

TNTStill

Sorry to hear. Hope you're feeling/feel better

heartcore

If you fell on a wet floor & were knocked unconscious while sober, it still would have been a crappy night in the ER, but you would have felt totally different inside.

When you are sober & bad things happen, it's just the random flow of life. When you are drinking, and those exact same things happen, you get to lay under the whole wet stinking heavy blanket of shame that - "maybe it is your fault. You created this. This is the cost of your behavior."

It is a nasty, sodden blanket.

My NA sponsor was visiting my house today & she said "the most valuable gift I've gotten in 3 years of abstinence is the ability to meet people's eyes - in every situation. It was not even something I knew I didn't have before, but it means everything."

When we are using/drinking, anything that goes wrong is probably sort of our fault. When we are clean and sober, we just "meet challenges."

I'm glad you are ok. It's a message experience. Don't waste the learning...

columbus

"Ended up drinking from 6pm til about 1am, where I slipped on a wet floor and knocked myself unconscious and ended up at the hospital all night."

As the man said, "There's your sign."

May it be the last one needed.

Delilah1

Hi Newb,

Glad you are okay, and that you came right back. I learned the hard way many times that I could not just have one drink. I'm close to 14 months sober, and it is much easier to abstain completely than attempt moderation.

It really does get easier with time, and waking up sober is a wonderful thing.

MIRecovery

I checked out a lot of AA meetings over the years but I kept drinking. When I started going daily, got a sponsor, and worked the steps i have been sober ever since.

AA is not a spectator sport. You have to play the game to get sober

shauninspain

Acceptance really is the key. It's no biggie, your body is just not able to cope with alcohol. Like some people cannot drink milk, eat chocolate or nuts. You're not designed to process alcohol, neither am I. Don't make a big deal of it, just accept.