Hi. I am new.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2017
Location: Norway
Posts: 20
Hi. I am new.
Hi. I am new on this site. I am a bit unsure of my own situation. But i think i can count the days i have gone without drinking anything since may -16 on my fingers. My therapaut know i have issues with alcohol, but i have not told her the truth about how much and how often.... still, she says it is worriesom and i am likely to have a drinking problem.
I usually drink 5 0.5 liters of cider or beer a day. Almost always in the evening. So i tell my self i at least am sober most of the day!
I am so scared my husband will find out. He knows i am a bit to fond of drinking, but he doesn't know i drink that much, and every day....
I would like to change my ways, but i dont know if i can stop all together. I love to drink.....
So confused, Sorry for a long and not too informative post.
I usually drink 5 0.5 liters of cider or beer a day. Almost always in the evening. So i tell my self i at least am sober most of the day!
I am so scared my husband will find out. He knows i am a bit to fond of drinking, but he doesn't know i drink that much, and every day....
I would like to change my ways, but i dont know if i can stop all together. I love to drink.....
So confused, Sorry for a long and not too informative post.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: North of England
Posts: 1,442
Hi and welcome. That's a lot of cider to hide!
I hope you find the support you need here. There is loads of it!
As an aside - and not to make light of it - I thought taxation on alcohol was very high in your part of the world in order to make it harder to over indulge?
I hope you find the support you need here. There is loads of it!
As an aside - and not to make light of it - I thought taxation on alcohol was very high in your part of the world in order to make it harder to over indulge?
Member
Join Date: Jun 2016
Location: Adelaide, Australia
Posts: 28,663
Welcome Toolong. Keep reading and sharing. There is a lot of very good information and threads to read, learn and get involved with. SR is a safe, inviting- welcoming and a safe community. It has helped me and others a lot.
My prayers and support to you, PJ.
My prayers and support to you, PJ.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2017
Location: Norway
Posts: 20
Thank you! Yeas, it is widly expecive.... I guess i spend about 300 euros or so (over 3000 NOK) a month, and i really cant afford that..... Sometimes i must get extra money from my dad to stay afloat....
Blue Belt
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Soberville, USA
Posts: 4,174
Too,
It is addiction. You will suffer physically and mentally when you quit.
Initially...the first few months it seems harder each day, then it gets easier and easier to say no to alcohol.
The main thing is wanting to quit. Suffering can also be called feeling uncomfortable.
After a while, your brain heals to a point where you get more natural enjoyment feelings. The booze alters that. This healing takes many months.
This whole time relapse lurks. Relapse...you start over. That is why addiction to drugs, alcohol included, is such a difficult thing.
Alcohol is a toxin. It is a learned addiction. Unlearn it.
Thanks.
It is addiction. You will suffer physically and mentally when you quit.
Initially...the first few months it seems harder each day, then it gets easier and easier to say no to alcohol.
The main thing is wanting to quit. Suffering can also be called feeling uncomfortable.
After a while, your brain heals to a point where you get more natural enjoyment feelings. The booze alters that. This healing takes many months.
This whole time relapse lurks. Relapse...you start over. That is why addiction to drugs, alcohol included, is such a difficult thing.
Alcohol is a toxin. It is a learned addiction. Unlearn it.
Thanks.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2017
Posts: 66
I too loved to drink, and I also hid it from my loved ones.
By the end there wasn't anything fun about it. The fun had gone years ago and had been replaced by a necessity to drink and the horrible guilt shame and remorse of what I was doing to myself and my family. I was treating that shame with alcohol from the minute I awoke.
If drinking is still enjoyable to you and you are able to stop when you need, then you may be luckier than I was
It may be just a case of budgeting better.
If you are truly honest with yourself though and you find you do need to stop, then you're in the right place. There are a lot of great resources here to help you. I wish you all the best with your journey.
By the end there wasn't anything fun about it. The fun had gone years ago and had been replaced by a necessity to drink and the horrible guilt shame and remorse of what I was doing to myself and my family. I was treating that shame with alcohol from the minute I awoke.
If drinking is still enjoyable to you and you are able to stop when you need, then you may be luckier than I was
It may be just a case of budgeting better.If you are truly honest with yourself though and you find you do need to stop, then you're in the right place. There are a lot of great resources here to help you. I wish you all the best with your journey.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2016
Location: Adelaide, Australia
Posts: 28,663
TooLong- addiction has both physical and emotional effects. If you are shaking, feeling very bad- be honest and see a doctor. Emotional stuff- can you go to an AA meeting, see a therapist? Face to face support is very important. There are very few people who can stop drinking - if alcoholic who do it successfully by themselves.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2017
Location: Norway
Posts: 20
Thank you for the warm welcome! ❤
I have a therapaut. To day i had my second-to-last session with her. Been seeing her for a year and a half. I really struggle to open up to people and talk about my self, but i finally felt like making some progress and that she took me serious, and now she is leaving. New, better job, i guess..... I am so angry because of that, Even though i know she is not doing this to hurt me or anyone else. I still feel betrayed.
