Minion09

So frustrated - I saw all the signs, yep watched them all. I thought to myself, I can have just 1 or 2... HA! And here I am, where I swore I would never be...

So, I need a pep talk... STAT!!!

Behappy1

I've never had 2 years in since drinking, but I have had some time in. Decided to test the waters. If I didn't get RIGHT BACK on the wagon, I was down and out for a few days or more, which drug on to a month on and off.

Your brain got a taste of alcohol. Starve it and don't feed it so you can get back to sobriety. Thank you for sharing and for the great reminder that I cannot dabble.

Midwest1981

2 years is great! no matter what that time can never be taken away from you.

Pick yourself up and get back on the wagon. That is the best thing to do. Work on the weak areas so it doesn't happen again.

january161992

the irony of getting sober is that i get better!

maybe i dont need meetings any more
maybe i dont need to call my sponsor
maybe i dont need to be of service to others
maybe i dont need to ask God for help


and wham im drunk


God bless Minion im glad youre back!

thomas11

Don't let a raindrop become a hurricane. You did it, its over, move on. But I am sorry to hear that you slipped, 2 years is fantastic.

Poppy79

Sorry to hear about your slip BUT...... how awesome that you made the decision to stop again.
I dont know how hard you fell, however, now is the time to refrain from beating yourself up over it and think to yourself that you had 2 years in the bag (bloody great accomplishment), you KNOW you can stop, you have done it before. Just try to remember in 2 years clean time not to get complacent.
I'm only 80 days in and I strive to get 2 years in. Be proud of that and chin up

JackDsMissus

Hi Minion09, I relate even down to the thinking that got you back drinking. I had 18 months then spent the next 6 right back where I was. Good thing is that we learn a bit more anytime this happens. I learnt that I can't moderate and I can't do it on my own and that there is a difference between abstaining from drinking and learning to live in my own skin sober. We have to stay active in our recovery and remember we can never be a normal drinker again. Back in the saddle, we can do this

InApickle

It's a complete battleground (as I am quickly finding out) get shot fall in the mud, Stagger to your feet hold your sword up high....and soldier on

Minion09

Thanks everyone!! The struggle is real today - I am filled to the MAX with anxiety and tired beyond belief. I have been battling a horrible cold for this entire month, finally got an antibiotic so that's good, but my head got the best of me cause my go to cure used to be brandy - well yeah, I thought maybe just maybe and that is making all things worse. I know in a couple of days I will feel human again, but right now I am crawling out of my skin and wanting to just drink one more to take the edge off... good thing I don't have anything handy.

Luchogarza

Drinking was just one event. Those 2 years are real and impressive. That drinking episode will not erase those 2 years. Get up and get going again. I hope I had the strength to make it that far.

Minion09

I wish it was just one event... it has been on and off for a few months and way on for a good week ''', the slippery slope to poor behavior. I know I can get up, just struggling with the aftermath right now. Thank for the encouragment.

August252015

Glad you made it back.

What was your plan for those two years, when it worked? What are you going to do this time- differently- to make it stick for good?

Minion09

I honestly put my trust in God - gave it all to him, truly believed! He took it, completely until I took it back by stopping my accountability, thinking I could have just one etc... That's the honest truth! Relying on self vs. trusting bigger hands have me. So back to finding trust - back to accountability, I can't have any not one cause one is at least 3-4.

Delilah1

Hi Minion,

Welcome back! You had two years so you know you can do this. Why don't you join us in the 24 hour thread. It is a good way to check in everyday, and you will find an incredibly supportive group who will be looking for you.

You've got this!
❤️Delilah

StartingOverNW

This! If you get back up and keep going this might look like a not so big deal learning experience a month or two from now, but if you continue to indulge, from personal experience, it will most likely get exponentially harder to get back up with each additional slip.

You made it to 2 years so you know what to do to continue sober from here, and I'm sure you can do it.

StartingOverNW

Ooops, I'm sorry I missed this reply before I replied. Anyway, I'm glad to see you joined the January class - hang in there.

Dee74

Hi Minion

Yeah it's hard to find that acceptance - that you really are an alcoholic and that it's the first drink that starts the madness and not the last.

Do you feel like you've really accepted that now...no drinking again..for any reason?

D

Hevyn

Good to see you, Minion - but sorry for your misery. I did it too - thought I could use willpower to just have 'a few'. No such thing for me, ever. Took many years to finally get it. I'm glad you posted. It's going to be alright.

Minion09

Hey Dee - good to be back! Yes! Madness! I have accepted it - now to power through these rough days back to a place of sanity of some sort! Thanks for the support - means a ton to me!