Losing my job.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2016
Posts: 101
Losing my job.
Today the agency I work for went before a legislative committee to defend not dismantling us. It didnt go well. I have worked here 7 years. I am very scared and depressed that I won't have a job in a couple months. I am the breadwinner in my family. I want to drink.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: W Washington
Posts: 11,589
and tell us how drinking will solve this?
look i get how much of a shock this is, and that it has a ripple effect. but now is the time to clearly assess the situation and then make your plan of ATTACK.
there is NO reason to drink.
EVER.
only an excuse.
look i get how much of a shock this is, and that it has a ripple effect. but now is the time to clearly assess the situation and then make your plan of ATTACK.
there is NO reason to drink.
EVER.
only an excuse.
Recovering
Join Date: May 2012
Location: UK
Posts: 1,361
I'm sorry to hear the stress you are going through.
I lost my job a few years ago (and again I was the sole bread winner). It was a very stressful time. But I can honestly say that after a while it all turned out really for the good. We were able to move to an area of the country we always wanted to move to. We wouldn't have done that otherwise. I hope you don't lose your job. But life doesn't end if you do, and sometimes you can look back and see these changes as leading to good things.
Whatever happens, drinking won't help you or your family. But you know that.
I lost my job a few years ago (and again I was the sole bread winner). It was a very stressful time. But I can honestly say that after a while it all turned out really for the good. We were able to move to an area of the country we always wanted to move to. We wouldn't have done that otherwise. I hope you don't lose your job. But life doesn't end if you do, and sometimes you can look back and see these changes as leading to good things.
Whatever happens, drinking won't help you or your family. But you know that.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2017
Posts: 110
drinking is only going to make the fear and depression worse. for an hour it might feel a little better, but that's only because you are numbing it, but I can hands down guarantee when you wake up, you wont just have to worry about the job. You will feel the anxiety and shame of relapsing, and that's if you manage to get sober again tomorrow, you might not. Its a huge risk. Write down a pro and con list of why you should drink, which do you think will win out? I'm sorry you had such bad news, I'm sorry its caused all those feelings, I just know listening to your AV will make it all so much worse when you are doing so well.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2016
Posts: 101
It's crazy how fast that AV creeps up on you. I have been able to change my mind and I think I owe much of that to being able to post here my thoughts and feelings when they creep up. Thanks for always listening. I don't know what will happen with my job, but I know I won't drink today.
quat
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: terra (mostly)firma
Posts: 4,823
The AV can be fast and loud as hell, but You always have the power, sorry to hear about the work stress, but good job keeping control and your eye on the ball.
One good thing to come out of today, proof that even when IT screams " I want" , certainly doesn't mean a 'have to' follows. Keep truckin
One good thing to come out of today, proof that even when IT screams " I want" , certainly doesn't mean a 'have to' follows. Keep truckin
Forum Leader
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 16,945
I just went through a massive reorganization in my workplace that had my job and dozens of others on the chopping block. I was fortunate enough to keep my job but many were not, and no one knew for months. I saw some people leave with over 20 years of service.
As others have mentioned, drinking would be the absolute worst possible decision you could make right now. Glad to see you've made the decision not to - it will only make everything even worse.
What you could start doing now is updating resume, or making one if you don't have one. Not sure where you work but a lot of companies and organizations have resources for employees who are in your shoes...to help you find another job or even get training for a new/different job.
As others have mentioned, drinking would be the absolute worst possible decision you could make right now. Glad to see you've made the decision not to - it will only make everything even worse.
What you could start doing now is updating resume, or making one if you don't have one. Not sure where you work but a lot of companies and organizations have resources for employees who are in your shoes...to help you find another job or even get training for a new/different job.
Guest
Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 1,174
Sympathies Banana, and congratulations on not drinking.
I went through this 6 months back. My situation was 4 years of annual 'restructures'.....like you I felt / knew it was coming.
I made an interim plan.....not a plan for where everything went in the future. Just a careful inventory of assets and liabilities and worked out how I'd handle it. Did some research into payouts etc.....made weekly budget and looked at how long I could run it.
So when the day came and the envelope was flipped onto the desk I knew exactly what I was going to do.
This made the whole experience way easier to deal with. At that time I wasn't drinking and it was a big part of not drinking through that particular time.
