Day 4 - It's nights like tonight I remember why I drank!
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Join Date: Jan 2017
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Day 4 - It's nights like tonight I remember why I drank!
Worked all day (in a fairly high stress/ high demanding job). Got a call from my sister that she needed me to pick up her kid from day care when I got out of work. Picked up my niece, raced and picked up my younger kids then drove across town to pick up my older kid (talk about a full car!) got home and heated up leftover soup for everyone for dinner. Sat at my kitchen table with one of my kids for 1.5 hours (not exaggerating either!) as she ate her ONE bowl of soup. Got into an argument with said kid when I told her she had to take a bath & go to bed after finishing her 1.5 hour long dinner (All the while I'm trying to run bills/ household budget). My niece at one point decided to remove her pants/ pull-up and poop on the floor (you know ... because why not!). Put everyone to bed (soup kid first kicking and screaming/ crying), at some point my sister picked up my niece (I'm honestly not even sure what time that occurred!) & paid me with a bottle of my favorite brand of wine �� (I've neglected to mention my newly found sobriety). I took it and said thank you.
So here I now sit, alone, quiet house, kids asleep, hubby at work & I'm sipping on ... a cup of tea ... Right after my sister left I took the bottle of wine to the garage (just to get it out of the house) and texted my hubs about it so he knows to remove it when he gets home (and it ensures I can't bust it open now!)
Don't get me wrong, there's a big part of me that desperately wanted to crack that bad boy open and stick a curly straw in it and go to town! ... but then there was the even BIGGER part of me that remembers this morning and how great it felt to wake up and go to work not hungover & not have to mull through the day with a pounding headache/ nausea from binge drinking the night before.
My tea may not taste as yummy as that bottle of wine, but the feeling of being sober, happy & healthy again is FAR more delicious.
Also, I need to invest in some tastier teas ...
So here I now sit, alone, quiet house, kids asleep, hubby at work & I'm sipping on ... a cup of tea ... Right after my sister left I took the bottle of wine to the garage (just to get it out of the house) and texted my hubs about it so he knows to remove it when he gets home (and it ensures I can't bust it open now!)
Don't get me wrong, there's a big part of me that desperately wanted to crack that bad boy open and stick a curly straw in it and go to town! ... but then there was the even BIGGER part of me that remembers this morning and how great it felt to wake up and go to work not hungover & not have to mull through the day with a pounding headache/ nausea from binge drinking the night before.
My tea may not taste as yummy as that bottle of wine, but the feeling of being sober, happy & healthy again is FAR more delicious.
Also, I need to invest in some tastier teas ...
Last edited by Dee74; 01-30-2017 at 10:20 PM.
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Join Date: May 2012
Location: canada
Posts: 7,242
congratulations, firstla, well done.
smart move to ake the ethanol (now doesn't tat sound much less enticing than fancy labels? ) out to the garage and enlist your hubby's help. not engaging with yourself in a will i/won't i set-up. awesome!
yep. good and interesting teas can be had these days. indulge yourself!
smart move to ake the ethanol (now doesn't tat sound much less enticing than fancy labels? ) out to the garage and enlist your hubby's help. not engaging with yourself in a will i/won't i set-up. awesome!
yep. good and interesting teas can be had these days. indulge yourself!
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Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: California
Posts: 13,040
Very nicely done, you will feel great waking up tomorrow. I really like cold Arizona Zero Green Tea, as well as Sleepy Time Vanilla Tea.
As a mom, I couldn't help but chuckle as I read your post. I have definitely had many of those moments when we all get home from school/work, and adding an extra kid to the mix makes it that much harder!!
Enjoy your hangover free morning.
As a mom, I couldn't help but chuckle as I read your post. I have definitely had many of those moments when we all get home from school/work, and adding an extra kid to the mix makes it that much harder!!
Enjoy your hangover free morning.
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Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 6,902
Thanks for sharing.
I remember why I drank as well. And then, most importantly, I remember why I stopped. I play the tape forward and remind myself where the drink will take me. And I choose not to go back there.
Wishing you all the best for your continued sobriety and recovery. BB
I remember why I drank as well. And then, most importantly, I remember why I stopped. I play the tape forward and remind myself where the drink will take me. And I choose not to go back there.
Wishing you all the best for your continued sobriety and recovery. BB
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Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: New Orleans, LA
Posts: 985
We think we're rewarding ourselves after a day in which we have given & given, but alcohol is an anti-reward, wearing a sparkly mask.
Rest, self-honor, satisfaction, people who still need us in the evening, a cup of tea, a long bath, a good stretch/yoga, talking to friends, dancing in the living room, cuddling the pup, a great book - these rewards make us stronger.
The quiet end of the long & challenging day was (& sometimes still is) my rough spot.
Tonight I chose to go watch my adult son play sports at the park after a very long day. On Mondays, I wake early & go to therapy, then do work. It is already dark when I get home. But now I am present and available. The people I love still need my energy. My son played dramatically because he knew I was there watching. A good friend from AA needed support on the phone. I texted my daughter about how proud I was of her new recovery & life. I returned work emails about things I care about. I played with the pup.
The dishes still aren't done. It is too late to be awake on a work night. I didn't have any "me time" in this long, long day. But I am grateful. & I got a ton of sustaining love back, from people I love. And the "me time" I used to take with that bottle of wine didn't ever actually build my strength or give me anything meaningful back. It isolated me.
It was just a very busy & long Monday.
I'm proud of you. I'm proud of me. All of us. Just engaging in life, as it happens, on this particular Monday, (January 30, 2017 - one time only!) that we all were alive for & shared...
Rest, self-honor, satisfaction, people who still need us in the evening, a cup of tea, a long bath, a good stretch/yoga, talking to friends, dancing in the living room, cuddling the pup, a great book - these rewards make us stronger.
The quiet end of the long & challenging day was (& sometimes still is) my rough spot.
Tonight I chose to go watch my adult son play sports at the park after a very long day. On Mondays, I wake early & go to therapy, then do work. It is already dark when I get home. But now I am present and available. The people I love still need my energy. My son played dramatically because he knew I was there watching. A good friend from AA needed support on the phone. I texted my daughter about how proud I was of her new recovery & life. I returned work emails about things I care about. I played with the pup.
The dishes still aren't done. It is too late to be awake on a work night. I didn't have any "me time" in this long, long day. But I am grateful. & I got a ton of sustaining love back, from people I love. And the "me time" I used to take with that bottle of wine didn't ever actually build my strength or give me anything meaningful back. It isolated me.
It was just a very busy & long Monday.
I'm proud of you. I'm proud of me. All of us. Just engaging in life, as it happens, on this particular Monday, (January 30, 2017 - one time only!) that we all were alive for & shared...
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Join Date: Nov 2016
Posts: 126
That is awesome and you should feel really proud!
Maybe it is time to let your sister know of your decision. Because next time might not be as easy. You don't have to tell her your reasons. You don't have to tell her "forever". But letting her know now could possibly save you from slipping in the future. Ask yourself if thereason you haven't told her is because a part of you wants to keep the option open? Regardless, if you truly do have the desire to stop then it might be a good idea to work toward mentioning it to her.
Maybe it is time to let your sister know of your decision. Because next time might not be as easy. You don't have to tell her your reasons. You don't have to tell her "forever". But letting her know now could possibly save you from slipping in the future. Ask yourself if thereason you haven't told her is because a part of you wants to keep the option open? Regardless, if you truly do have the desire to stop then it might be a good idea to work toward mentioning it to her.
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