K66

No not yet... I'm just trying to wrap my mind around this entire situation... I did however message my head union rep on Facebook as I don't have his cell number... I can't remember the unions exact extent ion and I'd be mortified to ask security for it because I'm well known and they saw everything this morning and know I failed because they let the tester in and gave me the taxi chit home an hour later with tears in my eyes...

K66

I did however a few months back talked with him and told him I had a drinking problem and we talked about rehab and I even talked to the eap rep about the location and then a woman at the rehab facility but then backed out because I was terrified of the conditions... Restrictions from loved ones... And going in general so maybe he can bring that up with HR and may help save my job if I admit that I have a problem and tried to reach out and choked out of fear and tried doing it on my own... But have been struggling... Or they might just look at me as a number and ax me without a care...

columbus

Won't it feel marvelous when you can look back on this in six months and be grateful for the game-changing events you are now enduring?

(you can do it!)

Mountainmanbob

The drunks and addicts at my work place that were always comparing themselves to what others were getting away with (many ended up fired). That excuse in the end seems to carry no weight.
M-Bob

Della1968

I wish I had gone to get help the first time I got caught drinking at work....repairing what is there is much easier than rebuilding after the fall.

K66

I have never had a drop at work in my life (no judgment) it was from the night before 😞

K66

I'm not trying to deflect my addiction by any means I just don't understand why the company would single certain people out and not other, especially those operating heavy machinery... That's all I meant by that.. I own my demon... I've just been trying to hide it... Moderate it clearly unsuccessful at both...

Delilah1

Hi K66,

I'm sorry this happened to you today, but if you reread this post you are not taking any responsibility for the reason you tested positive. Regardless of what anyone else is or isn't doing, you can control whether or not you drink.

If you had a positive test in the past, and signed that agreement you had to know that the possibility of being tested ,ore frequently was likely.

You have the opportunity to use this to get yourself sober for good. Call your union, call the Employee Assistance Program, call and inquire about rehabs in your area.

The worst thing you can do today is drink. Although it seems like this is the worst thing that could happen, it may turn out to be the turning point for you.

You can do this!

K66

Your right it was my decision to risk drinking on a work night... I shouldn't be drinking ANY night... I have good nights with my boyfriend having friendly drinks and laughing... Drinking like him... Like a normal person... But then when alone it's a trigger for me Good old HALT... My biggest trigger it loneliness... I'm not used to living alone I like coming home to the one I love but it's not possible right now... On the days he has his boys I don't see him and those are my bender days... He has them every night but until about 8 so I get to see him those nights but Wednesday and Thursday I don't get to see him at all... I know I should be finding more productive things to do with my alone time... But then my AV starts to whisper sweet lies in my ear like it will keep me company... Keep me warm... But really that whisper is the hiss of a constrictor and every sip its grip gets tighter and tighter slowly suffocating... Taking everything from you... I don't want a hug that kills... A warmth that rots... I don't want to loose all that I love in life to addiction... I'm stronger then that... I just have to find my self worth again...

Della1968

I understood that....I phrased it incorrectly I never drank at work either but had at times had a shot or 2 when I woke up in a panic at 3am. Therefore I was still tipsy at work. I was merely saying I wish when I knew it was a problem I had gotten help instead of waiting till it destroyed everything.

Horn95

K66

If you have not been disciplined before you should be ok. But you will likely have to go into rehab. Your union will protect you. Not only will the reps help you, but they have lawyers who will help you as well. Be proactive though. Get into rehab IMMEDIATELY. That will inure to your benefit on a number of levels.

God luck. And quit now.

Solarion

K66, I wonder if you might have access to a week- or 10-day inpatient detox program to be followed by an outpatient recovery program?

That might be a good, structured way to help you make the change, with the detox part helping with the medical aspects of withdrawal.

Solarion

P.S. -- I'm sorry that I made the wrong assumption about your job at the company -- I thought that you were probably a driver or heavy/dangerous equipment operator based on "union" and "drug-testing".

I suppose it's not too likely you would accidentally kill someone with office work.

But the amount you say you have been drinking can't be good for your health, short-term or long-term.

You are not just here to be a receptacle or drain for alcohol.

Hoping things turn out well for you.

CatfishKid

It's amazing I would come across this today. It's like a crystal ball of what I could find myself walking into. I too have a job with random drug and alcohol testing(CDL). If I blow anything but 000 I'm off the road for 24 hours.....and probably out of a job. The only decent job I've ever had. May we both find success moving forward from this day 1. Best of luck to you

saoutchik

I must say it does not seem right that someone can be strongly coerced into testing when they are working in an office - I could have neen fired 4 days a week in the year before I quit if that had been the case where I work (also an office)

Algorithm

Who did you admit this to?

Talking to EAP is not confidential. It's the same as talking to HR in many cases. You may as well send a memo to the CEO.

You essentially made yourself a target. At this point, I would do everything through your union. Get their phone number.

They will probably make you go to rehab, if they don't fire you, but at least with the union, you have a chance at keeping your job, if that's what you want.

Did they tell you to expect a phone call from HR or the union when they sent you home?

Dee74

Regardless of opinions on whether EAPS are or not confidential - if you keep drinking you'll lose your job and that will be on your record anyway k66.

As nice as it would be to recover without anyone else knowing for some of us that's just not an option. I think you may have passed that point too, K?

D

Forward12

You just are. Stomping your feet and using the excuse of "Well, they're doing it too!" Is childish.

Once you own up to your actions, is when you will be free.

Zebra1275

You just are. Stomping your feet and using the excuse of "Well, they're doing it too!" Is childish.

Once you own up to your actions, is when you will be free.

Well, put.

If you want to save your job, go to rehab. And while you are waiting to get into rehab, go to some AA meetings.

K66

Thank you catfish and best of luck to you also!