3 and out
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Midwest
Posts: 1,697
3 and out
Well after 3 good tries I am still in the trap. My longest running was 10 months but I folded. Debating treatment now. I can not afford it though. I don't have time for AA because I work too much. I am working on a new plan and open to suggestions.... disappointing being a never ending newcomer. 
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,442
I think everyone needs to make time for their recovery.
I understand works important but if you're working so hard that your only relaxation tool is tied to a bottle,and you have no time to look for other ways to deal with things, you're bound to end up in the same damn place, everytime.
Can you delegate some responsibilities maybe? get yourself some time to devise, and then work, your recovery plan?
D
I understand works important but if you're working so hard that your only relaxation tool is tied to a bottle,and you have no time to look for other ways to deal with things, you're bound to end up in the same damn place, everytime.
Can you delegate some responsibilities maybe? get yourself some time to devise, and then work, your recovery plan?
D
Blue Belt
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Soberville, USA
Posts: 4,174
Let,
I have no background to help w relapse after 10 months. I said a prayer for you to have the strength to stay clean.
I am sure there will be a few high time AA folks along to offer some guidance.
Thanks.
I have no background to help w relapse after 10 months. I said a prayer for you to have the strength to stay clean.
I am sure there will be a few high time AA folks along to offer some guidance.
Thanks.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,442
I hate to be obvious but maybe you don't need to hang with drinkers?
Even if you're not totally on board with the ethos, there must be an AA meeting in just about every town.
You could retire to your room after dinner too - a little boring to start with maybe, but you'd be sober - fist step towards whatever kind of life a sober one could be for you.
Bet you'd find things to do after a while
D
Even if you're not totally on board with the ethos, there must be an AA meeting in just about every town.
You could retire to your room after dinner too - a little boring to start with maybe, but you'd be sober - fist step towards whatever kind of life a sober one could be for you.
Bet you'd find things to do after a while
D
Sobriety is Traditional
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Orcas Island, Washington
Posts: 9,067
Hi, letitgo!
I think an all-or-nothing approach is an addictive voice speaking. If rehab won't work, then how about an out-patient program? Can't you even get to one AA meeting just to see what it is all about?
I think an all-or-nothing approach is an addictive voice speaking. If rehab won't work, then how about an out-patient program? Can't you even get to one AA meeting just to see what it is all about?
Member
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 14,921
As someone mentioned, drinking takes a lot of time.
For me, that involved the planning to get alcohol which might have included driving to stores further from my home, so that I could try to remain anonymous.
Then there was the time spent secretly drinking at home, to get to the level of buzz I desired. And once I got there, I had to try to maintain it. And I had to figure out a way to avoid any tasks that took great cognitive or motor skill. God forbid, if I was called upon to drive somewhere to go pick up my kids.
The there was the amount of time spent sleeping it off, or basically being passed out. Sometimes this happened at the most inconvenient times, like at 10:00 p.m. on New Years Eve when we had company over. Missing the start of the new year because you are passed out in bed is embarrassing. However, when you start drinking alone at noon, it's hard to last 12 hours.
Then there was the time spent recovering from drinking. I might be hungover for many hours, this was not a fun time. Also trying to avoid conversations with others, because they might talk about something that occurred the night before, but I have foggy memory of events. Better to shut up, and let people think that I member how the movie ended.
Then there was the time I spent trying to clean up my alcoholic mess. Trying to remember where I left my empties, where I left my car keys, and how to secretly dispose of the empty bottles and cans.
For me, it took a considerable amount of time and energy to be a drunk. I now spend a few hours a week either in an AA meeting, or on this website.
I spend way less time (and energy) staying sober, than I spent drinking.
For me, that involved the planning to get alcohol which might have included driving to stores further from my home, so that I could try to remain anonymous.
Then there was the time spent secretly drinking at home, to get to the level of buzz I desired. And once I got there, I had to try to maintain it. And I had to figure out a way to avoid any tasks that took great cognitive or motor skill. God forbid, if I was called upon to drive somewhere to go pick up my kids.
The there was the amount of time spent sleeping it off, or basically being passed out. Sometimes this happened at the most inconvenient times, like at 10:00 p.m. on New Years Eve when we had company over. Missing the start of the new year because you are passed out in bed is embarrassing. However, when you start drinking alone at noon, it's hard to last 12 hours.
Then there was the time spent recovering from drinking. I might be hungover for many hours, this was not a fun time. Also trying to avoid conversations with others, because they might talk about something that occurred the night before, but I have foggy memory of events. Better to shut up, and let people think that I member how the movie ended.
Then there was the time I spent trying to clean up my alcoholic mess. Trying to remember where I left my empties, where I left my car keys, and how to secretly dispose of the empty bottles and cans.
For me, it took a considerable amount of time and energy to be a drunk. I now spend a few hours a week either in an AA meeting, or on this website.
I spend way less time (and energy) staying sober, than I spent drinking.
Member
Join Date: May 2016
Location: FL
Posts: 28
I travel for work and what has helped me to maintain my sobriety (especially early on) was to retire to my room after conferences/training events instead of going for cocktails. Doesn't mean you have to miss out on networking.
Non-boozy options for networking:
1. Dinners (sans alcohol)
2. Breakfast/coffee
3. Networking lunches
At one social event I encountered a woman who had too much to drink and was slurring terribly during the networking event. Definitely did not make a good impression. I sipped my water and was grateful to be sober.