Best wishes mate......
I went through this 6 months back. My situation was 4 years of annual 'restructures'.....like you I felt / knew it was coming.
I made an interim plan.....not a plan for where everything went in the future. Just a careful inventory of assets and liabilities and worked out how I'd handle it. Did some research into payouts etc.....made weekly budget and looked at how long I could run it.
So when the day came and the envelope was flipped onto the desk I knew exactly what I was going to do.
This made the whole experience way easier to deal with. At that time I wasn't drinking and it was a big part of not drinking through that particular time.
Best wishes mate......
Member
Join Date: Jan 2017
Location: USA
Posts: 106
Sorry to hear you are going through a rough patch. I was in a similar place back in 2014. My wife was pregnant with my son, I was preparing to be a father, and then my boss fires me - on a Monday, no less.
It came out of the blue - at least it did at the time. I was drinking heavily, arriving to work late most days, and miserable at this job. And I'm sure people noticed. I was also, hungover every time I showed up to work (very hard to hide). I'm just not one to quit, really anything.
In the end, getting away from that place was a blessing. The pay was terrible, the place was depressing, and there was no room for/possibility of advancement.
I know you've had this job for a long time and cannot imagine losing it, but it might be a blessing in disguise. Try to line up another job in case you lose your current post. Rework the resume and starting applying elsewhere. Do this instead of drink, to stay busy and proactive. This was my wife's advice years ago, when I was in the worst job of my life. What did I do? Drink and b1tch about how horrible my job was. Try to take action now so that you have something lined up.
It came out of the blue - at least it did at the time. I was drinking heavily, arriving to work late most days, and miserable at this job. And I'm sure people noticed. I was also, hungover every time I showed up to work (very hard to hide). I'm just not one to quit, really anything.
In the end, getting away from that place was a blessing. The pay was terrible, the place was depressing, and there was no room for/possibility of advancement.
I know you've had this job for a long time and cannot imagine losing it, but it might be a blessing in disguise. Try to line up another job in case you lose your current post. Rework the resume and starting applying elsewhere. Do this instead of drink, to stay busy and proactive. This was my wife's advice years ago, when I was in the worst job of my life. What did I do? Drink and b1tch about how horrible my job was. Try to take action now so that you have something lined up.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: NC
Posts: 662
Drinking will cause a stressful situation to escalate faster then fast. What benefit would having a drink have on the situation? Making a list of pros and cons has helped me in the past to put things into perspective.
How about taking steps to better prepare yourself what could be the outcome of this situation? Hopefully everything will go smoothly and there will be nothing to worry about, but how about planning for if it doesn't? Searching for possible other jobs, getting your resume in check, talking with your spouse about what the options are, looking at finances and determining how long you can go without a job, etc. etc. Instead of drinking start planning for the future.
Life has ups and downs, and as hard as it is to handle certain situations, staying sober and in control of your life is the way to beat these hard situations, not by drinking or using.
Keep your head up! As hard as it is to do, you can do it!
How about taking steps to better prepare yourself what could be the outcome of this situation? Hopefully everything will go smoothly and there will be nothing to worry about, but how about planning for if it doesn't? Searching for possible other jobs, getting your resume in check, talking with your spouse about what the options are, looking at finances and determining how long you can go without a job, etc. etc. Instead of drinking start planning for the future.
Life has ups and downs, and as hard as it is to handle certain situations, staying sober and in control of your life is the way to beat these hard situations, not by drinking or using.
Keep your head up! As hard as it is to do, you can do it!
Member
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Baton Rouge, La.
Posts: 15,236
Continue to work on your recovery program,
loading up on meetings to help you to remain
sober, clear mineded and focus on what is more
important at the moment.
In the meantime, breath, pray for strength,
guidance and to help make right choices
down the road.
The more you talk and share your situation
with others, then I'm pretty sure someone
will have a good suggestion to help you in
possibly finding another job.
In doing so, you will realize that you are
not alone in this situation and that there
is hope waiting for you while strengthening
your recovery program and life.
At the end of my 25 yr marriage, I did the
foot work to find a job to support myself
after being dependent for my entire marriage.
It would be the first time to be on my own,
having my own apt., and working.
