bexxed

You hear it all the time.

"So and so is boring now. They don't (_____) anymore."

Drink, do drugs, party, etc.

It's amazing how I internalized this. Somehow youth is equated with altering brain chemistry and youth is equated with being fun. That trifecta doesn't make sense though.

What's more boring than sitting on a barstool in a dark room, day after day, year after year, ingesting the same poison, saying the same lines? If it's not a barstool, then maybe it's a porch, or a kitchen, or a garage, or something else.

I'm grateful that my boring time now is put to good use. It's like when I was a kid. I would get bored, and then realize I was bored and actually do something. For so many years I would get bored and drink, which is really, a very boring activity.

I didn't realize how excruciatingly boring it was until I stopped. I thought it was life that was boring. How wrong I was.

Feeling very grateful

B

Mattq2

Good for you bexxed. I love the sober life for more reasons then I can list. I drank the second go around for fourteen years. After some sober time I woke up real happy one day, sorta scared the crap out of me because I didn't know what it was😀 Hang in there my friend it will only get better

doggoluvr87

What great insight. How boring it is to think consuming a beverage is your favorite hobby! I just put down the drink a few days ago but have also been reminiscing on my childhood/teenage years and truly missing how much FUN I was capable of having. I've never had that much fun drinking, even in the early days when it was still new.

bluedog97

I think alcohol creates the illusion that youre having fun. I thought and lived that for most of my adult life. Society sort of perpetuates that. I could be sitting at home alone getting drunk and believing Im having a good time. Party of one. Its all a lie. Alcohol takes your life away while tricking you into thinking you need it. Man I want to beat this once and for all.

Anna

I think that alcoholism clouds everything in your life. After I stopped drinking, I felt like I needed to get to know myself again.

least

Sobriety, along with gratitude, makes my life worthwhile.

Notimetoloose

Well said. I find a lot of bored people turn to alcohol and drugs as something to do...it changes their mindset and alters their perception and adds escapism and unfortunately can lead to addiction.
I think in initial sobriety there is a huge adjustment as to what to do to fill that void of the alter state....but once out of the rabbit hole, life is richer.

suzie89

Thank you for a wonderful post and reminder. I was feeling like I have gotten a little boring over the holidays, but you've very clearly and eloquently reminded me that there was nothing at all exciting about the way I was drinking at the end. Isolating, falling asleep early, feeling anxious, not exercising, or socializing, or contributing anything. Blah! If this sober me is the boring me, I'll take it!

Doug39

In the early 90's I spent an average of 8 hours a day sitting in bars drinking.

Today I am 73 days sober and since my wife still drinks we occasionally go to a bar - unless we are there to eat, watch sports or play Keno I am bored within a half an hour and ready to go.

thomas11

Good post bexxed. Boredom has caused many a relapse. I think for many its hard to imagine what in the world could possibly replace the void that we spent so many hours doing. It truly is a massive life change. If one can stick with it long enough to get over the hump, it becomes the new normal and quite easy. The trick is having the faith that it will indeed get better.

vulturine

What I hated about drinking, was I'd do something that should have been fun, only to remember small fragments of what should have made the activity fun. My favourite band ever came to Toronto in 2016, but I got too drunk and high with some other people to remember very much of the concert. Sucks. Peer pressure is the worst sometimes.

Scruffanie

Thank you Bexxed. It had been a long time since i found drinking any fun at all. I became boring when I drank because all I wanted to do was stay at home on my own and drink the day away. Drinking had become a neccessity and my only reprieve was passing out.

I have had a rathering boring day today and at one point earlier on I was reflecting that I would have already been drunk and finished my day that way.

I haven't done much today, just reading and hanging with my bird but it has been rather nice to have a guilt free lazy day without any need to drink.

Scruff

JackDsMissus

Great post. Reminds me of something I think I read in an Alan Carr book, he said that we think we are going to be bored if we go to a party and not drink but perhaps the party IS boring. Something like that. I'm like whoaaa, how true.

Drinking alone (which was my thing to do) is freakin boring, can't count the amount of times I've finished a bottle and thought wtf am I doing, I'm bored as hell now that was depressing. When even drinking wasn't doing it for me anymore. (It never was but the scales had fallen from my eyes).

When i'm sober, I never actually want to go to bed cos I get so into reading, writing, watching... it's like at night there's so many things I want to do. It's such a fallacy that drinking makes things more interesting. I'm rambling here lol but your post resonated with me. TY.

August252015

So true! I did and feel the same way that a lot of folks shared above!

Now, I am engaged in the world. I DO things - my boyfriend (also in recovery) and I DO things, not just go out to eat and sit drinking cocktails before, during and after dinner (like I did with my last serious bf). I can pay attention to people and things and I CHOOSE what to do and how to spend my time, and none of it is centered on things like how tipsy I can get and still seem sober when I do x or go to y.

When I get restless or a little bored, my attention span allows me to read a book or watch a show and digest it, or look around me when I walk the dog instead of focusing on not tripping on the sidewalk or.....

Maybe even better, I myself am not boring and repetitive, and enjoy others and vice versa.

Everything is better sober.

MLD51

I was really worried I'd be bored when I quit, because my entire social life centered around drinking. Every social gathering was an excuse to drink - in fact I thought it was a requirement to drink when socializing. I look back and realize that it really wasn't much fun to socialize like that after one or two drinks. Which was always. Never could stop after one or two. So the nights and days of sitting and drinking with "buddies" became like a broken record - same people, same places, same stupid conversations over and over again. What could be more boring than that? I don't socialize as much now, but rather than finding it boring, I find it peaceful and serene. I enjoy quiet time so much now, where before I needed to be out and doing stuff all the time. I think because I didn't like myself much, so the prospect of just being alone at home sounded like torture. Now when I socialize, I choose who and where carefully. I can still be with people who drink, but not for long. I'd rather be hiking, reading, watching movies, etc. than sitting around watching people do what I used to do and thought I enjoyed. A whole new mindset.

Dee74

D

wpainterw

It's not completely "boring". No one said Hell was boring. Lots of things to provide excitement. DUI's, jails, the risk of death or having killed someone, traumatic efforts to detox, painful withdrawal, hideous death from liver failure (once a nurse told me that,having witnessed it, she'd rather die of cancer). Not at all "boring". If you seek excitement Hell is the place to be.

W.

saoutchik

There is nothing more boring than a habitual drunk. If they were capable of talking what would they have to talk about? Sadly I speak from experience

jazzfish

For a long time, I mistook the drama of a drinking life for excitement and satisfaction in life - the fights, the adventures with strangers, missed bills, heated debates, getting sick, struggling through each work day, cranking out something to make a work deadline, etc. There are so many ups and downs that bang you over the head and demand your attention. It sure seemed exciting at the time. What I didn't realize was that all those ups and downs had an increasingly downward trend.

The excitement from drinking was basically chaos, while the excitement from drinking is intentional, meaningful, and add to the quality of my life.

jazzfish

Ack! That should read:

The excitement from drinking was basically chaos, while the excitement from sobriety is intentional, meaningful, and adds to the quality of my life.