Protect yourself and your sobriety and things will begin to fall into place.
Non-boozy options for networking:
1. Dinners (sans alcohol)
2. Breakfast/coffee
3. Networking lunches
At one social event I encountered a woman who had too much to drink and was slurring terribly during the networking event. Definitely did not make a good impression. I sipped my water and was grateful to be sober.
Protect yourself and your sobriety and things will begin to fall into place.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Baton Rouge, La.
Posts: 15,238
For all the times I made for drinking, I
replaced it with a recovery program
taught to me. I made and found time
to drink and therefore I found time to
go to AA. No excuse was good enough
to remain sober each and every minute
of the day.
For me, the AA program of recovery
was taught to me 26 yrs ago and was
what I learned and continue to incorporate
in all areas of my life to achieve what so
many have achieved still today, some
one days sober and clean days at a time.
Folks go to early morning meetings before
work, go to noon meetings, go to afternoon
meetings and night meetings. No excuse to
find balance in life and recovery if we want
to be successful in remain sober or clean.
No Excuse. Just my opinion and 2 cents.
replaced it with a recovery program
taught to me. I made and found time
to drink and therefore I found time to
go to AA. No excuse was good enough
to remain sober each and every minute
of the day.
For me, the AA program of recovery
was taught to me 26 yrs ago and was
what I learned and continue to incorporate
in all areas of my life to achieve what so
many have achieved still today, some
one days sober and clean days at a time.
Folks go to early morning meetings before
work, go to noon meetings, go to afternoon
meetings and night meetings. No excuse to
find balance in life and recovery if we want
to be successful in remain sober or clean.
No Excuse. Just my opinion and 2 cents.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2017
Posts: 774
Originally Posted by Beallara 
I travel for work and what has helped me to maintain my sobriety (especially early on) was to retire to my room after conferences/training events instead of going for cocktails. Doesn't mean you have to miss out on networking.
Non-boozy options for networking:
1. Dinners (sans alcohol)
2. Breakfast/coffee
3. Networking lunches
At one social event I encountered a woman who had too much to drink and was slurring terribly during the networking event. Definitely did not make a good impression. I sipped my water and was grateful to be sober.
Protect yourself and your sobriety and things will begin to fall into place.
Non-boozy options for networking:
1. Dinners (sans alcohol)
2. Breakfast/coffee
3. Networking lunches
At one social event I encountered a woman who had too much to drink and was slurring terribly during the networking event. Definitely did not make a good impression. I sipped my water and was grateful to be sober.
Protect yourself and your sobriety and things will begin to fall into place.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: northern michigan. not the U.P.
Posts: 15,281
"Debating treatment now. I can not afford it though. I don't have time for AA because I work too much. "
debating treatment,which would require time, but no time for AA.
hhhhmmmmm.....
meetings are only 1 part of AA. working THE program is what works for members of AA, which doesn't require meetings.
buuuuut, beings how AA is worldwide, there are meetings everywhere.
"Excuses are so easy. "
and deadly.
its possible to have the hotel remove any alcohol from a room. its possible to not be around drinkers. its possible to say "no" which is a complete sentence.
Alcoholics Anonymous : Find Local A.A.
debating treatment,which would require time, but no time for AA.
hhhhmmmmm.....
meetings are only 1 part of AA. working THE program is what works for members of AA, which doesn't require meetings.
buuuuut, beings how AA is worldwide, there are meetings everywhere.
"Excuses are so easy. "
and deadly.
its possible to have the hotel remove any alcohol from a room. its possible to not be around drinkers. its possible to say "no" which is a complete sentence.
Alcoholics Anonymous : Find Local A.A.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: California
Posts: 13,044
Glad you posted, that shows you want sobriety, and you can do it.
There are many different options for recovery, but like others have said you need to make the time.
Maybe you can try exploring in whatever city you happen to be visiting or going to the hotel gym as two options for the evenings. You can also spend time on SR while in your room, or go to an AA meeting.
It gets easier, and it is worth it.
There are many different options for recovery, but like others have said you need to make the time.
Maybe you can try exploring in whatever city you happen to be visiting or going to the hotel gym as two options for the evenings. You can also spend time on SR while in your room, or go to an AA meeting.
It gets easier, and it is worth it.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Midwest
Posts: 1,697
Just tried a meeting today but the schedule was wrong. I do have time for meetings. I feel stuck in the 3 day grind. 1-2 days everything is fine. But day 3 or 4 and back for more. I know I can do it but it's difficult to get back in the routine and stay there.
I am going to spend some time today working on a true plan I can use. Small steps
I am going to spend some time today working on a true plan I can use. Small steps
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Midwest
Posts: 1,697
Well my new plan similar to others goes like this:
Exercise
Gratuity list
Reading and growing
A bath everyday
And recognizing the positive:
Your thinking determines your quality of life. The most common types of negative thinking are all-or-nothing thinking, disqualifying the positives, and negative self-labeling. If you change your thinking, you will change your life.
Exercise
Gratuity list
Reading and growing
A bath everyday
And recognizing the positive:
Your thinking determines your quality of life. The most common types of negative thinking are all-or-nothing thinking, disqualifying the positives, and negative self-labeling. If you change your thinking, you will change your life.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,442
There are some great ideas and suggestions here too let:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ery-plans.html
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ery-plans.html
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,442
There are some great ideas and suggestions here too let:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ery-plans.html
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ery-plans.html
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