The day she told me she was leaving, i cried When i got in my car. Later, i drank a couple more than usually, thinking i was getting back at her. Done that a couple of times after that night too.... But i know i am not punishing her, only my self and my family.....
I actually told her a bit more today. Still did not tell her how much i actually drink, but corrected her from saying "one-four" to saying two-four.... Can never tell anyone that i some times have had eight.... and still wanted more. They would freak! (All in the evening)
I have a therapaut. To day i had my second-to-last session with her. Been seeing her for a year and a half. I really struggle to open up to people and talk about my self, but i finally felt like making some progress and that she took me serious, and now she is leaving. New, better job, i guess..... I am so angry because of that, Even though i know she is not doing this to hurt me or anyone else. I still feel betrayed.
The day she told me she was leaving, i cried When i got in my car. Later, i drank a couple more than usually, thinking i was getting back at her. Done that a couple of times after that night too.... But i know i am not punishing her, only my self and my family.....
I actually told her a bit more today. Still did not tell her how much i actually drink, but corrected her from saying "one-four" to saying two-four.... Can never tell anyone that i some times have had eight.... and still wanted more. They would freak! (All in the evening)
Member
Join Date: Jan 2017
Posts: 5
Welcome! I'm new too. Let's do this together. I often hide how much I drink too, but my fiancé is on to me. It doesn't help that he likes to drink too. It makes it that much harder when there's alcohol in the house. I asked him today to hide the vodka from me today and he did. This really sucks but I need to quit. It's not fun anymore. I feel like it's harder as a woman and feel such a stigma. Like, wow, I have a drinking problem. Hang in there! It helps knowing all of these people here have been in the same boat (or are). If they could do it, do can we
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,497
Welcome and I hope that you decide to stop drinking. I, too, remember drinking because I was angry with someone and I was trying to get back at them. Of course, I was only hurting myself, physically and emotionally. It's normal to feel afraid when you are thinking of stopping drinking, but you can do it!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2016
Posts: 782
Welcome Toolong!
This place is a very valuable resource. If you think you have a problem, you likely do. Quitting now is obviously the best course -- before it gets worse and the withdrawal will be much harder. Other than that, not much to add to what has already been said, except this.
Think about this for a moment. If you are spending 300 Euros a month on drink, that is 3600 Euros a year. Think of what you could do with the money you saved from not drinking! that's a nice vacation, or money put towards a house, and all sorts of things.
There is NO downside to quitting drinking. And what is sounds like, if you keep drinking, there is no place to go but down.
This place is a very valuable resource. If you think you have a problem, you likely do. Quitting now is obviously the best course -- before it gets worse and the withdrawal will be much harder. Other than that, not much to add to what has already been said, except this.
Think about this for a moment. If you are spending 300 Euros a month on drink, that is 3600 Euros a year. Think of what you could do with the money you saved from not drinking! that's a nice vacation, or money put towards a house, and all sorts of things.
There is NO downside to quitting drinking. And what is sounds like, if you keep drinking, there is no place to go but down.
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,560
It's so good to have you with us, Toolongway. It's brave to face up to your drinking problem & take action. I have trouble sharing my feelings too - so being here really helped me. Everyone understands, like no one else in my life. You never have to feel alone.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2017
Location: Norway
Posts: 20
I have decided not to drink today. Combination of no money and wanting to regain some control. And, to be honest, a little bit to make my therapist happy.
But, it is harder than i expected.
Usually the feeling of panic and "i cant do this" comes right before the stores close, causing me to run out to by some. Today the awful feeling has been there all day.
I have planned to go to training with some friends tonight. Skipped it the last few weeks so i could stay home drinking in stead. I am trying to focus on the fact that When i get back home and am done showering, it will soon be bedtime, so no time to drink anyways....
But, it is harder than i expected.
Usually the feeling of panic and "i cant do this" comes right before the stores close, causing me to run out to by some. Today the awful feeling has been there all day.
I have planned to go to training with some friends tonight. Skipped it the last few weeks so i could stay home drinking in stead. I am trying to focus on the fact that When i get back home and am done showering, it will soon be bedtime, so no time to drink anyways....
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