I applied for a bank teller job I hadn't done
for 25 yrs and got the position which allowed
me to move quickly. Over the yrs banking
had changed a bit using more computer than
they had back in the day.
I had to be trained and because I wasn't
grasping the computer quick enough, they
had to let me go from that location I applied
to. When I left, I was scarred to no end because
what was I gonna do now.
So I went to my meetings, talked to folks in
the program of my situation and did the footwork
of applying to different jobs that I would be
interested in. So far nothing was panning out,
until someone mentioned to me that a local
bakery had a hiring sign up looking for people
to work.
WOW....that one I didn't see coming nor
even thought about even tho I had baked
soooo many wonderful things to take to many
of my meetings as my service work, but never
thought about working in a bakery.
Anyway....I applied, interviewed and got
hired almost immediately. WOW, I said.
I was absolutely amazed at how all I did
was do the footwork in recovery and place
my Faith in the Man upstairs.
Keep strong, stay sober, work your
program, do your footwork and
be ready for a miracle to happen.
loading up on meetings to help you to remain
sober, clear mineded and focus on what is more
important at the moment.
In the meantime, breath, pray for strength,
guidance and to help make right choices
down the road.
The more you talk and share your situation
with others, then I'm pretty sure someone
will have a good suggestion to help you in
possibly finding another job.
In doing so, you will realize that you are
not alone in this situation and that there
is hope waiting for you while strengthening
your recovery program and life.
At the end of my 25 yr marriage, I did the
foot work to find a job to support myself
after being dependent for my entire marriage.
It would be the first time to be on my own,
having my own apt., and working.
I applied for a bank teller job I hadn't done
for 25 yrs and got the position which allowed
me to move quickly. Over the yrs banking
had changed a bit using more computer than
they had back in the day.
I had to be trained and because I wasn't
grasping the computer quick enough, they
had to let me go from that location I applied
to. When I left, I was scarred to no end because
what was I gonna do now.
So I went to my meetings, talked to folks in
the program of my situation and did the footwork
of applying to different jobs that I would be
interested in. So far nothing was panning out,
until someone mentioned to me that a local
bakery had a hiring sign up looking for people
to work.
WOW....that one I didn't see coming nor
even thought about even tho I had baked
soooo many wonderful things to take to many
of my meetings as my service work, but never
thought about working in a bakery.
Anyway....I applied, interviewed and got
hired almost immediately. WOW, I said.
I was absolutely amazed at how all I did
was do the footwork in recovery and place
my Faith in the Man upstairs.
Keep strong, stay sober, work your
program, do your footwork and
be ready for a miracle to happen.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,415
I hate uncertainty too, and fear can really do a number on you, but I believe you can be ready for whatever opportunities are coming. so long as you stay in recovery
Wishing you the best bananas
D
Wishing you the best bananas
D
Trudgin
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 6,348
That fear is painful, yes - uncertainty.
I have gone from the "penthouse to the outhouse" financially in last few years. While scary, my view is that I can only keep working on what's put in front of me daily, do my utmost in all things large and small. Keep truckin........
First I take a drink, then the drink takes me. No sense is made when that happens, retarding much hope of fruitful outcomes. Breadwinners Win when we don't drink!
I have gone from the "penthouse to the outhouse" financially in last few years. While scary, my view is that I can only keep working on what's put in front of me daily, do my utmost in all things large and small. Keep truckin........
First I take a drink, then the drink takes me. No sense is made when that happens, retarding much hope of fruitful outcomes. Breadwinners Win when we don't drink!
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,491
Bananas, I'm sorry you're going through this situation. I've been in situations at work when companies are cutting back and the uncertainty is so stressful for everyone. As others have said, work on your resume, make a plan and do what you can to prepare, and hope for the best.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: The Great Outdoors
Posts: 1,992
So very glad you changed your thinking around Bananas. Drinking was never a one night or one time thing ...It is so hard to get back on track once you cave in. I am still here to tell you...that last hangover where all I could do was stare not able to focus on anything scared the heck out of me. So far...I haven't had the AV creep up. If it does...I will never forget the outcome. Also wanted to add that when they did a reorganization with my Cooperative, we could bid for other jobs within. Not sure if you have that option or not but just a thought. I wish the best for you!
I hope you can stay sober.
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